What if no one were fat?

Money Central ^ | April 23, 2008 | Shirley Skeel

[14erClimb]

Editor's note: This is part of an occasional series on financial what-ifs.

In the United States today, 66% of adults are overweight. Almost 33% of adults are obese, and 4.7% are morbidly obese, or more than 100 pounds overweight. But . . .

What if nobody in America were fat?

We'd save billions of dollars in gas. Airlines would double their profits. A dearth of diabetes and other diseases would save billions of dollars more -- and put thousands of doctors on the street. McDonald's would sell not Big Macs but little steamed chicken snacks -- or watch its profits melt away. Productivity would rise, potentially creating tens of thousands more jobs or higher wages all around.

Add up the savings up on health, food, clothing and efficiencies, and you could buy a professional home gym for every U.S. household -- or hand each $4,270 in cash.

[14erClimb]

Better lose some weight for the greater good, comrades.

[ClearCase_guy]

The government wants its pound of flesh. Or thirty pounds, as the case may be.

[A Balrog of Morgoth]

Yup, this is nothing more than justification for more nanny state intrusion.

[sarasota]

Processed food companies would be out of business—especially the “diet” soda folks.

[B-Chan]

What if no one were black?

Either way — it’s a stupid question.

[14erClimb]

This, sadly, would not exist:

[sarasota]

I felt my ateries closing at the sight of that burger!

[bronxboy]

I have a better question, What if no one was gay? or a junkie? Think of all the money we would save from not having people with AIDS. Also, make it mandatory to be monogamous. We could play this game forever. Old people, preemies, etc.

[jrestrepo]

Drop the bacon and it’s mine!

[14erClimb]

Intrusion? Don't they just want to help you?

/sarc

[Minn]

McDonald's would sell not Big Macs but little steamed chicken snacks -- or watch its profits melt away

BS. Lot's of thin people eat junk food. Some eat a lot of it.

[pillut48]

Then by all means, DEATH to fat people everywhere since they are the ultimate cause of all evil, like overpriced airline tickets!!!!

/sarc

Only problem is, who gets to determine what ‘fat’ is? I’ve heard that one of the best ways is the BMI index, but then again, it would declare Arnold Schwarzenegger as ‘fat’!!!

What, oh, what is the world to do?!? [holds hand to forehead and has the vapors]

[Hemingway's Ghost]

If nobody in America were fat, we wouldn't have funny comedians like John Belushi, John Candy, or Chris Farley. Hey--wait a minute.

Okay, we still have Artie Lange.

[Coldwater Creek]

Have you noticed how thin those polygamy women are? No fast food available.

[L98Fiero]

“BS. Lot’s of thin people eat junk food. Some eat a lot of it.”

Amen. 6’1” here and 165 lbs. Do not get between me and my Wendy’s Baconator.

I’m still waiting to be educated on how the most common of common food items become poisionous people-inflators when they enter a McDonalds.

[Cicero]

What if no one were fat? What if no one smoked? What if . . . .

Well, stupid (I mean Shirley Skeel by that, not 14erClimb), then they’d all die of something else. They’d all probably spend a couple of extra years in the nursing home, or make more visits to the hospital, and it would cost even more!

Be grateful that people are killing themselves off early and saving the social security and medicare systems badly needed funds.

[L98Fiero]

“Have you noticed how thin those polygamy women are? No fast food available.”

LOL. More like constant horizontal exercise.

[Lazamataz]

What if there was no pollution? No death? No darkness? No mosquitos? No deep wells? No tornadoes? No gay people? No crime? No unhappiness? No spoiled tomatoes? No molds and mildews? No sharks? No Fonzi jumping sharks? No gravity? No space aliens capturing me for yet another anal probe?

[Nat Turner]

What if no one voted for DEMONCRAPS????

[devane617]

Great observation....It had not occurred to me, but now that you point it out it is obvious. I took a look at old family pictures the other day and everyone looks like that are starving to death. Well, we know they were not. Also, I enjoy watching the classic sports channel. Pre 1980 games...The players all look starved according to today’s players. Fast-food may be the culprit.

[Varda]

Actually all that’s wrong with that burger is the bread. Take that away and it’s health food.

[Centurion2000]

The war on tobacco continues .... now the war on fat people starts.

[Coldwater Creek]

IMHO, it’s working moms. I kn
ow that some have no choice, but many do, and choose to not be a homemaker.

[Morgana]

McDonalds and Wendys would go out of business!!!!

[spotbust1]

This won't help you lose weight, but it will help with the vapors ;-)

[Old North State]

These static analyses are always wrong anyway. We wouldn't ‘save’ billions on gas, people would just drive more and make other changes etc. It reminds me of the ‘what if nobody smoked’ argument, sure less lung cancer, but the increased costs in aged care ans SS would more than offset any savings.

[Morgana]

OH HELL NO! THIS IS A REAL BURGER!!!!! THE MONSTER THICKBURGER FROM HARDEES!!!!!

[pillut48]

Not at my house. My DH is from India, and the spicier the food, the better for him!! Have you ever smelled Indian ‘pickle’?!

Just don’t light any matches around here, okay? ;-)

[Allegra]

That Steakhouse thing Burger King is advertising looks awfully good. ;-)

I'm sure the government would love to outlaw stuff like that.

[latina4dubya]

McDonalds and Wendys would go out of business!!!!

not so... not everyone who eats junk food is overweight or fat...

[Soliton]

Farming and hospitality economic sectors would collapse. There would then be food shortages and people would starve because they had no fat reserves. I for one will NEVER let this atrocity happen. Today is 30 cent wing day at Wiggy’s here in Pittsburgh. I will do my share to help save the world.

[Morgana]

THANKS A LOT.....NOW I AM HUNGRY FOR THE THICKBURGER!!!

[MEGoody]

We’d save a ton of money just not giving anyone health care. Or, we could regulate everything they do in life, from who they have sex with (and how often) to what type of bed they sleep in. That would save a lot of money too.

[MEGoody]

If nobody in America were fat, we wouldn't have funny comedians like John Belushi, John Candy, or Chris Farley. Hey--wait a minute.

Just want to clarify - John Belushi died of a drug overdose. Had nothing to do with his weight.

[-YYZ-]

“Processed food companies would be out of business—especially the “diet” soda folks.”

Actually, diet sodas are part of the reason I’m not fat - if I consumed the amount of regular, sugared soda that I do diet sodas, the huge amount of sugar would surely put the pounds on me. Sure, an even healthier choice would be drink other things, like water, unsweetened tea and coffee, and so on, but diet sodas do have their place.

[sarasota]

The government would be asking for a consumer revolt on a massive scale if they tried!

[Morgana]

“not so... not everyone who eats junk food is overweight or fat...”

Yea, I know....I was making a funny! I hate McDonalds! Only my Dog likes McDonalds hamburgers!

[SoDak]

That’s a beautiful thing.

[metmom]

I have a better question, What if no one was gay? or a junkie? Think of all the money we would save from not having people with AIDS. Also, make it mandatory to be monogamous. We could play this game forever. Old people, preemies, etc.

Exactly.

[HungarianGypsy]

It must be nice to have a perfect body.

[Gorzaloon]

Then by all means, DEATH to fat people everywhere since they are the ultimate cause of all evil, like overpriced airline tickets!!!!

WHAT? You mean all the smokers have been sent to the reducation camps already??

[Lazamataz]

Have you ever smelled Indian ‘pickle’?!

No. SAYYYYyyyyy, yer not gay, are you?

[sarasota]

My concern is fake sugar, especially aspartame. May help with weight control (though some say not), but could lead to disease down the line. Cancer comes to mind. Just relating some of the “facts” I’ve read about over the years. The endgame: to each his/her own.

[metmom]

Lot's of thin people eat junk food. Some eat a lot of it.

Ain't that the truth. I've been astounded at what some thinnies can eat.

I used to be able to do that; anything I wanted, as much as I wanted. Now I eat less than I did then and better to boot, and fight to keep from gaining weight.

[MrB]

The left DOES want to regulate everything about your life (with one exception). And they WILL use the universal healthcare system as the hammer to do so, just like they are using the environment as the hammer to control people’s energy usage.

My Second Undeniable Truth about “Liberalism” is that

despite the misnomer of “liberal”, the left seeks to control every aspect of people’s lives, except for those that involve uninhibited consequence-free sexual behavior choices. For those aspects, the First Undeniable Truth applies.

My First Undeniable Truth about “Liberalism” is that

“liberalism” in a nutshell is using force to make the innocent and those that make good decisions pay for the consequences of those that make bad decisions.

[Morgana]

"COME ON BOYS....WERE OFF TO MCDONALDS......A DOUBLE CHEESEBURGER WITH NO ONIONS FOR EVERYONE!!!!"

[Dr.Zoidberg]

“What if no one were fat?”

Well first off, smug, self righteous, ass*oles like the author would have to find something else to harp on to give him a feeling of superiority.

Second, well, hmmm... Nope, I guess that's the only thing.

[uptoolate]

In protest, I’m gonna go from 60 pounds overweight to 80 pounds.

[sarasota]

Add to that the increase in girth in Europe since the fast food invasion.

[Dr.Zoidberg]

...to give him a...

Him, her, an ass*ole is an ass*ole.