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With the Modern Telephone Service Even the Testicles Can Be Insured (German to English)
MorgenPost.Berlin ^ | Sunday, 17 October 2004 | Von Von Eckhard Fuhr

Posted on 10/16/2004 9:09:55 PM PDT by fight_truth_decay

My Week

[Translated from German]

This week I was called by a woman employee of a credit card company. She asked me whether I mean testicles to insure wanted. I had straight lamb chops in the pan, when the telephone rang. The woman employee had an easily Frankish accent. It rolled R. I noticed that, when she said "Prostata". It began not with the testicles, but more generally. I am, said her knowing, already accident-insured and also in any way in the best way took certainly precautions. Now however offer the map for particularly good customers a very attractive product.

If I understood it correctly, she meant with it an extended accident insurance, which pays also with physical damage, which develops due to cancer illnesses. "I call you times a few numbers, which will convince, said you" the credit card woman employee, "you present itself, you cut yourselves in the thumbs, and the thumb remains rigidly, then the insurance 20 000 euro pays you." That seemed to me rather much. "and then you get Prostatakrebs", continued them, "and lose your testicles." Probably it had somewhat jumped over.

But they were there expressed, the testicles, them lay as it were on the table. Their loss me, heard I from the telephone, retaliated with 30 000 euro. To me little seemed compared with the thumb. I fell the lady in the word, that must a misunderstanding be probably whether she had looked also in the correct column. It cannot be nevertheless that the man strength is more worth only 10 000 euro than the mobility of a thumb. But it persisted in its numbers: 30 000, and no more cent. I became furious and called my son too, he was to turn the chops. My Telefongespraechspartnerin blaffte I on, I would let with me about a conclusion of a contract talk even if I mean dog coinsure let could, later. That had I kastrieren to leave, because he had the illness, which is not approaching for me hopefully. There the lady had to laugh. One can say: She laughed cordial. "which breeding tent with you on the stove?" she asked. The Brutzeln was rather loud. ", I answered lamb chops". Thereupon it said. "I could make that also again once, my Turk have the best."

We terminated the telephone call without result. My testicles remained without insurance protection, and them did not take commission. But we had talked at least about the meal. I ask myself, what in this country it is loose that women want to insure the testicles to a wild stranger. Hartz Iv obedience already hurrying ahead is probable. Everyone must accept each reasonable work. And which should be unreasonable at the testicle insuring? Therefore I terminated also the telephone call not with the reference to urgent kitchen business abruptly or presented mutely in cold verachtung the listener simply. Perhaps it tried for the first time in its life to sell at the telephone an insurance and knew in its excitement not, where begin with the Anpreisen of the achievement and the proof of the indispensableness of a conclusion.

I understand such a thing, if I remember, how before many years for the first time a passenger rose to me in the taxi, who wanted naturally to an address, which I could not do. We erred together, it the city plan on the knees, by areas, which we had not ever seen, naturally with switched off taxameter. I paid extra. If I would be guessed/advised to an intolerant contemporary, would have I mean taxi driver career terminated, before she began correctly. I believe, if we want the necessary reforms of the job market, and we want it with hot heart, then may be more annoying us in the future nothing.

We will be surrounded from service offers, from which we made ourselves now to still no picture. And we must to all these people, which offer us somewhat, which we do not need, friendly its. Because it could be that an unfriendly word leads to the death of a I AG. That cannot answer for anybody.


TOPICS: Business/Economy; Culture/Society; Editorial; Germany; News/Current Events
KEYWORDS: insurance; jobs; outsourcing; telemarketing; turkey
A little lost, but a little savored in the translation.

http://morgenpost.berlin1.de/inhalt/politik/

Free Translator for reading the Berliner Morgenpost, should you want to read other events of the day.

1 posted on 10/16/2004 9:09:58 PM PDT by fight_truth_decay
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To: fight_truth_decay

"which breeding tent with you on the stove?" she asked. "

I don't know what this means. I thought I'd been around the block, but I am unfamiliar with these german customs.

I am going to look over my insurance plan and see if my testicles are included in the coverage. I imagine this will be usefull when I figure out some of these german techniques.


2 posted on 10/16/2004 9:15:42 PM PDT by orangelobster
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To: fight_truth_decay
good lord. have you tried running it through the other translation thing... babelfish?

My Telefongespraechspartnerin blaffte I on,

I hate when that happens.

3 posted on 10/16/2004 9:16:15 PM PDT by GeronL (John Kerry believes in a right to privacy and in gay rights............ ask "fair game" Mary Cheney)
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To: fight_truth_decay

"But they were there expressed, the testicles, them lay as it were on the table."

I can't tell if this was meant to be intentionally funny or not.


4 posted on 10/16/2004 9:16:27 PM PDT by Kirkwood (I think, therefore I am Republican!)
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To: fight_truth_decay
My testicles remained without insurance protection

That one translated clearly

5 posted on 10/16/2004 9:16:59 PM PDT by GeronL (John Kerry believes in a right to privacy and in gay rights............ ask "fair game" Mary Cheney)
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To: fight_truth_decay; martin_fierro; arasina; fortunecookie

I found that I had horrible coverage, but for a small fee, I was able to add a Testicular Coverage Rider, so now all is well.


6 posted on 10/16/2004 9:18:06 PM PDT by Petronski (I'm not always cranky.)
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To: fight_truth_decay

Proving once more that it takes balls to be a translator.


7 posted on 10/16/2004 9:18:43 PM PDT by TADSLOS (Right Wing Infidel since 1954)
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To: Charles Henrickson; mikrofon

Ich bin ein Telefongespraechspartnerin.


8 posted on 10/16/2004 9:21:47 PM PDT by martin_fierro ()
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To: GeronL
Yes, babelfish was not as clear; but added in my comment the link to babelfish. I went through 2 translating sites. But I figured was somewhat more interesting in the cross over of translation..If it were perfect then it would not be as humorous.
9 posted on 10/16/2004 9:22:01 PM PDT by fight_truth_decay
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To: fight_truth_decay

Rosie O'Donut has that coverage.


10 posted on 10/16/2004 9:23:18 PM PDT by Hank Rearden (Never allow anyone who could only get a government job attempt to tell you how to run your life.)
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To: Kirkwood
to be intentionally funny or not

I think the author added his sense of humor to this and the translation process added to it. I was reading serious news in there, then found this under Culture..

11 posted on 10/16/2004 9:25:01 PM PDT by fight_truth_decay
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To: GeronL
Telefongespraechspartnerin = telephone conversation partner
12 posted on 10/16/2004 9:28:52 PM PDT by yazd
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To: Hank Rearden

Ah, if only Kerry were german,he simply could've cashed in his policy and not had to marry his money (twice).


13 posted on 10/16/2004 9:32:09 PM PDT by TeddyCon
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To: TeddyCon

This was an excerpt on Kerry, Bush, guns, gay marriage etc ..translated.

Fight for the minorities
Of Americas minorities are for the US choice a crucial factor. But for whom they will be correct?


The weapon carriers

44 million American possess firearms. 3,4 million belong the NRA, the Hueterin of the second constitutional amendment: over the right to carry weapons. John Kerry ranks, as for instance also Michael of moorlands, among the leisure hunter parliamentary group of the NRA. It [Kerry]hunts pheasants, ducks, game up to the respect, how it confessed "Field and Stream" to the Naturburschenmagazin, which presents Kerry and Bush in one of its last numbers. But it hunts with pellet, not with a AKÂ 47. Therefore the NRA regards it as an enemy and proves to it "59 anti- Gun Voten" over 20 years in the senate. Semiautomatic weapons were more difficult ten years long legally despite some gaps to arise, until the spell at the beginning of of Septembers ran out: Because the NRA had convinced the congress majority and Bush that the prohibition had saved nobody, but for many the fun had spoiled, "that humans kill, not weapons". 57 per cent of the owners of weapon wanted the prohibition extended to know. In vain.

The NRA will spend the pistol up to the choice 400Â 000 dollar per week on TV Spots and in all friendship Bush on the chest will set. The dead man Kerry has the threats at least behind itself.

http://morgenpost.berlin1.de/inhalt/politik/


14 posted on 10/16/2004 9:40:59 PM PDT by fight_truth_decay
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To: Kirkwood
"But they were there expressed, the testicles, them lay as it were on the table."

It's Shakespeare on crack.

Nik
15 posted on 10/16/2004 9:43:50 PM PDT by Nik Naym
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To: Nik Naym
"But they were there expressed, the testicles, them lay as it were on the table."

Reminds me of a frat party I attended once in college...

16 posted on 10/16/2004 10:16:57 PM PDT by Dont Mention the War (How important a Senator can you be if Dick Cheney's never told you to "go [bleep] yourself"?)
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To: martin_fierro

Ich bin ein Telefongespraechspartnerin.

Yup... I figured as much... John F. Kennedy is now reincarnated !!! ;-))


17 posted on 10/16/2004 11:52:06 PM PDT by GeekDejure ( LOL = Liberals Obey Lucifer !!!)
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To: yazd
Telefongespraechspartnerin = telephone conversation partner

...female.

18 posted on 10/17/2004 12:14:08 AM PDT by Erasmus
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To: Nik Naym
It's Shakespeare on crack.

I saw that movie.

19 posted on 10/17/2004 12:15:19 AM PDT by Erasmus
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To: fight_truth_decay
Do Germans actually have testicles to insure? News to me.
20 posted on 10/17/2004 2:05:59 AM PDT by Vigilanteman (crime would drop like a sprung trapdoor if we brought back good old-fashioned hangings)
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To: orangelobster; martin_fierro; Charles Henrickson
"which breeding tent with you on the stove?"

Idiomatic translation-
"what's in your wallet?"

21 posted on 10/17/2004 9:10:28 AM PDT by mikrofon (Extended accident insurance also offered for the p.....)
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