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An older dad...
Posted on 10/18/2006 12:22:59 PM PDT by Da_Shrimp
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To: Da_Shrimp
I think you have more patience at that age and react to things in a more laid back way. I don't think your age will be any problem in keeping up with the darling. My experience was that things that might have seemed like a crisis when I was younger actually became quite humorous.
Relax and enjoy!
To: Da_Shrimp
Congrats. My wife and I became parents when we were 43. We weren't suppose to have children. (So much for modern science.) A lot depends on how old your wife is. If she is substantially younger it will be easier. Here are a few things we've experienced.
We've always felt like odd ducks at PTA meetings and get together simply because most of my son's friends' moms and dads are about 15 years younger. Few parents are our age. People are always talking about their children in college while you'll be talking about yours in preschool. They want to talk about heading off to some exotic vacation and you'll be talking about going to Michigan.
You're probably more financially secure than most parents your child's age which helps you when they wish to take piano lessons or want the latest video game (try not to spoil).
While in your forties you feel like you can keep up. When you get into your mid-fifties they are just becoming a teenager and all that baggage. We have a wonderful son but at time.... Also, in your mid-fifties the old brains cells are starting to deteriorate and when they need help with Algebra or learning German, it can be difficult helping them with their homework. Thanks goodness for the Internet.
They will want to stay out or have sleepovers staying up until 2 am. You will want to go to bed at 9.
Just about the time you will want to retire, they will be heading off to college. We are planning to delay our retirement by about 3 years to get him through his undergrad degree.
Children are a great blessings but they are a lot of work. We wouldn't trade this experience but it would be very difficult to have had another child simply because we really wouldn't have had the stamina.
Since we were both along in our careers and couldn't give them up because of retirement, we made a decision to spend every moment we could with our son. In thirteen years (with the exception of day care while we were working) he has only had a baby sitter 1 time and that was an emergency. It was the right decision. I like to think our child is such a great kid because we've spent so much time with him.
62
posted on
10/18/2006 1:00:50 PM PDT
by
HarleyD
To: Da_Shrimp
I became a dad for the first and only time at 48. I was scared to death, especially financially.
Everyone told me that babies bring luck, and it was true. The finances have worked themselves out, because somehow, with God's help, my consulting business really began taking off after a lot of lean years.
My daughter is the best thing that ever happened to me.
I can't believe I almost missed out entirely on fatherhood. If I were 44 when she was born, we would definitely have had another. Sad, but still I am grateful for the joy of being Daddy.
Being the dad of a toddler at age 50 was physically more challenging and draining than it would have been in my 20s or 30s. But somehow, the patience and wisdom that come with being 50 makes up for it. Also, at my age now (mid-50s), I am more focused on my family than my career, which would not have been the case 15 years ago.
Congratulations. You're a lucky man.
63
posted on
10/18/2006 1:03:52 PM PDT
by
Maceman
(This is America. Why must we press "1" for English?)
To: Da_Shrimp
Congratulations! As a mother of four children, my suggestion to you is only this; cherish every single moment because it will fly by and be gone before you know it.
Best wishes, FRiend.
To: Da_Shrimp
I remember when my first child was born. My father told me, son, you had your last night of peaceful sleep.
Don't want to alarm you, however what my father said was very true and, I'm lucky, all three are wonderful children who love their parents very much.
65
posted on
10/18/2006 1:04:39 PM PDT
by
buck61
To: Da_Shrimp
Congrats....we had our twin boys when I was 38. Every phase has been a joy. Like most things in life, you can deal with the demands simply through attitude. All the best!
66
posted on
10/18/2006 1:05:51 PM PDT
by
Lando Lincoln
(For what cause would a liberal go to war? Revolutions don't count.)
To: Da_Shrimp
I have to say this to all the wonderful men on this thread... If this world had more men like you we most certainly would have far far far fewer of the problems we have been seeing in the news lately.
God bless you all and you sure gave me some smiles today. Thanks. :)
67
posted on
10/18/2006 1:06:48 PM PDT
by
dha
(The safest place to be is within the will of God.)
To: Da_Shrimp
Don't listen to all the scare stories of not sleeping. I never saw the need to wake hubby in the middle of the night since I was nursing. He is only woken on request due to bad dream or illness, it is amazing what he can sleep through!!! Have fun and take lots of pictures. Everyone takes lots of pictures the first couple of months, but then stop. Don't stop!
Buy lots of night lights. I found them to be much better for me than to have to turn on lights. It even made it easier for me to fall asleep. Oh and, NEVER wake a sleeping baby. :)
Prayers for a healthy baby and delivery.
68
posted on
10/18/2006 1:07:47 PM PDT
by
WV Mountain Mama
(Mohammad was a pedophile. Islam is a cult.)
To: Da_Shrimp
The handsome and talented Mr. Redhead was 42 when his son was born. My father, on the other hand, was 61 when my little sister was born. (Mom was 43...)
69
posted on
10/18/2006 1:09:02 PM PDT
by
redhead
(Valley Trash: The beer of champions!)
To: Southside_Chicago_Republican
"I gagged the first time I changed a diaper. "
LOL My husband never overcame that! He can't scoop a catbox either!! But he had the wonderful talent of getting the kids all cuddled up next to him, he'd softly hum and off to sleepytown they went!
70
posted on
10/18/2006 1:09:29 PM PDT
by
swmobuffalo
(The only good terrorist is a dead terrorist.)
To: Da_Shrimp
Had my first son at 19. He is 27 now. The best part of my age now... is
his child that I now have the time to enjoy and spend lots of time with. While young you don't always know how to smell the roses.
http://www.youtube.com/profile?user=Badpacifist
71
posted on
10/18/2006 1:10:52 PM PDT
by
badpacifist
(As long as you are above ground you can still get it right)
To: swmobuffalo; Southside_Chicago_Republican
I gagged the first time I changed a diaperYes, I can't say I'm looking forward to changing nappies (diapers as you call them), I too gag at cat trays! Oh well, perserverance is all, I guess!
To: Da_Shrimp
Congratulations...
Best advice I can give. Love your baby's Mother forever.
73
posted on
10/18/2006 1:14:33 PM PDT
by
TASMANIANRED
(The Internet is the samizdat of liberty..)
To: Da_Shrimp
My brother was 42 when my nephew was born in June of 2005.
He is absolutely head-over-heels nuts in love with that kid.
He's never been happier.
Congrats.
To: Da_Shrimp; Tax-chick
75
posted on
10/18/2006 1:14:52 PM PDT
by
fanfan
("We don't start fights my friends, but we finish them, and never leave until our work is done."PMSH)
To: Apple Blossom; Da_Shrimp
You're about to learn that 4 hours IS a good nights' sleep!I guess we were lucky with our daughter. She turns 21 next month, and there were few nights we didn't get 7 or 8 hours of sleep.
I noticed several other posters talking about short nights, and I now consider my wife and myself very lucky.
76
posted on
10/18/2006 1:17:33 PM PDT
by
Arrowhead1952
(Friends don't let friends vote for RATS.)
To: Da_Shrimp
My youngest was born when I was 50. No problem if you have a younger wife. And by the way I am a lot better Dad now than when I was 28!
77
posted on
10/18/2006 1:17:52 PM PDT
by
pankot
To: Da_Shrimp
My Father was 59 when I was born, and he handled it beautifully. Having helped raise a number of siblings after his Dad died no doubt helped, but an older parent can be more unflappable. I always felt kind of sorry for my contemporaries who seemed to have kids for parents, themselves.
78
posted on
10/18/2006 1:18:42 PM PDT
by
backhoe
To: Da_Shrimp
Seriously, you have to step up now. Don't go schizoid on your wife by announcing you are "self-employed" now. Put her on a pedestal and support her efforts to be a good mom. If you fail to be her protection and support (material and spiritual) you will never recover her respect.
79
posted on
10/18/2006 1:19:56 PM PDT
by
Havisham
To: dha; Da_Shrimp
If this world had more men like you we most certainly would have far far far fewer of the problems we have been seeing in the news lately.I have to echo this statement. It does my heart good to hear dads talk about how rewarding fatherhood has been for them. I'm sure you can tell from all the responses...parents of any age LOVE talking about their kids!
I'm sure most families are 50/50 on this, but my daughter was sleeping through the night at 6 weeks old. You may get one of those babies and most babies sleep through the night once they weigh 13 pounds, so you may have to wait a little while.
80
posted on
10/18/2006 1:25:07 PM PDT
by
Apple Blossom
(...around here, city hall is something of a between meals snack.)
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