Posted on 03/11/2008 5:30:41 PM PDT by Cecily
Dr. Laura Schlessinger has never been one to shrink from controversy, and she leaped headlong into one on Monday when she said that if a husband cheats, his wife may share some of the blame.
“When the wife does not focus in on the needs and the feelings, sexually, personally, to make him feel like a man, to make him feel like a success, to make him feel like her hero, he’s very susceptible to the charm of some other woman making him feel what he needs,” the popular psychologist and radio personality said.
More commonly known as just “Dr. Laura,” Schlessinger made the remarks while participating in one of several panel discussions on TODAY dealing with the breaking news that New York Gov. Eliot Spitzer had been connected to a high-priced prostitution ring.
(Excerpt) Read more at msnbc.msn.com ...
They may be cheating pigs, but you don't know if they were "loving and faithful wives", especially the loving part.
My ex was not a loving wife. She was a good mother, but unaffectionate and sexually unavailable; and I never cheated on her. There is no excuse for sex outside of marriage.
Game.....set....match!
I'm sure you've noticed the men don't do housework once they're married articles. I'm sure you've also noticed that THERE ARE NEVER women don't give sex once they're married articles.
Funny how that works.
I blame Eve
RTFA!!!!!
Schlessinger later emphasized that she was not excusing Spitzer’s behavior. Nor, she said, was she saying that his wife, Silda Spitzer, was in some way to blame for his indiscretion.
“I do not know anything about their personal lives,” she said.
But, she persisted, frequently when there is infidelity in marriage, both spouses share the blame.
You’re a good man.
Your ex is a moron. :)
LOL... I must not know the same women you do! :) In fact, I used the plunger yesterday. Mouse traps on the other hand, well you’ve got a point there. I used to have pet mice, and I just can’t stand to be the one to put them out of their misery... My husband gets that job. LOL
As for shoveling and mowing the lawn — those are actually the type of work that I love to do! LOL The type of work that stays done for a while after you’re finished and it looks so nice (vacuuming too most times), versus say dish washing or laundry, which need to be done several times a day, and you never get the satisfaction of it being “done” because an hour later - there you are again!
I think she wants women to accept that men are different.
“I guess abused women should just stop pissing off their husbands. Who knew that the solutions to life’s complicated problems could be so easy?!”
That’s a very poor analogy. There are very few activities that will lead men to generally abuse a woman who they married. Witholding sex for months on end, however, I’d bet leads to a statically verifiable correlation with cheating.
That’s a great book!
Was your husband home at the time?
I would just add, "If anything." One has to be willing to ask the question. Sometimes the answer is, "nothing." You're married to an @sshole.
Of course, this applies to both women and men.
Quite right Doc Laura.
Unless a man is spanking his lesser but equal simian or “quore”, then there’s a woman in there cheating too....or adultering (sic)
what makes you think they do housework BEFORE they married?
(girlfriends, maids, or just not doing it)
A strong woman needs a strong man to submit to.
damn this is fun....
From the article:
Schlessinger later emphasized that she was not excusing Spitzer’s behavior. Nor, she said, was she saying that his wife, Silda Spitzer, was in some way to blame for his indiscretion.
“I do not know anything about their personal lives,” she said.
But, she persisted, frequently when there is infidelity in marriage, both spouses share the blame.
RTFA!!!!!
In many cases what you did was picked your mate poorly, overlooking warning signs while courting.
This woman took this step after reading The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands.
She also realized that starting the day off with an orgasm wasn't all that bad.
When a baisically good man knows his sexual needs are going to be metm he is happier, works harder, listens more, etc; and he has a happier wife. It's good advice.
Imagine finding you here! LOL!
Men don’t just want sex...they NEED sex! Just like their female partners. As humans, we are programmed to breed like mice.
Here’s the problem...Men who are denied quality sex,WILL go in search of it!
Society says that’s not allowed so then he tries to curb those extremely strong urges!
SO CALLED respectable men have found a way to curb those urges, but the urges still remain. If not taken care of often, those urges become more important than honor, pride, respect, dignity, self! HE WILL try to satisfy those urges, somehow!
The wealthy,famous,popular...find out that they can buck societies rules and get away with it for awhile, then BAM!
Urges are urges! They must be taken care of eventually or disaster WILL strike down the road!
It works both ways...one gender is not more important than the other! We both have urges that MUST be dealt with, not ignored.
No-one is saying that there aren’t reasons for why spouses choose to cheat... Just that blaming the actual decision to cheat vs. working on the problems of a marriage no matter whose “fault” they are, on the non-cheating spouse is ridiculous.
And, I personally think it’s a very fair analogy. In abusive relationships the abuser uses the self-doubt, and self-blame of the abused to further control them. It’s outright manipulation.
That is the type of thinking that we should be wary of promoting, and that is why, according to this article at least, Dr. Laura is getting hit so hard over what she said. In the way it’s presented here it’s a very dangerous way of thinking and one I wouldn’t want my own daughters to engage in when they are married some day (not that I won’t teach them that a strong marriage takes the work of BOTH partners to be lasting and good).
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