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Party Girl: Chelsea Clinton Cuts Loose With 2,000 Gay Men in Red Dresses
Willamette Week Newspaper & WWEEK.COM ^ | 4-13-08

Posted on 04/14/2008 5:29:52 PM PDT by kingattax

I was supposed to ask her questions like "where are you most likely to disagree with your mom or your dad?" or "did you ever call your mom at 3 am and how did she react?"

But all I could think of was that: "I am...standing in front of Hill and Bill's kid...in a red Mary Kay Cosmetics Collection dress...I'd just bought that day at the Goodwill...how weird is that?"

Yes, Chelsea Clinton made it to the infamous "Red Dress" Party.

Not to be confused with that other annual "Red Dress" fundraiser, this is the "Red Dress Party," a mondo-alcohol-fueled dance party where nearly 2,000 gay men in various states of red dress undress (and several nearly naked straight men as well as one very colorfully decorated naked woman) invade a warehouse in Northeast Portland and dance their collective asses off to pounding disco music and the incredible Storm Large and her Balls (they were beyond fabulous). Large, a bigtime Obama supporter even dedicated one of her more infamous songs, Ladylike, to Chelsea's mama.

According to my sources Ms. Clinton moved heaven and earth (well, she just trimmed some of her other meetings in Oregon Saturday that included stops in Eugene and Portland State University) so that she could make the par-ty.

At 9:30 pm, just as we were walking in, I noticed one of the Governor's more attractive staffers (Hans Bernard) heading toward the door with a very attractive blonde.

"Oh my god, it's Chelsea," I screamed.

Before I knew it Hans had my partner, Juan Martinez, and me next to her for a quick photo.

And then we had a conversation. It was quick. I don't recall much of it. And I hadn't even had a drink yet.

Suffice to say I think I said something about how much crap I've received for writing something about how her mom should be the next President.

She was very sweet and talked about how much she liked Oregon and how it had been a really long day.

After pleasantries I suggested that we join her at whatever her next party was.

She said, "oh, I'm sorry, I have to run. I'm on a red-eye to Philadelphia."

And then, poof, like Cinderella she was gone.

I heard one of the reasons she left early was she really wanted to ride the MAX train. She had heard so much about our mass transit system and she wanted to check it out for herself. I can't imagine that is what the way she got back to the airport for her flight out of town, but that's what my sources say.

Oh, that Chelsea.

Byron Beck, Chelsea Clinton and Juan Martinez at Red Dress Party, Portland Oregon.


TOPICS: News/Current Events; Politics/Elections; US: Oregon
KEYWORDS: chelsea; democratculture; hillary; homosexual; homosexualagenda; mentalillness; or2008; perverts; reddress
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looks like chelsea is hillary's ambassador to the homosexuals.
1 posted on 04/14/2008 5:29:53 PM PDT by kingattax
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To: kingattax
You go girl!

Just ... go.

2 posted on 04/14/2008 5:32:06 PM PDT by ClearCase_guy
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To: kingattax

Are these the super gay delegates I keep hearing so much about?


3 posted on 04/14/2008 5:32:42 PM PDT by TheWasteLand
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Comment #4 Removed by Moderator

To: kingattax
At 9:30 pm, just as we were walking in, I noticed one of the Governor's more attractive staffers (Hans Bernard) heading toward the door with a very attractive blonde.
"Oh my god, it's Chelsea," I screamed.

Sounds like Byron needs glasses. Is there a charity I can donate to that gives remedial optics to homos? "Glasses for Users of *sses" perhaps?

5 posted on 04/14/2008 5:37:39 PM PDT by ikka
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To: kingattax

You forgot the b-a-a-a-a-AARRRRRRFFF! warning.


6 posted on 04/14/2008 5:38:31 PM PDT by SandRat (Duty, Honor, Country. What else needs to be said?)
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To: kingattax

Good Lord, is this country ever grateful for the Clintons?


7 posted on 04/14/2008 5:39:17 PM PDT by billhilly (I was republican when republican wasn't cool. (With an apology to Barbara Mandrell.))
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To: kingattax

She is still a spit-n image of Web Hubbell.


8 posted on 04/14/2008 5:39:24 PM PDT by chainsaw ( No black racist Muslims in the WH.)
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To: kingattax

Byron and Juan make a Chelsea Sandwich.


9 posted on 04/14/2008 5:39:52 PM PDT by windsorknot
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To: kingattax
poor thing looks more like Web everday  
10 posted on 04/14/2008 5:40:03 PM PDT by tomkat (we're hosed)
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To: chainsaw

11 posted on 04/14/2008 5:40:53 PM PDT by kingattax (99 % of liberals give the rest a bad name)
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To: kingattax
Photobucket Photobucket
12 posted on 04/14/2008 5:41:31 PM PDT by sionnsar (trad-anglican.faithweb.com |Iran Azadi| 5yst3m 0wn3d - it's N0t Y0ur5 (SONY) | UN: Useless Nations)
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To: kingattax
Portland is the PITS. Gay, Lesbian, whatever your perversion, is OK there. My impression is that the population is made up of hippies that grew old but never grew up. Tie-dyed t-shirts, scruffy dress, beards and tatoos, wardrobe by “Columbia”, and a liberal mindset that makes one want to vomit. The “Rose City” has a fragrance more like body odor than a rose!
13 posted on 04/14/2008 5:43:04 PM PDT by BatGuano
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To: kingattax

Chelsea just having a gay ole time.


14 posted on 04/14/2008 5:43:54 PM PDT by taxesareforever (Never forget Matt Maupin)
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To: kingattax
Blue suede dresses would be more appropriate...
15 posted on 04/14/2008 5:46:19 PM PDT by Grizzled Bear ("Does not play well with others.")
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To: taxesareforever

Post of the Day Award!!


16 posted on 04/14/2008 5:46:21 PM PDT by TaMoDee
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To: chainsaw
Odds are she wasn’t the prettiest girl there.
17 posted on 04/14/2008 5:46:31 PM PDT by CaptainK (...please make it stop. Shake a can of pennies at it.)
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To: kingattax
At least they had the decency to not invite her to "Blue Dress Day."

That would have been a sticky situation.

18 posted on 04/14/2008 5:46:36 PM PDT by dead (I've got my eye out for Mullah Omar.)
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To: taxesareforever
Campaign whore award of the new millenium.

Sorry Mr.& Mrs Clinton........Gotta call em as I see's em.

Just two pimps getting their daughter to do the spade work.

19 posted on 04/14/2008 5:46:48 PM PDT by blackdog
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To: windsorknot
I say “the perverted prevaricator's daughter between two butt pirates”
20 posted on 04/14/2008 5:47:13 PM PDT by BatGuano
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