Posted on 11/18/2006 9:56:19 AM PST by DogByte6RER
WEIRD BUT TRUE By MARSHA KRANES and Wire Services November 18, 2006 -- Why was the turkey crossing the road? That's what Steven Lapre of Springfield, Vt., would like to know. He's been charged with deliberately running over the turkey - on his way to an anger management class.
(Excerpt) Read more at nypost.com ...
So he was going to anger management class...hmmmmmm, maybe he needs to watch Adam Sandler's movie 'Anger Management' and then he can listen to this little Thanksgiving ditty by Adam Sandler:
"The Thanksgiving Song"
"They wanna hear the thanksgiving song! All right.."
"This is uhh, This is the Thanksgiving Song"
"I hope you enjoy it."
[Starts playing]
Love to eat turkey
Love to eat turkey
[Shout from Crowd:] "I love you Adam!"
[Adam Sandler:] "Ohhh, I love you!"
Love to eat turkey
'Cause it's good
Love to eat turkey
Like a good boy should
'Cause it's turkey to eat
So good
[Adam Sandler:] "That clappin's messing my head up man. I appreciate it.
But I was trying to think of the next line and all I hear is clapping.
Here we go... Thanks anyways"
Turkey for me
Turkey for you
Let's eat the turkey
In my big brown shoe
Love to eat the turkey
At the table
I once saw a movie
With Betty Grable
Eat that turkey
All night long
Fifty million Elvis fans
Can't be wrong
Turkey lurkey doo and
Turkey lurkey dap
I eat that turkey
Then I take a nap
Thanksgiving is a special night
Jimmy Walker used to say Dynomite
That's right
Turkey with gravy and cranberry
Can't believe the Mets traded Darryl Strawberry
Turkey for you and
Turkey for me
Can't believe Tyson
Gave that girl V.D.
White meat, dark meat
You just can't lose
I fell off my moped
And I got a bruise
Turkey in the oven
And the buns in the toaster
I'll never take down
My Cheryl Tiegs poster
Wrap the turkey up
In aluminum foil
My brother likes to masturbate
With baby oil
Turkey and sweet potato pie
Sammy Davis Jr.
Only had one eye
Turkey for the girls and
Turkey for the boys
My favorite kind of pants
Are corduroys
Gobble gobble goo and
Gobble gobble gickel
I wish turkey
Only cost a nickel
Oh I love turkey on Thanksgiving
Happy Thanksgiving everybody!
I wish this guy would move to Massachusetts. There are some turkeys there, mostly in Congress.
They will fly when in the road if a car comes to close so he had to have really had pedal to the metal. I have wild turkeys all over the place. They can fly quite high in fact as they roost in the big pines.
"They will fly when in the road if a car comes to close so he had to have really had pedal to the metal. I have wild turkeys all over the place. They can fly quite high in fact as they roost in the big pines."
Apparently the turkeys in Kansas think they own the road as I've had to slow down to almost nothing while driving through a lot of them.
I was driving home from work one morning. Kenoza Street in Haverhill, a rather wooded area and there were 8 Turkey's sitting in the road, birds not Moonbats attending Northern Essex CC, my F-350 had big fat tires, the rest is history.
Was it a wild turkey or a farm-raised turkey? If the latter, it *might* have been too heavy to fly. I'm inclined to think it was the latter -- the farmer is pressing charges?
Well, it's Vermont -- I suppose it could be environmentalists pressing charges...but if you can just shoot a wild turkey you ought to be able to run one over.
Hmmm...if there's a "turkey crossing" sign or something then I can see pressing charges even if it's legal to shoot wild turkey.
"Was it a wild turkey or a farm-raised turkey? If the latter, it *might* have been too heavy to fly. I'm inclined to think it was the latter -- the farmer is pressing charges?
Well, it's Vermont -- I suppose it could be environmentalists pressing charges...but if you can just shoot a wild turkey you ought to be able to run one over.
Hmmm...if there's a "turkey crossing" sign or something then I can see pressing charges even if it's legal to shoot wild turkey."
Wild turkeys.........
Only during turkey hunting season can you shoot one.
Farm raised turkeys are normally behind fencing and too fat to do anything but prepare for the oven unless free range and a pet.
Wild turkeys in New England are brown and thinner, but can get quite large and over the past several years have really multiplied in population. They fly to safety to avoid predators and can run quite fast.
If the farmer is pressing charges then had to be the fat white ones but are generally "chicken fenced in". It's those guinea hens that come out into the road and don't move!
Still you don't go running down anything..because you can. Sounds like the driver has some emotional issues and this is his form of "country" road rage.
Maybe the turkey killer could be released to run down some country back road and this farmer could go after him with the John Deere to see how he likes it. Little country Justice.
I actually get that. poor old Les.
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