Mark Steyn: A lame joke becomes reality

OC Register ^ | 10 june 07 | Mark Steyn

[rellimpank]

I don't know whether this sham of an immigration bill is dead or just resting "in the shadows" like a fine upstanding member of the Vampiric-American community

About five years or so back, I started making references in columns to "fine upstanding members of the Undocumented-American community." But from the lame Steyn joke of yesteryear to the reality of tomorrow is a mere hop and a skip. A few days ago, Harry Reid, the Senate majority leader, declared:

"This week we will vote on cloture and final passage of a comprehensive bill that will strengthen border security, bring the 12 million undocumented Americans out of the shadows, and keep our economy strong."

Talk about "a fast track to citizenship"! Never mind probationary visas, Z-visas and Green Cards, in the eyes of the Democrat steering "comprehensive immigration reform" through Congress these guys are already "undocumented Americans." Was it simply a slip of the tongue? Or did Senator Reid mean it?

[Tax-chick]

... from the lame Steyn joke of yesteryear to the reality of tomorrow is a mere hop and a skip.

Isn't that the truth! There's no room for satire in this insane world.

[knighthawk]

Ping

[siunevada]

the truth is that America's immigration bureaucracy cannot cope with its existing caseload, and thus will certainly be unable to cope with millions of additional teeming hordes tossed into its waiting room.

But, but...our new and yet-to-be designed computer system will keep track of everyone! Trust us! It's modern and elec-tronic! It can't be beat!

The emperor has no clothes.

[Pete]

Even writing about such a serious and disturbing issue, Steyn can make me laugh outloud.

[raybbr]

Watch the video of Reid here.

[Wonder Warthog]

"...in the eyes of the Democrat steering "comprehensive immigration reform" through Congress these guys are already "undocumented Americans." Was it simply a slip of the tongue? Or did Senator Reid mean it?"

Yes, Reid meant it--but it's really to be understood as "undocumented Democrats". Too bad Jorge Arbusto doesn't understand that reality.

[Savage Beast]

Bush tried to pull a fast one on the American people. Because Middle America trusted this cloWn, he damn near pulled it off. He might yet.

Yes. The price of liberty is truly eternal vigilance.

We, the people, must NEVER make such a mistake as this again.

It is no excuse; we ourselves are to blame for trusting the untrustworthy, but the red/blue culture divide did distract Americans, on both sides of it, and blinded us to the fact that the politicians in Washington were at best stupid and at worst deceitful and consequently allowed a serious problem to become a dangerous crisis.

[Kid Shelleen]

Does anybody know if the immigration reform bill has a provision to phase out bi-lingual ballots? It seems that bi-lingual ballots will not be necessary since it will take years for an immigrant to become a citizen.
That should be sufficient time to learn English.

[raybbr]

Does anybody know if the immigration reform bill has a provision to phase out bi-lingual ballots? It seems that bi-lingual ballots will not be necessary since it will take years for an immigrant to become a citizen.

Quite the opposite. In research I've read it requires that local authorities provide assistance in their native language during the entire "legalization" process.

[ClaireSolt]

And that will be done by the same folks wou spent 95 million on a computer system for the IRS and then junked it because they couldn’t make it work. Then they moved on to the FBI which still doesn’t have email, as best I can tell.

[raybbr]

From one of grey_whiskers' posts:

SEC. 218. STATE CRIMINAL ALIEN ASSISTANCE PROGRAM.

(a) Reimbursement for Costs Associated With Processing Criminal Illegal Aliens- The Secretary shall reimburse States and units of local government for costs associated with processing undocumented criminal aliens through the criminal justice system, including--

(1) indigent defense;

(2) criminal prosecution;

(3) autopsies;

(4) translators and interpreters; and

(5) courts costs.

(b) Authorization of Appropriations-

(1) PROCESSING CRIMINAL ILLEGAL ALIENS- There are authorized to be appropriated $400,000,000 for each of the fiscal years 2008 through 2012 to carry out subsection (a).

(2) COMPENSATION UPON REQUEST- Section 241(i)(5) (8 U.S.C.

1231(i)) is amended to read as follows:

`(5) There are authorized to be appropriated to carry this subsection--

`(A) such sums as may be necessary for fiscal year 2008;

`(B) $750,000,000 for fiscal year 2009;

`(C) $850,000,000 for fiscal year 2010; and

`(D) $950,000,000 for each of the fiscal years 2011 and

2012.'.

(c) Technical Amendment- Section 501 of the Immigration Reform and Control Act of 1986 (8 U.S.C. 1365) is amended by striking `Attorney General' each place it appears and inserting `Secretary of Homeland Security'.

Got that? That is for ALL costs, including defense, prosecution, autopsies, translators, interpreters, court costs.

[raybbr]

MORE:

By contrast, section 643 mentions training in English for those who want to become citizens.

"SEC. 643. STRENGTHENING AMERICAN CITIZENSHIP.
(a) Short Title- This section may be cited as the `Strengthening American Citizenship Act of 2007'.
(b) Definition- In this section, the term `Oath of Allegiance' means the binding oath (or affirmation) of allegiance required to be naturalized as a citizen of the United States, as prescribed in section 337(e) of the Immigration and Nationality Act, as added by subsection (h)(1)(B).
(c) English Fluency-
(1) EDUCATION GRANTS-
(A) ESTABLISHMENT- The Chief of the Office of Citizenship of the Department (referred to in this paragraph as the `Chief') shall establish a grant program to provide grants in an amount not to exceed $500 to assist legal residents of the United States who declare an intent to apply for citizenship in the United States to meet the requirements under section 312 of the Immigration and Nationality Act (8 U.S.C. 1423).
(B) USE OF FUNDS- Grant funds awarded under this paragraph shall be paid directly to an accredited institution of higher education or other qualified educational institution (as determined by the Chief) for tuition, fees, books, and other educational resources required by a course on the English language in which the legal resident is enrolled."
--OK, so I agree that English fluency is an important step to assimilation. That is good. (Even though to first appearances, it looks like we are trying to help illegals *become citizens* -- which is amnesty.) But $500 per person times (let us hope for the best, that they *all* want to assimilate) 12 million is $6 billion. So they will potentially pay $6 billion to train in English, but less than $1 billion for deportation. This is not "revenue neutral" as I believe the saying goes. How will you pay for this? And who will score and administer the tests of fluency?

[sonic109]

We have to stay on top of this situation. These bums are hell bent on passing an amnesty bill and they will try every underhanded method to make sure it happens. We won the battle but not the war .Watch out July 4th weekend ,they may try to sneak it in while everyone is away on vacation. They will also attach tons of pork to the bill to sway those who at first opposed to it . Ned need a second wave of attack . Lets all call again , write again , fax again , whatever we need to do to kill this bill and KEEP IT DEAD !

[sonic109]

This is the real fraud. They don’t want to be citizens !!!! Who the hell would want citizenship when you can get a Z Visa and live here forever ? All the perks of being a citizen but none of the responsibilities. Lets see if they have a military draft someday , you’ll have 50 million of them jumping back over the wall.

[norton]

"There's no room for satire in this insane world."

There's plenty of room for satire,
but today is is called 'prophesy'.

[Steely Tom]

Lets see if they have a military draft someday , you’ll have 50 million of them jumping back over the wall.

You may have just put your finger on something!

[norton]

'is is' = 'it is'

I hate spell check,
and can't spell.

[Pedrobud]

Beautifully written. I am proud of the thinking American people who got off their fat asses and ordered these self serving morons in congress this bill would be bad for America.
Bush and the Dems tried to sneak this through and I am livid !! I supported Bush up until a month ago and lost all respect for him.
Please remind the timid congress works for us and threaten the bastards job is they try to pull this again. Unfortunately, I believe they will try.

[dforest]

We have to stay on top of this situation. These bums are hell bent on passing an amnesty bill and they will try every underhanded method to make sure it happens. We won the battle but not the war .Watch out July 4th weekend ,they may try to sneak it in while everyone is away on vacation. They will also attach tons of pork to the bill to sway those who at first opposed to it . Ned need a second wave of attack . Lets all call again , write again , fax again , whatever we need to do to kill this bill and KEEP IT DEAD !

Another thing to look for is the next weekend crisis created. Lok for an attempt on Mondays to push this bill while we are all focused on the next crisis that pretty much goes away early in the week.

They plan to make this happen and will try anything to do so.