Skip to comments.Mark Steyn: Tales from Dark Side don't live up to hype
Posted on 06/05/2005 2:32:11 AM PDT by mal
One by one, the landmark epics of the 1970s are tying up the loose ends -- alas, not always in ways that quite support the great mythic power invested in them. In ''Revenge of the Sith,'' George Lucas brings the ''Star Wars'' cycle to a close by revealing how Anakin Skywalker went over to the Dark Side, transformed himself into Darth Vader, destroyed the Republic and consigned it to the mad imperial ambitions of Chancellor Palpatine -- all because, er, he was a bit worried his beloved Senator Padme might die in childbirth. If Senator Padme had been like Senator Rodham and had a socialized health care reform bill ready to roll, history might have been very different.
(Excerpt) Read more at suntimes.com ...
Excellent, as always. But I was sort of expecting a movie review!
I saw the movie yesterday. I couldn't get into it. Lucas et al make no attempt at honest science fiction. The rules of good SF require some consistency with science or at least common sense. Later in the movie, there is a scenr where two main characters are having surgery using super sophisticated surgical robots. Both patients scream in pain during the procedure because apparently they didn't discovered anasthesia before conquering faster-than-light travel. They fight six inches above a lake of molten lava without sweating. Missiles in a vacuum use fins to turn, but a finless crippled space ship shaped like a bullet is able to land without power by "pulling up" in atmosphere.
The whole reason for Anakin turning to the dark side doesn't make sense. The shots at the bush administration were blatant too. (Skywalker: "If your not with us, you're our enemy" Response: "Only a Sith speaks in absolutes"
"Both patients scream in pain during the procedure because apparently they didn't discovered anasthesia before conquering faster-than-light travel."
Oh dear. I guess that explains why he was so worried about the wife. I'm not a big sci fi person, but I will always remember the real excitement of seeing the first Star Wars movie, it was like nothing else before it. One sequel would have been enough I'm afraid.
This was just a bad story. With bad dialog ....... just like I had by the shores of Lake Naboo.... blech!
He's done one of those, too. It's really savage and funny. I've forgotten where I read it -- try steynonline.
"With bad dialog ....... just like I had by the shores of Lake Naboo.... blech!"
The reviewer for The New Yorker (I think it was Anthony Lane, not sure, but he's the only one they've got who can really do a good pan) just flamed this movie to death. He too complained of the bad dialoge and made the point that it is really important to be able to make up good names for things if you're going to create whole universes, and Lucas fails in that. "Sith" he particularly complained about and for good reason imho.
He also totally trashed Yoda, called for his destruction. It was just funny as heck to read. Best review I've read in that mag for quite a while. But that's me, nothing I like better than a well deserved and well delivered pan.
I'll have to look for Steyn's. He can be cutting better than anyone, he even tops John Simon, he's devoid of bitterness and filled with evil glee when he gives 'em "what for" as Grandma used to say.
I'll stick with the ORIGIONAL "Twilight Zone."
An often effective technique for destroying the target. It is illegal for a reason.
"I'll stick with the ORIGIONAL "Twilight Zone."
Rod Serling RULES!
I recall hating the end of the first movie and have avoided the rest.
A space age society and the princess comes out of a cave on a mountain side to wave at her supporters standing in the dirt?
"I recall hating the end of the first movie and have avoided the rest."
But have you watched "Spaceballs", Mel Brooks' spoof of Star Wars? If you like silly things you might enjoy it. It's a tad dated, but in a way that makes it a period piece. Joan Rivers as the lady C3PO is pretty good, Dot Matrix is her name.
My kid loves this movie so I've seen it about 1000 times.
Thanks for the link, it was worth reading again. Here's a good bit "The general opinion of Revenge of the Sith seems to be that it marks a distinct improvement on the last two episodes, The Phantom Menace and Attack of the Clones. True, but only in the same way that dying from natural causes is preferable to crucifixion."
LOL, he HATED it.
I'll have to try posting/linking some stuff from The New Yorker. I've never checked out their site, they are such disgusting libs, but the subscription is a gift from my boss (bit of a political joke between us) so I enjoy the parts I enjoy and leave the rest. But it might be fun to subject them to some freeperizing.
And the reviews and stuff can be very good, as Mr. Lane so amply demonstrates here. I guess that bit of "I love you" "No, I love YOU" dialoge is a real howler, as I've seen it highlighted in several reviews.
Very nice post. You might enjoy this site:
It's called date coincidence -- a valid investigatory principle.
Must admit the New Yorker is one of my favorite "waiting room" magazines - I'd never buy it, but some of those famous cartoons are really clever.
"I'm surrounded by a$$holes!"
"Why Yoda, the Jedi master, the incredibly old and wisest creature in the known universe has never learned to put the subject and verb at the beginning of a sentence is a dark side mystery to me."
Read the review p.o.e. links in post #14, there's some bad language, but I think you'll find it sympathetic to your views.
Whoever says, "Only a Sith speaks in absolutes," must also be a Sith because they are speaking in absolutes.
I'm a huge fan of the original Twilight Zone and original Outer Limits, but I'll always have a soft spot for Tales from the Darkside :)
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.