[cmsgop]

Pingoroonie!

[Pearls Before Swine]

This guy's been called dead nearly as many times as Osama. The best way for a cleric sympathizer to buy him time would be to claim he was dead and secretly buried.

[Spunky]

Here we go again.

DEAD! ALIVE! DEAD! ALIVE! DEAD!

[Popman]

Can you say "disinformation" ?

[caisson71]

"Show me the BODY" or stay out of the way.

[Echo Talon]

Good Friday? :D

[Dustbunny]

IRAQ: FALLUJAH SHEIKH SAYS AL-ZARQAWI DIED ON FRIDAY

I'll believe that when they produce his body and a DNA test is done.

[Normal4me]

Ahem....I'll wait till his next internet message telling us of his demise before I believe it. Still praying though!!! ;-)

[Flavius]

MORTICIAN: Bring out your dead!

Bring out your dead! [clang] Bring out your dead! [clang] Bring out your dead! [clang] Bring out your dead! [clang] Bring out your dead! CUSTOMER: Here's one -- nine pence.

DEAD PERSON: I'm not dead!

MORTICIAN: What?

CUSTOMER: Nothing -- here's your nine pence.

DEAD PERSON: I'm not dead!

MORTICIAN: Here -- he says he's not dead!

CUSTOMER: Yes, he is.

DEAD PERSON: I'm not!

MORTICIAN: He isn't.

CUSTOMER: Well, he will be soon, he's very ill.

DEAD PERSON: I'm getting better!

CUSTOMER: No, you're not -- you'll be stone dead in a moment.

MORTICIAN: Oh, I can't take him like that -- it's against regulations.

DEAD PERSON: I don't want to go on the cart!

CUSTOMER: Oh, don't be such a baby.

MORTICIAN: I can't take him...

DEAD PERSON: I feel fine!

CUSTOMER: Oh, do us a favor...

MORTICIAN: I can't.

CUSTOMER: Well, can you hang around a couple of minutes? He won't be long.

MORTICIAN: Naaah, I got to go on to Robinson's -- they've lost nine today.

CUSTOMER: Well, when is your next round?

MORTICIAN: Thursday.

DEAD PERSON: I think I'll go for a walk.

CUSTOMER: You're not fooling anyone y'know. Look, isn't there something you can do?

DEAD PERSON: I feel happy... I feel happy.

[whop] CUSTOMER: Ah, thanks very much.

MORTICIAN: Not at all. See you on Thursday.

CUSTOMER: Right.

[clop clop]

MORTICIAN: Who's that then?

CUSTOMER: I don't know.

MORTICIAN: Must be a king.

CUSTOMER: Why?

MORTICIAN: He hasn't got sh.t all over him.

[alloysteel]

Find the grave, exhume the body and run DNA tests or whatever other tests deemed necessary, or even possible, to ascertain the identity, and upon determining it is really al-Zarqawi, decapitate the corpse, and display the head on a pike.

I realize this is a most extraordinary treatment of a corpse, but in light of the extreme and ruthless cruelty that has been attributed to al-Zarqawi, this Old Testament form of retribution is fully justified, and would have a most telling effect on all the would-be jihadists.

[Tacis]

... and, his body was sprinkled with bacon bits and eaten by dogs!

[Harmless Teddy Bear]

The Jordanian militant Abu Musab al-Zarqawi - al-Qaeda's leader in Iraq - died on Friday and his body is in Fallujah's cemetary, an Iraqi Sunni sheikh, Ammar Abdel Rahim Nasir, has told the Saudi on-line newspaper Al-Medina.

Bring us his head on a pike as proof or we will start a rumor that he shaved his beard and put on a frilly pink dress before running away like a turpentined monkey.

[golfisnr1]

Its Friday and time for another Zarquari death story.

[Leo Carpathian]

the right to announce his death should be left to the al-Qaeda leadership in Afghanistan and Osama bin Laden

Huh? What al-Qaqa leadership in Afghanistan?

[Trueblackman]

AGAIN!!!

[Ditter]

Oh sure, I know he SAYS he's dead, but you know how he lies.

[John Jorsett]

Are we sure it wasn't one of his thousands of senior aides and lieutenants?

[RightOnTheLeftCoast]

[snip]

> He said the two doctors had
> stopped a serious haemorrhage in al-Zarqawi's intestines

[snip]



Gutshot. Very good. Sucked to be him, if true.

The only way this would be better would be if it were bin Laden himself.

--S.

[Casaubon]

FREEP PHOTOSHOP CHALLENGE!!!

"I'm not dead yet" from monty python comes to mind.
or the "its just a flesh wound"

I cant help but find comedy in this story.

[woofie]

How dead is he?