If this were my son, I would have a simple graveside service at 12:01 am on 7/4. Never let the freaks have the last word.
I would never let freaks like this have any influence on any aspect of life or death. Cept maybe their own.
Why should you have to? Every family should be entitled to bury their loved ones without some horrible group invading the funeral.
I realize you were probably saying "if I had no choice" but I still think this group is a horrible witness for Christ.