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Michael Schiavo: A refusal to quit in the face of threats, anguish and vitriol.
The Inquirer ^ | Mar. 20, 2005 | Sandy Bauers

Posted on 03/20/2005 6:06:29 PM PST by Former Military Chick

He's been vilified on Web sites and talk shows. He's been called a wife-abuser, an adulterer, a money-grubbing murderer.

Death threats have been left in his mailbox.

Throngs of protesters have waved signs and chanted outside his house in Clearwater, Fla., and they have gathered again.

Sometimes, even Michael Schiavo's friends have wondered why, in the face of all that, he didn't just walk away.

It would have been easier for him to relinquish guardianship of his severely incapacitated wife, Terri, to her parents.

So why not give it up, leave Terri's feeding tube in, let her parents care for her? After all, he is living with another woman now and they have two children.

"Because he's sticking by what he promised," Scott Schiavo, Michael's brother, said in a recent interview. "He wants to honor the last thing he can give to her."

Physicians have testified that Terri Schiavo is in a persistent vegetative state and will never improve. Michael Schiavo has said his wife told him she would not want to live like this.

Her parents, Bob and Mary Schindler, formerly of Huntingdon Valley, say she is responsive and can be helped. They say that, as a Catholic, she would choose life at all costs.

On Friday, Terri Schiavo's feeding tube, which has been in place for all but two brief stretches of time since she collapsed in 1990, was removed. It could be brief this time as well. The House is expected today to consider a Senate bill that would allow Schiavo's parents to take their case to federal court.

Throughout the protracted legal battle, the Schindlers have made their religious views, their personal anguish, and their mistrust of Michael Schiavo a public cause.

Intensely private, according to his family and friends, Michael Schiavo has rarely spoken publicly about the matter, out of respect for his wife's privacy. Through his brother, he declined to be interviewed for this story.

However, in recent days he has gone on national TV to reiterate that Terri would not have wanted to live like this and criticize politicians for getting involved in a deeply personal matter.

His brother and friends also have decided that it's time to speak up. The mudslinging, they said, has become too ugly, too nasty.

"I have a friend who I think has been maligned," said Russ Hyden of Gainesville, Fla.

"We're tired of it. We're done. It's time people know who he is," said Scott Schiavo, who lives in Levittown near where the brothers were raised.

The thing is, even if Michael Schiavo wins the final court battle, and Terri Schiavo's feeding tube is removed, he really hasn't won at all, Scott said.

"He's already lost," he said. "He's already lost Terri."

Social with friends, but reclusive

His brother and friends describe Michael Schiavo as social within his circle of friends, but otherwise almost reclusive. Except for the No Trespassing sign on his front lawn and the armed guards he's occasionally hired to protect his home, he's tried to grasp whatever shreds of normalcy he can.

His friends don't see the demon that protesters who have hurled insults at him do.

Wilma Mackay, a 65-year-old retiree from Palm Harbor, Fla., who watched her husband and brother die of cancer, sees a man who is "the epitome of loyalty."

Bonnie Rowley of Largo, Fla., a friend for about a decade, sees someone who "stands strong on what he believes in, and that is Terri Schiavo. If I needed a health-care advocate, he'd be my first choice. I know he'd be there till the end, and he'd give it one hell of a fight."

Michael Schiavo, 41, was the youngest of five boys. Six-foot-seven, athletic and model-handsome, he met Terri Schindler at Bucks County Community College in 1982.

She had graduated from Archbishop Wood High School in Warminster, he from Woodrow Wilson High School in Bristol Township.

Married two years later, they moved to Florida, where, early on the morning of Feb. 25, 1990, Michael Schiavo has testified, he awoke to the sound of a thud and found Terri on the floor in the hallway, unconscious.

They had been married a little over five years.

He has spent three times as long - the last 15 years - first trying to bring her back, then trying to let her go, his friends and brother say.

In the beginning, they say, Schiavo was relentless in his search for his wife's cure. She underwent various therapies.

He rented a house large enough for him and Terri's parents, who had moved to the area.

He made sure she was dressed every day. He applied her makeup and dabbed on perfume, Rowley said.

He went to school to become a nurse, "because he wanted to take care of Terri," Scott said. "He swore that he could get Terri better... . One doctor said: 'Mike, you know what? There's nothing else we can do. The next time Terri gets sick, why don't you just let nature take its course?' And Mike wouldn't do it."

Death and defining moments

Many of the defining moments of Michael Schiavo's life have revolved around death.

In 1988, his grandmother was hospitalized with a serious illness. She had signed a "do not resuscitate" order, Scott Schiavo said, but when she worsened in the middle of the night, no one looked at her records.

"It took them I don't know how long to get her breathing again. They stuck a ventilator down her throat." To little avail. "She was brain-dead," Scott Schiavo recalled.

All the family could do was wait until medications that kept her heart beating wore off. It took a day and a half, he said.

After the funeral, the family went to the Buck Hotel in Feasterville. Scott and Terri were sitting next to each other at a large table, where the conversation turned to how upset their grandmother would have been at her final hours.

Terri turned to him, Scott Schiavo said, "and she said, 'Not me, no way, I don't want that.' She says, 'If I'm ever like that, oh, don't let me. Pull that tube out of me.' " Scott Schiavo said he testified about the incident in 2000.

Several years after Terri collapsed, Michael Schiavo's mother was diagnosed with cancer.

Eventually, medical complications required the removal of her feeding tube, Scott said. "It's not like we said: 'Turn it off.' "

She was kept "peaceful and out of pain" until she died, Scott said.

Then their father died.

Eventually, Scott said, his brother realized he would have to let Terri go, too.

The Schindlers - who did not respond to a request for an interview made through their lawyer - have been distrustful of his motives partly because, they have said, no one mentioned Terri's wishes until years after her collapse.

But, Scott said, "it's not something you think about while Mike's trying to save her life... . It's something that people do when there's nothing left to do."

This particular fight has not come without a price.

"I give Mike all the credit in the world, because I would have snapped already. I know how bad it hurts me when I hear people talking about him and downing him," Scott Schiavo said.

Most of all, Scott said, "the thing that tears him up is he worries at nighttime, if he's working. He's afraid for the kids and Jodi."

Love and moral dilemmas

Michael Schiavo met his girlfriend, identified in court records as Jodi Centonze, about a decade ago.

Initially, Rowley, who was Centonze's friend, didn't know what to think. The court battles had not yet heated up, but she knew the situation with Terri.

When Rowley met Michael Schiavo, what she noticed first was his "great smile, a gentle smile."

Gradually, her respect grew. "He could have stepped off and divorced Terri five years ago, when this really hit the court. And got married and started his family that way," Rowley said.

The couple has two toddlers - a daughter and a son. Michael Schiavo works in the medical unit of the Pinellas County Jail.

Both Centonze and Michael Schiavo had to face "their own moral dilemmas as far as having children out of wedlock," Rowley said. "But the two of them weren't getting any younger... So does that make him a bad person because he did that? Did he fluff his responsibility to Terri at any point? No."

It is Centonze, Scott Schiavo said, who now does all Terri's laundry. "She's been unbelievable. She supported Mike in everything he did... . She's gone with Mike to visit Terri. She's helped Mike clean Terri up."

Centonze has been a flashpoint for Michael Schiavo's critics who think it is a reason to disqualify him to be Terri's guardian. His living with Centonze "abrogates the covenant of marriage," said Rob Schenck, president of the National Clergy Council, who was among the demonstrators outside the hospice on Friday.

Looking back on it now, Scott thinks his brother "just wanted somebody to love him." He equates it with a widower who remarries, "but it doesn't mean that that person stopped loving their spouse that passed on. Mike was very lonely. I mean, he was a 26-year-old kid" when Terri collapsed.

"It's hard to imagine the circumstances he lived under," friend Russ Hyden said. "There was no closure, yet there was no companionship either. That's the worst possible scenario."

Hyden had met Schiavo in 1991. Hyden's pregnant wife had been diagnosed with cancer. A mutual friend thought they "might have something in common. And we did."

But it was more than that they were both going through "life-changing ordeals," Hyden said. "We both liked to play a little golf. We enjoyed each other's company."

Hyden scoffs at the accusations about Schiavo taking the malpractice money awarded to Terri. "If there was so much money, where was that money when I first met Mike? Why wasn't he driving a big car and living in a big home? He was driving a Jeep and living in an apartment."

Hyden's wife lived for almost three more years. He and Schiavo spoke or saw each other several times a week.

"He was always great with my kids," Hyden said. Hyden's daughter was 2, his son 7, and Michael brought them gifts.

"He spent a great deal of time helping me put my family back together," Hyden said. "Perhaps it was because his had fallen so tragically apart."

Sympathy for Terri's parents

In a way, Michael Schiavo has said he can sympathize with Terri's parents. "I have children, and, you know, I couldn't even fathom what it would be like to lose a child," he said in an interview on Nightline last week.

But, he continued, "they know the condition Terri is in. They were there in the beginning. They heard the doctors. They know that Terri's in a persistent vegetative state. They testified to that at the original trial. Fifteen years - you've got to come to grips with it sometime."

He said Terri would "always be a part of my life.

"And to sit here and be called a murderer and an adulterer by people that don't know me, and a governor stepping into my personal, private life, who doesn't know me either? And using his personal gain to win votes, just like the legislators are doing right now, pandering to the religious right, to the people up there, the antiabortion people, standing outside of Tallahassee?

"What kind of government is this? This is a human being. This is not right."

In a way, Michael Schiavo's world still revolves around Terri. He calls every day and visits several times a week, Scott Schiavo said. He can still talk to her, even if she doesn't talk back.

Michael Schiavo yesterday told CNN that he had a "sense of relief" now that the feeding tube had been removed and he promised to "stay by her side" till the end.

"This is her time...," he said. "I will love her and I will hold her hand."

--------------------------

Contact staff writer Sandy Bauers at 610-701-7635 or sbauers@phillynews.com.

* * * * * * * * * *

Congress tries again to stop Schiavo death

Timeline of the Terri Schiavo Case

Recent court rulings and other materials related to the Terri Schiavo case:

5 Wishes a Site that helps one prepare if one is unable to speak for themselves.

Partnership for Caring

Statutory Form of Declaration

* * * * * * * * * *


TOPICS: News/Current Events
KEYWORDS: congress; endoflife; michaelschiavo; schiavo; terri; terrischiavo
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To: sruleoflaw
Maybe the folks who call him a murderer are a little strong, but what do you call a "husband" who lives with another woman and fathers two children with her -- AND spends $440,000 of therapy money on right-to-die lawyers. These folks aren't far off.

I call that not having anything to do with the legal process.

61 posted on 03/20/2005 6:29:06 PM PST by Howlin
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To: andie74
None of this makes sense to me. I don't understand why he doesn't let the parents take care of her. If, as he says, he was doing this for Terri, why can't he take comfort in knowing he did all he could do. Why such persistence to remove the feeding tube for so long when her parents want to take care of her? If this happened to me and I didn't have anything in writing, I would hope my husband would consider my parents/children's feelings, for their sake, not mine or just his.

If he divorces her, does he lose some of the settlement money in a property settlement?

I just don't understand this guy. He says one thing, but his actions say something else, at least to me.
62 posted on 03/20/2005 6:29:18 PM PST by jennyjenny
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To: annalex
Mr. Schiavo may be a misguided creep, or he may be a lying creep.

I see him as a lying creep. JMO.

63 posted on 03/20/2005 6:29:27 PM PST by LisaMalia (Today is the first day...of the rest of our lives.....)
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To: ClintonBeGone

Let's also not forget that MS's lawyer is a euthanasia nut.

Talk about a conflict of interest.


64 posted on 03/20/2005 6:31:27 PM PST by GOP_Proud (Those who proclaim tolerance have the least for my views.)
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To: muawiyah

I heard that only HIS relatives not hers are saying that Terri said she wouldn't want to live this way. It's strange that he holding onto all that money AND his relatives heard her say that. Why didn't they speak up before the courts awarded Michael the money to take care of the wife he said he wanted to take care of until he died. Could there be financial motive on more than one persons part? Disgusting!


65 posted on 03/20/2005 6:31:33 PM PST by outofhere2
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To: Former Military Chick

"I try to always be fair and listen and frankly in the end we may disagree but we do so based on an intellectual and respectful discussion"

I would like to say, FMC, that I have supported you (in my own way) in the past and I couldn't agree more, in a sense, but I also know that Terri's husband hasn't done didly squat to help her.

It just makes me so sad.


66 posted on 03/20/2005 6:31:42 PM PST by proud American in Canada
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To: jennyjenny

I was explaining this to my daughter, and the first words out of her mouth were, "Seimei hoken." Life insurance.

Has anybody checked into the existence of a policy that would give Schiavo a nice little nest egg if she dies?


67 posted on 03/20/2005 6:31:47 PM PST by dsc
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To: marvlus
That's you. This is Terri. She's not a vegetable. She has no written will stating a desire to die if disabled.
68 posted on 03/20/2005 6:32:15 PM PST by Lexinom (You can easily judge the character of a man by how he treats those who can do nothing for him.)
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To: Former Military Chick

Endangered tree frogs and sea turtles have more federal recourse to be 'heard' in the system then this disabled woman...where is the wisdom of Solomon?


69 posted on 03/20/2005 6:32:15 PM PST by kjenerette (Jenerette for Senate - www.jenerette.com - U.S. Army Desert Storm)
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To: Howlin
You know, it's embarassing to see Freepers calling somebody a murderer with absolutely no proof.

Michael Schiavo withheld medical records from the parents of Terri for 10 years. Terri has some broken bones that are very hard to explain.

Terri is able to talk -- though one source says it is only a way of saying "yes" or "no".

I have to go by the Bible on this one -- "only a good tree produces good fruit, a bad tree produces bad fruit".

Michael was entrusted with $2 million for the care of Terri [results of several lawsuits]. Very little has been spent on Terri after he won the $1 million lawsuit.

Michael has spent large sums of money with the "right to die" lawyer. Why? Seems like you might want to err on the side of life.

Finally, if Terri gets better and is able to communicate, what might she say. Is there something Michael is afraid Terri will say?

The judge in this case is breaking the law by being the presiding judge and guardian of Terri -- it is against Florida law.

So there are a lot of irregularities.

Why does Michael want to cremate the body immediately on death>?

Will an autopsy disclose something?

70 posted on 03/20/2005 6:33:07 PM PST by topher (Pray for our leaders -- Pray for Justice for Terri Schiavo -- let her live!)
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To: Howlin
All of this is crap, anyway. Even if, by some miracle, evidence were to surface that MS attempted murder, he would NOT be charged or convicted of same.

After the pronouncments of Tom DeLay and Bill Frist regarding him, the entire jury pool is tainted beyond repair.

Of course, there is not now and never has been any such evidence, so those hoping against hop efor it to come from a brain-damaged woman who "wakes up" are to put it mildly, pi$$ing in the wind.

71 posted on 03/20/2005 6:33:15 PM PST by Long Cut ("Looks like meat's back on the menu, Boys!")
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To: Former Military Chick

Well, I think you're right that we should hear all sides. We must also judge what we hear from them on the various merits, motivations, and perspectives. I haven't followed this case as closely as some Freepers, so I'm not going to judge any of the players.

I will say that I find it very difficult to accept what is going on today from a societal standpoint. A just people doesn't starve people to death. We treat condemned prisoners better and we'd charge someone who treated an animal this way with a felony.


72 posted on 03/20/2005 6:33:35 PM PST by No Longer Free State (The last thing Reuters wants is a free and unfettered Iraqi press)
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To: marvlus

I would rather have gone to heaven 15 years ago, then to remain in a persistent vegetative state.

Which is part of the wrongful propaganda put out by Mikey and the hurry-up-and-die-cause-you-are-creeping-us-out Dinasour Media crowd. She is NOT in a persistent vegetative state. She is mentally handicapped state but not vegetative.


73 posted on 03/20/2005 6:34:00 PM PST by MNJohnnie (Next up, US Senate. 60 in 06!)
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To: ElkGroveDan

That was funny. Is Number 2 Robert Blake? Man, age has not been kind to him, has it? Plus, what's with the expression on his face? Schiavo's an Italian name, but he looks a little German! Northern boy, I guess. We Central/Southern Italians call boys like him POLENTONE! 'Cause their enarmored with polenta.


74 posted on 03/20/2005 6:34:16 PM PST by AlbionGirl
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To: LisaMalia

Yes. In order to assume that he faithfully (albeit still murderously) executes his promise to Terri, we need to explain why he broke his marital vows to the same woman, and why did he recall that 7 years down the road.

Yet, the article says some people think different. In my opinion, their testimony is full of holes.


75 posted on 03/20/2005 6:34:21 PM PST by annalex
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To: Jewels1091

I hope he isn't able to collect or spend one dime of Terri's insurance money!!!!!!!!


76 posted on 03/20/2005 6:34:27 PM PST by LittleBoPeep
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To: Howlin
BTW, this is a good point (for the general argument), but my question to answer before we even got to that was did the doctors mount a defense or did the insurance company simply make a settlement?

A couple of mil is chump change in a malpractice case, particularly where the charge was that the doctors overlooked bulimia.

77 posted on 03/20/2005 6:34:42 PM PST by muawiyah
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To: Former Military Chick
Schiavo continues to abuse his wife as if she were chattel to be disposed of when her usefulness to him is no longer desired.

I do not see compassion in his heart for her plight for if he did possess on ounce of humane feeling he'd never kick Terry's family out of her hospice room. He'd never not want her to receive food and water.

And, most of all he would have let her parents who genuinely love their daughter see to her needs.

I'm sure he is striving for sympathy for his actions and justification for demanding she die in such a brutal and barbaric manner.

78 posted on 03/20/2005 6:34:48 PM PST by harpo11
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To: GOP_Proud

Also, what's the harm of an open window, or pushing her outside on a beautiful day? Even if his belief is that she will die tomorrow, what harm is that? He dienies her even the simplist of things.

There's a reason. He does not want her to get better. Why? (that's rhetorical)


79 posted on 03/20/2005 6:35:34 PM PST by GOP_Proud (Those who proclaim tolerance have the least for my views.)
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To: Long Cut

Of course, there is not now and never has been any such evidence, so those hoping against hop efor it to come from a brain-damaged woman who "wakes up" are to put it mildly, pi$$ing in the wind


Your grasp of medical reality is sadly lacking. Things that killed 10-15 years can be treated now. We have NO idea what the future can bring. Where there is life, there is hope. The Parents are willing to take up the burden of hope. What is it that makes you people so desperate to kill this woman?


80 posted on 03/20/2005 6:36:55 PM PST by MNJohnnie (Next up, US Senate. 60 in 06!)
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