Roots and Wings: What's Wrong With Kids These Days?

19 January, 2008 | joanie-f

[valkyrieanne]

One thing about the school issue. The Wall Street Journal has this ongoing coverage of the "competitive preschool situation." They also have many articles about prep schools, the difficulty of admission to "elite" private universities, etc.

Most of this coverage has little to do with public schools, unless it's to shill for No Child Left Behind, or to feature the occasional public high school which they think measures up to their standard of achieving the same goal (admission to an "elite" college.)

Because the WSJ has so many wealthy readers, they cover those topics which interest parents who have a deep vested interest in PRIVATE schooling - but not of the type your average homeschooler or Christian/parochial school family is interested in. Nor are the WSJ's values related to home or a nurturing childhood. Their coverage of these private schools often focuses on the intense competition, drilling, pressure, and angst of getting one's kid into "the right preschool" (their article on dragging a two or three year old all over Manhattan to secure admission was hair-curling.)

So IMO this article has to be taken in context of their overall coverage. The WSJ may in some ways be a conservative newspaper, but IMO their slant is really not friendly towards more child-centered, home- and family-centered values.

[philman_36]

There's a whole lot of "we's" that don't apply to me (and I would hope a lot of others as well).
As a responsible parent I recognized the need to teach my children the very things you mention, as the public school system sure wasn't/isn't going to, and I've tried to fill that void myself.
I was satisfied to see it take hold in my daughter and, belatedly, in my son. (he's slowly realizing that Daddy really does know what he's talking about!)

Overall I agree with your views. The education system is going to continue "dumbing down" our kids and there is no cure to be expected from that quarter. As I see it concerned, involved, loving parents and families are the only solution to the woes you've described.

[philman_36]

...when I occasionally come across a gifted student who is not performing up to his or her ability...
You've nailed my son to a tee! For the last two years I've been trying to get him to recognize his own abilities. His grades have always been good and yet I knew that he was capable of so much more. Getting him to stop doubting his own abilities/capabilities has been a major task. He's finally gone proactive at my urging, much to my relief .

Meanwhile the teachers/counselors at his school, who know his sister and who also know she was valedictorian of her class, offered no help/support/advice whatsoever. He was simply another student seat warmer to them. The respect that I once had for their school district has been tarnished because of their careless and "care less" attitude.

[wintertime]

Meanwhile the teachers/counselors at his school, who know his sister and who also know she was valedictorian of her class, offered no help/support/advice whatsoever. He was simply another student seat warmer to them. The respect that I once had for their school district has been tarnished because of their careless and “care less” attitude.

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There can only be ONE valedictorian and usually on a few students winning full or partial scholarships. For these students ( and their parents) government schooling is a very positive experience.

For the rest,,,,well,,,I think you worded it very well!

[wintertime]

As I see it concerned, involved, loving parents and families are the only solution to the woes you’ve described.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

What does “involve” entail?

[wintertime]

The point is, children need sheltered time to be children. There is plenty of time for academics later - IF the child has been nurtured, cared for, allowed to explore and develop at his own pace.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

The homeschooling moms in my area had an expression: “Wait until eight!”

If a child is catching on to reading, spelling, math, or whatever,,,often the best approach is to wait until they are eight years old, and then try again.

[philman_36]

What does “involve” entail?
If you have to ask the price you can't afford it.

[joanie-f]

The point is, children need sheltered time to be children. There is plenty of time for academics later - IF the child has been nurtured, cared for, allowed to explore and develop at his own pace. Too many people dump their kids into all-day preschools as an alternative to day care, and then wonder why the kids have problems.

Amen!

[joanie-f]

So IMO this article has to be taken in context of their overall coverage. The WSJ may in some ways be a conservative newspaper, but IMO their slant is really not friendly towards more child-centered, home- and family-centered values.

Absolutely. One of your most powerful comments here revolved around the fact that parents search high and low, and expend significant energy, attempting to find the right pre-school for their children – presumably one that will provide their three or four-year-old with an educational ‘leg up’ on his contemporaries. Yet I truly believe that a stay-at-home mother recognizes that setting a fulltime example for her young child is the greatest foundation (educational, moral and otherwise) that child can receive. There is no pre-school program in existence that is more nurturing or mentally/emotionally inspiring for a four-year-old than a mother who provides one-on-one example and instruction.

I honestly believe that the reason pre-school is now considered an educational ‘necessity’ boils down to the fact that the term ‘pre-school’ sounds significantly more acceptable than ‘daycare’ – it connotes the idea that the child is receiving an education, rather than simply supervision. But, other than in extreme cases in which both parents actually must work (a much lower percentage than we are led to believe), either one – ‘pre-school’ or ‘daycare’ -- really boils down to the fact that parents choose to have others serve as the primary role model for their four-year-old, simply because those parents believe that their own time is better spent in other pursuits.

~ joanie

[joanie-f]

There's a whole lot of "we's" that don't apply to me (and I would hope a lot of others as well).

When I specified ‘we’ I was referring to American parents in general. I would suspect that most here on FreeRepublic do not fall under the apathetic/negligent parental descriptions I included in this essay (just as I suspect we don’t fall under much else into which the ‘average’ uninformed American has devolved over the past fifty years).

I would have suspected that you have tried to ‘fill the void’ left by the public school system. Your conservative views, and the intelligent, informed nature of your decisions in general, would demand that of you. I am sure you are doing everything you can to make up for what your children are not receiving in their public school education. The even bigger problem (which I am sure you recognize, but most American parents do not) is that our public schools are not only leaving a void -- as in not teaching our children the basics that used to be considered part of a well-rounded education: the ability to read and write well, a good knowledge of basic math and science, an appreciation of art and music, and a sense of their ancestral/historic roots -- but they are also systematically indoctrinating our children with ideas that are anti-American, anti-individual liberty, anti-Christian, and self-destructive.

I couldn’t agree more that concerned, involved, loving parents are the solution to this problem (just as concerned, involved citizens are the solution to the rampant deceit and corruption in our government). Trouble is, concerned, involved parents/citizens are on the decline. You and I may be doing all that we can to see to it that our children are educated and our republic remains strong, but the ‘average American’ is not.

As a result, no matter our individual efforts, our children are finding themselves surrounded by contemporaries who don’t value education, don’t understand or appreciate their ancestry, don’t understand the responsibilities inherent in citizenship in a free society, and don’t give a damn about what they are lacking – which is precisely why two completely unqualified people, who have no respect for the principles of liberty and self-reliance upon which our republic was founded, now stand as the front-runners to become leaders of the free world.

~ joanie
Allegiance and Duty Betrayed

[Squantos]

Great read Joanie !!

.......we are up too our hips in good kids around here. I have a coworker who told me a tale the other day about his son that wants to go on the rodeo circuit and be a bull rider etc .......He’s a awesome young man. He made a deal with a local rancher to get up every morning for a calender year and help that rancher feed and water his horses and he could pick a new colt from the lot of em.......

This kid gets up every morning, 7 days a week, at 0430L and works till 8AM when , during the week, he comes home and gets ready for school where he maintains a straight A grades.

This kid is 10 years old and now has a new colt he’s raising.......:o)

I think there is hope for our future as we have a whole lot of polite, intelligent, motivated kids that seem to get very little press for being good and doing the right thing.

We have our troubles as does all towns but when I see the few bad it is washed away, hidden and overcome by the good.

We need to keep throwing our time, money and praise to the local girls and boys in scouting, sports, tutoring and mentoring etc as much as our schedule allows as these kids are just like we were......just looking for a little recognition, respect an praise when they do the right thing for themselves and others.

We have lots of quotes on signs around the Schools and Scouting Huts etc and the one that seems to be popular on T-Shirts is :

Integrity .....doing the right thing even if no one is watching.

Stay Safe Young Lady !

[philman_36]

...they are also systematically indoctrinating our children with ideas that are anti-American, anti-individual liberty, anti-Christian, and self-destructive.
Too true.
In another similar indoctrination vein one of the biggest wrongs I see going on in public schools is the "advanced classes" concept. All students should be taught at the "advanced" level, as that gives them the best teachers and learning, but it would also mean that a greater number of students don't pass to the next grade level which is "oh so important" to the education establishment.
Furthermore, the "two Americas" diatribe is given legs early on in our children's lives. There are two classes of students..."advanced" and remedial "normal".

...our children are finding themselves surrounded by contemporaries...
LOL...my children have been taught the difference between "friends" and "aquaintances"! As I tell them, "You'll probably never see 95% of the people you graduated with ever again." And using the "screwed up kids" as examples of what not to do helps a lot too.

Thanks for the clarification, and praise, in your reply.

[13Sisters76]

joanie- well done, as usual!

[joanie-f]

We need to keep throwing our time, money and praise to the local girls and boys in scouting, sports, tutoring and mentoring etc as much as our schedule allows as these kids are just like we were......just looking for a little recognition, respect an praise when they do the right thing for themselves and others.

You are so right. It was so uplifting for me to hear about your co-worker’s ten-year-old son. God bless him!

Rick and I know very well a similar young man in our neighborhood. He stops by every few weeks just to chat because he is thirsting for knowledge and (perhaps sometimes to his detriment?) :) he soaks in our ideas and opinions like a sponge.

‘John’ is twenty-one years old, is attending a local campus of Penn State, and is completing his junior year. He is the hardest-working young man I have ever known, as honest as the day is long, and, even in this staunchly conservative area of the country, is something of an aberration.

John’s folks are both what would be called blue-collar workers, work hard, but are not well off financially. Ever since he was twelve years old, John has earned money by purchasing old garden tractors, farm machinery, etc., repairing and refurbishing them, and then selling them for a handsome profit. By doing this, he has earned sufficient money to put himself through his first three years of college. He (and his Dad) also do odd jobs – painting (interior and exterior), small engine repair, moving, lawn work, cutting and splitting firewood, etc.

Yet John is something of a social outcast. Most young women want nothing to do with him, simply because he is somewhat shy, very family-oriented, and does not concern himself with superficialities like wearing expensive name-brand clothing or driving a hot car.

My point in sharing all of this is that young men like John, or your friend’s obviously similarly-oriented son, are not the norm. If and when they marry and start a family, they and their children will find themselves part of an ever-shrinking minority simply because certain other parts of society are not made up of the same hard-working stuff, and yet are procreating at an alarming rate (more often than not without benefit of a two-parent family, and often living off of the government dole).

Add to that the fact that our government’s promises to stop the flow of illegal immigrants into our country amounts to nothing more than lip service and you see before you a portrait of a nation being systematically over-run by succeeding generations that have no knowledge of work ethic, ancestral roots, or those things in life that have genuine and lasting value. A free society cannot long endure when its young citizenry bears no allegiance to our founding principles, is self-oriented, lazy and superficial.

It appears that both you and I are blessed to live in areas of America where the ‘pioneer spirit’ is still alive and well among many of our young people. But I am afraid that isn’t the case across most of America. And our increasingly liberty-loathing, entitlement-oriented, special-interest pandering politicians are simply serving to support and encourage the slackers, while our uninformed, apathetic electorate is serving as the catalyst that consistently enables our suicidal march to oblivion.

Thanks so much for your excellent, insightful contribution here. Hearing about that industrious ten-year-old made my day!

~ joanie
Allegiance and Duty Betrayed

[Caipirabob]

My thoughts could be summarized as "Teach your children about the American Revolution and train them for the next one."

[dirtbiker]

Your best bet is to do the exact opposite ow what the liberal social engineers recommend.

That is EXACTLY what I did raising my 2 MEN.

I have joked with both stating their mother and I followed the advice of experts, read the books, listened to the lectures, took the classes, etc., and they STILL turned out OK in spite of us.... :-)

(BTW, the "experts" I followed were my own parents....)

[valkyrieanne]

There is no pre-school program in existence that is more nurturing or mentally/emotionally inspiring for a four-year-old than a mother who provides one-on-one example and instruction.

That's true. We had fun when our kids were little, in that a group of like-minded moms got together and decided to do a kind of "preschool at home." We'd meet once or twice a week, have a little activity for the kids, juice and cookies, free play out in the back yard or basement when it was cold. Most of the moms had babies too as well as toddlers, so it was fun to take care of the babies, chat, and let the toddlers play.

Of course that requires a mom at home, which seems to be a vanishing species these days.

[downwithsocialism]

This may be the best thing you have written Joanie, more brilliant than anything you’ll read in the mainstream media.

[joanie-f]

Thanks for the very kind words, Brad, even though the latter part of your compliment is a dubious distinction, at best. :)