Vince, what about the proverbial 'fighting words'? Is that a justifiable category anymore?
Here is one example; when I was in the service I knew a black man that was trying to break off a relationship with a white woman. He avoided her as much as he could, but she would occasionally find him as she knew he had to be at certain places at certain times.
One day she started a confrontation with him and he tried to calm things down. But she knew the buttons to push, and she pushed them hard. Finally she dropped the 'N bomb', shouting, 'Who do you think you are? Your just a F***ing N***er!'
Now this man was a sergeant and she was doing this in front of his men, openly disrespecting him in the most egregious way, then that last phrase; it was just too much for the guy and he slapped her. He didnt draw blood, or bruise her face - it was just a stinging slap that shut her up, which is what needed to happen.
I think he was totally justified.
I know of a case where a guy was playing basketball and a woman had been harrassing him for weeks for various reasons. She would call him names and ridicule him and nothing he could say to her would get her off his back.
He goes in for a layup, and she runs out on the court and yanked down his shorts just as he jumps up. He was shocked and humiliated and slapped the woman several times. She fled crying and never bothered him again. She suffered no serious injury, but the man ended his torment when she went over the line and physically touched him inappropriately.
Another case for justifiable slappage in my opinion.
Today both those men would have gone to jail, and that is absurd, but we will live in a society that is dominated by PC ideology and it dominates the thinking of even conservatives.
Violence is always wrong? So John Wayne was an abuser?
For a man to act like a man naturally is prone to act has been criminalized today as part of an effort to 'deconstruct the patriarchy', and conservtives are being duped into supporting it in cases like this.
But people can read it for themselves right there on CNN - a man doesnt even have to touch a woman now and it is considered 'abuse'.
And is it a wonder that we are seeing marriage rates drop and divorce rates climb?
We need to return to common sense values and drop it with the broad sweeping generalizations and remember that real life has a lot of gray areas and a lot of exceptions to any general rule.
But that is the design of the laws and terms used in this case, as the feminist radicals are hoping to see innocent men jailed in an effort to diminish male influence in society.
But dont get mad at me; I am just calling it like I see it.
What an interesting thread!
As to trivial slaps- I guess I found the term a contradiction in itself. If I'm provoked enough to slap someone- it's not trivial- nor would I feel that way on the receiving end.
No doubt- there are women who seem to delight in driving men to the edge, and who - for whatever twisted reasons- push the buttons they know will result in violence. I've watched women do this- and been ashamed of them. I'm not talking here about women who get themselves into relationships with men who habitually beat them, using violence as a way to problem-solve. That's a different problem.
There've been so many nameless and subtle changes in our culture since I was young. It looks as though we've taken away every refuge from men- every place and circumstance where they could be guys just hanging out being guys. We demand they be more like us- while we seem to have taken on the qualities we told them we hated in them. Not long ago I was discussing these things with my son- who belongs to the last all men institution we tolerate in our country- combat infantry. To him- the brotherhood of the infantry is a gift he knows he'll never have again.
Sorry to drift off-point:) I do understand we can feel provoked (men and women) to behave badly. If we lose our temper- and strike someone in anger- we ought not be surprised at the consequences. I don't think it matters who is doing the slapping. If you're striking out in self-defense it goes without saying it's justified.
I've enjoyed reading this thread- lots of views- gets the cobwebs out of my brain:)
Yes, I do think a slap (as long as it's not going to cause real bodily harm) can be a justified response to a grave insult, but this I would consider as justified self-defense to a verbal and emotional assault. And certainly, when a woman is openly disrespectful in front of a sergeant's men, that definitely calls for some sort of strong response; otherwise he loses the respect of his men.