Posted on 05/27/2004 8:01:14 AM PDT by Nasty McPhilthy
Uncle Albert Speaks 05/27/2004
Finally, there's some good news for the Bush campaign.
Al Gore has spoken out.
We haven't heard much from old Woodhead since he delivered his nomination-clinching endorsement speech for Howard Dean, right before Dean's big victory in the Iowa Caucuses.
You remember that, don't you?
He's a clever one that Gore. Doesn't let himself get overexposed. Saves up his ammunition for just the right moment and then disappears to…where? Does he go back to Tennessee and hoe tobacco on the Gore family farm? Or perhaps to some quiet room in Silicon Valley where he can refine his invention of the Internet? Oh, no, he's probably been down in Texas working on disaster relief with FEMA.
Wherever he's been, it's sure good to have him back.
Having saved the country from Howard Dean, he's now doing his best to save it from John Kerry.
His speech was so over the top, I've got to believe it was written by George Soros. In fact, it may well have been. None of the coverage I've seen mentions it, but the event where Gore spoke was a fund-raiser sponsored by Soros' MoveOn PAC, the hard money branch of the MoveOn.org soft-money operation that has been salaciously attacking Bush for months now under a loophole in the Bipartisan Campaign Reform Act. You remember that bill, the one we used to call McCain-Feingold? The one that was going to end all that nasty soft money in politics? Well, guess what? There's going to be more soft money spent in politics this year than ever before. Some reform.
And there was Uncle Albert (We're So Sorry If We Caused You Any Pain) ranting away at the MoveOn podium. How much did he raise for the organization? How much did he get paid to raise it? We don't know, because these so-called 527 Committees don't have the same reporting requirements as the ones McCain and Feingold reined in so brilliantly and thoroughly last year. The organization's PAC, though, would have to file reports, so maybe we will find out; but don't count on the media to do a story when the reports eventually get filed.
In the speech, Gore said Abu Ghraib was a "natural consequence of the Bush Administration policy" that "flowed directly from the abuse of the truth that characterized the Administration's march to war."
Remember a couple of weeks ago when I wrote about Abu Ghraib "bracket creep." I said, "Trust me, before moveon.org gets done, the President will have personally paid for the cameras used to take the pictures so he and Rumsfeld could chuckle over them in the White House sauna." It's all happening.
Speaking of Donald Rumsfeld, Gore called for his resignation, along with the resignations of Condoleezza Rice, George Tenet, Paul Wolfowitz, Douglas J. Feith, Stephen A. Cambone. I have a confession to make. I don't know who those last two people are. They have, nonetheless, just made it to an honored position on my heroes list. If Al Gore demands your resignation, you're okay in my book.
To hear Gore tell it, there was no terrorist threat to the United States at all until Bush and the Savage Six decided to make those poor innocent Muslim extremists angry. But as RNC Communications Director Jim Dyke pointed out in a release: "Al Gore served as Vice President of this country for eight years. During that time, Osama Bin Laden declared war on the United States five times and terrorists killed US citizens on at least four different occasions including the first bombing of the World Trade Center, the attacks on Khobar Towers, our embassies in East Africa, and the USS Cole.
"Al Gore's attacks on the President today demonstrate that he either does not understand the threat of global terror, or he has amnesia."
I didn't think anything could rescue Bush from the problems created by the Abu Ghraib tragedy. But by going completely beyond all bounds of reason and decency - he even accuses Bush of operating a whole "American Gulag" - Gore has done more than Republicans could have hoped.
At the end of his speech, Gore pats himself on the back for having accepted the Supreme Court decision in Bush v Gore, citing his "strong belief that we are a nation of laws."
Thank you, Uncle Albert. We're so sorry you had to go through that. And thank you, too, for demonstrating once again how fortunate we were that you didn't manage to get the few hundred additional votes you needed in Florida.
The Republicans should play your speech over and over again so people can see just how close they came to having a truly contemptible man as President.
Bump.
Great reading, good points. Author has a way with words and sarcasm.
"Al Gore's attacks on the President today demonstrate that he either does not understand the threat of global terror, or he has amnesia."
both?
"Uncle Albert?"..more like "Fat Albert!!"
This one was even better than the "Dean scream". Thanks Al. Rush is right, your loss of power has driven you INSANE, thanks again.
Jane's First Law of Politics:
Those in power get smug and overconfident, those out of power go insane.............
" I TELL YOU!! I TELL YOOOOU! THE END IS NEAR!! THE END IS NEAR!! AHHHH! WE MUST ALL MAKE SURE OUR REFRIGERATORS USE LESS ENERGY WHEN NOT IN USE!!! AAARRRRGGGAAH!!!
Algores greatest concern in the face of global terror...All appliances must be Energy Star efficient.
ping
Gore apparently drinks waaaaay too much coffee (darned caffeine!) and really sweats a lot.
The fool has said in his heart that AL Gore is smart..
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