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German Men Told They Can No Longer Stand and Deliver (Stehpinkeln verboten!)
The Telegraph ^ | August 18, 2004 | Kate Connolly

Posted on 08/18/2004 12:57:39 PM PDT by quidnunc

German men are being shamed into urinating while sitting down by a gadget which is saving millions of women from cleaning up in the bathroom after them.

The WC ghost, a £6 voice-alarm, reprimands men for standing at the lavatory pan. It is triggered when the seat is lifted. The battery-operated devices are attached to the seats and deliver stern warnings to those who attempt to stand and urinate (known as "Stehpinkeln").

"Hey, stand-peeing is not allowed here and will be punished with fines, so if you don't want any trouble, you'd best sit down," one of the devices orders in a voice impersonating the German leader, Chancellor Gerhard Schroder. Another has a voice similar to that of his predecessor, Helmut Kohl.

(Excerpt) Read more at telegraph.co.uk ...


TOPICS: Culture/Society; Editorial; Extended News; Germany
KEYWORDS: eurotwits; genderwars; metrosexuals; squatpissing; urinal
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1 posted on 08/18/2004 12:57:41 PM PDT by quidnunc
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To: quidnunc
reprimands men for standing at the lavatory pan. It is triggered when the seat is lifted.

Be careful what you wish for. Law of Unintended Consequences says that this device will simply make men stop lifting the seat.

2 posted on 08/18/2004 12:59:00 PM PDT by krb
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To: quidnunc

geez.... what a bunch of freaks..


3 posted on 08/18/2004 12:59:26 PM PDT by Awestruck (The artist formerly known as Goodie D)
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To: quidnunc

Both voices similar to that of Hillary Clinton...


4 posted on 08/18/2004 12:59:47 PM PDT by theDentist ("John Kerry changes positions more often than a Nevada prostitute.")
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To: quidnunc

In my world, toilets are supposed to take crap, not dish it out.

Anyone who brings one of those abominable things into my area will not like what I do to the talking toilet.


5 posted on 08/18/2004 1:00:19 PM PDT by Prime Choice (I remember when John Kerry last lied to us. It is seared into my mind.)
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To: krb
The battery-operated devices are attached to the seats and deliver stern warnings

I hope they're waterproof... cuz, if I lifted the seat and heard it warning me, I know where the stream would be headed!

6 posted on 08/18/2004 1:00:34 PM PDT by So Cal Rocket (Fabrizio Quattrocchi: "Adesso vi faccio vedere come muore un italiano")
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To: quidnunc
Hey, stand-peeing is not allowed here and will be punished with fines, so if you don't want any trouble, you'd best sit down," one of the devices orders in a voice impersonating the German leader, Chancellor Gerhard Schroder. Another has a voice similar to that of his predecessor, Helmut Kohl.

I think they need to go a little further back in German history to insure full compliance.

7 posted on 08/18/2004 1:01:01 PM PDT by Leroy S. Mort
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To: quidnunc

Maybe they will start peeing on the floor instead.


8 posted on 08/18/2004 1:01:08 PM PDT by Feiny (You should never underestimate the predictability of stupidity.)
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To: quidnunc

After a long standing (no pun intended) argument I had to PROVE to my fiance I wasn't peeing on the seat.

Its seems women think that any drop of water within 3 feet of a toilet is the result of urination. I made her stand in the bathroom, verify no spots were anywhere. Then I flushed the toilet a couple of times. She was shocked to see an occasional drop of water fly out of the toilet.

Case closed!


9 posted on 08/18/2004 1:01:19 PM PDT by ruiner
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To: krb
That's what I was thinking. Leave the seat down and hose the joint. (Trying to hit the voice gizmo and hoping it's not high voltage.)
10 posted on 08/18/2004 1:01:39 PM PDT by OSHA (Cheap Shots, Low Blows and Late Hits. Free Delivery. Fast Friendly Service with a Smile!)
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To: krb

Or urinating on the device. Urine contains salts that will quickly destroy the electronics.


11 posted on 08/18/2004 1:02:34 PM PDT by Blood of Tyrants (Even if the government took all your earnings, you wouldn't be, in its eyes, a slave.)
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To: ruiner

You need to get a hobby.


12 posted on 08/18/2004 1:02:41 PM PDT by Leroy S. Mort
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To: quidnunc

The forgot the "Sieg Heil" at the end of that message.


13 posted on 08/18/2004 1:02:42 PM PDT by KellyAdmirer
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To: quidnunc

I'd bust open the device and piss on all its circuits and transistors.


14 posted on 08/18/2004 1:02:47 PM PDT by FredWolfe
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To: quidnunc

That damn thing had better be waterproof.


15 posted on 08/18/2004 1:02:48 PM PDT by Petronski (First algore invented everything, then Kerry smuggled it to Cambodia.)
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To: quidnunc

This cr@p is an example of the bilge that comes out of a government relieved for the past 60 years of many of its more serious responsibilities, such as national defense. This is proof that we need to get our forces out of the Eurosocialist states, sooner rather than later.


16 posted on 08/18/2004 1:02:59 PM PDT by Emile
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To: Awestruck

Are you kidding?

Ever step into public restrooms where some slob urinated all over the seat? Makes you wonder if he actually got any inside the bowl.


17 posted on 08/18/2004 1:03:03 PM PDT by 1stFreedom (What are your thoughts? (Please spare the condescending "get over it" comments.))
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To: mhking

If this does not qualify for a JD ping, I do not know what does... :-)


18 posted on 08/18/2004 1:04:06 PM PDT by NCjim
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To: quidnunc

Kerry = Sitzpinkler


19 posted on 08/18/2004 1:04:19 PM PDT by Gulf War One
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To: quidnunc

I always thought that 'german men pee sitting down' was just an insult to their masculinity, not the actual reality!


20 posted on 08/18/2004 1:04:21 PM PDT by blanknoone (Everything is impossible to those who refuse to try.)
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