Posted on 06/02/2008 1:55:29 PM PDT by Titus Quinctius Cincinnatus
Yeah. I was definitely a nerd, and socially inept, but, I didn't have to worry about being physically bothered. 6'0, 180 going into 9th grade.
The author's about right on some of that. I was never popular because I didn't care about the stuff they did. Clothes? Something to keep me warm and not naked. Cars? Something to get me from here to there. I'm not sure we ever really lived in the same world, me and the 'popular' crowd. I still don't. I work in IT, where I'm allowed to be me, and not some corporate idea of how you're supposed to act.
Small derail here, but, is it only me that thinks that the primary rule to work in sales is 'Lie as much as the market will bear'? I couldn't look in the mirror in the morning if I made my money that way. However, the most successful salespeople I know were the 'popular' people in high school. Coincidence?
One would think that rural schools would be better, but our rural school with only a hundred kids per grade is nearly what he describes. The big city schools are, apparently, worse -- what he describes may be an understatement when applied to such metro schools.
Actually, the smaller schools can be in some ways worse. At least in the big schools, there's a small band of nerds to join with. In a small school (33 in grad class) I had one or two like me. I didn't really meet what I would call 'peers' till I was 15. Talk about confused...
That fits. I'm an 'aspie' myself. I work 6 PM-4:30 AM 4 nights a week, for a decent salary and good benefits. I don't have to deal with the 9 to 5 people, nor they with me. I perform a valuable service for my boss who has to cover things 24/7/365, and she rewards me for it. Social standing? Pfft. I have my wife, my 4 wonderful children, and my family as my social life, pretty much. I do have one treasured female friend from here at work who is probably as 'aspie' as I am. The rest of my social life is online, really, with people a lot like me. I know that to some of you that sounds like an empty life, but, keep in mind that how I see a lot of people live looks pretty empty to me. If I'm happy with it, as is my family, what does it matter?
Also, I've done what I can for my kids in school. I make sure my oldest girl (she's 14) understands how it really works, and why some of the kids treat her how they do, and that the only way to deal with it is to remember that she is worth every bit as much as they are, and to do it her way, not just follow them for some ephemeral 'popularity'. She does pretty well.
The star football player and most popular boy at our school did end up working for one of the biggest nerds in school. I have noticed those at the so-called A table at my high school almost to a man/woman have ended up losers in life. I think a lot of it has to do with everyone in their life giving them the star treatment and then they can’t handle the real world where they are a little fish in a big pond after high school.
I tried to tell this to my daughters when they were in high school, and feeling resentful- they did not believe me but are now old enough that it is starting to prove true. Some of the A bunch have parents with a business or real money so it takes longer to see their issues, but they do show up sooner or later in most cases.
I think you are describing the B table students- who are usually very successful at life. You are right- social skills are important.
My CPU has been pinned at 100% for the last 5 hours. NuMega BoundsChecker is chewing on a C++ program. It's a frustrating wait to finish.
I think there is a whole lot to what you posted. I excelled at school in the lower grades but I went to a school where they were trying the “track” system for subjects. My parents moved and I ended up in a really lousy jr. high followed by a worse high school.
I hated school by the time I was in high school and was failing nearly every subject when I quit after my Sophmore year- I felt like it was a prison. After I quit school my mother homeschooled me so I could pass the GED; this was in the early 70s before the Homeschool popularity. Mother was on her own in uncharted water because I was the baby of a big family and all my siblings did well in school and finished.
I have to give mom a lot of credit because I excelled academically in college. It was really amusing too, because I went to college when I would have if I had stayed in high school. My peers could not figure out how the class dummy/dropout from high school was setting the curve in college classes.LOL
My youngest daughter followed in my footsteps after her older sisters were the nerds in high school. She is now at the top of her class in a medical tech. program; she is loving school again.
What passes for "social" interaction is often banal, boring and irrelevant. The 3,000 mile gap between my house and the office where my co-workers ply their trade is a convenient means of avoiding office parties. I have a good excuse for not attending. When it's not avoidable, I can play the game. I never watch TV, so the yammering about TV shows and sporting events never strikes a chord with me. Unfortunately, that is exactly how many other people spend their time.
Quite a few teachers act like the students and fall right in favoring the popular students and allowing or even joining the “picking on the nerd” games. At least it was that way when I went to school; and my daughters complained about the same thing so I think it is still happening. In spite of all the diversity training.
My oldest daughter was an excellent speller; her 2nd grade teacher actually resented it. She never missed a spelling word, even the bonus words. He became more and more annoyed with her for her spelling skills as the year progressed for some bizarre reason. I walked into his class early one day to pick her up and he was literally yelling at her that if she was so smart she should spell Supercalifragilisticexpealidocious(sp) she was very upset, near tears and he was ragging on her for doing well. Needless to say I forced the school to switch classes for her, and would have had that man fired if we hadn’t moved shortly after.
...but it was not a sport anyone imagined doing in high school. An activity wasn't a sport unless it involved teams. And it it wasn't played with a spheroid, it was, well, kind of gay.
J.R. Simplot is one of those exceptions. I had never heard of him until he died.
You thought track and field kind of gay?
Congratulations to you and your daughter.
I usually know if I have hit upon a powerful truth that will gain traction in the general press. How do I know it?
Answer: The government school defender go NUTZ in response to my posts.
Good observations. My kids have never set foot in a government education facility, and they won't either, unless we hear specifically from God that they need to invade one.
Good for you! Lucky for your children.
It's a great option for those that want to be done NOW and get on with life.
Nope. Physician.
We are a nest of paper-shufflers over here, and you can shuffle paper pretty much anywhere.
Sounds like they are taxing you pretty much to the limit. I thought City of Atlanta was bad, but clearly they are amateurs in this area! (You have a COUNTY income tax??!!?)
“Yeah, if you have a lot of contact with the public, telecommuting on a regular basis is pretty much a no-go.”
Actually, I've mandated that folks work to set up clients so that we can do as much remote work as possible. But large amounts of our work require physical interaction.
“Sounds like they are taxing you pretty much to the limit. I thought City of Atlanta was bad, but clearly they are amateurs in this area! (You have a COUNTY income tax??!!?)”
There are folks more heavily taxed. My understanding is that New York City and some of the surrounding suburbs have it worse. But Maryland's pretty good at taxing folks, too. For folks with public water, of course, there are taxes built in. But a few years ago, they came after us folks with septic tanks, charging us an additional $30 per year for the privilege of having a well. LOL.
Of course, we have a variety of state lottery games, and we have horse racing, where a significant percentage of the handle is skimmed off the top and sent directly to Annapolis. They want to save the horse racing industry by putting slot machines in at the tracks (because the tracks in nearby Delaware, West Virginia, and now Pennsylvania are doing similarly), and of course, the largest percentage, after pay-outs, of the handle will go to the state. Estimated state revenues: starting at $800M annually.
As for county income tax, it's called a “piggyback tax.” The state's tax is up to 6+% (although, in all fairness, the rate is something like 5.5% for the first million dollars annually of taxable income), and then each county sets its own “piggyback tax” which is collected by the state through the state income tax system and then sent back to the individual taxpayer's county of residence. I think that the highest permitted piggyback tax is something in the range of about 3%? My county is a little less than 2.5%.
In some counties, there is a park and planning tax that is roughly equal to the property tax, and comes as part of your property tax bill. That's why the property tax bills in the neighboring county are double what they are in my county.
If you own waterfront, there are special taxes for that, depending on your frontage.
Local municipalities, of course, have their own taxes. But so do unincorporated "taxing districts." What's nasty about these is that the folks who informally get to decide the taxes aren't elected in government-sponsored elections, and because they aren't elected government officials, aren't subject to the same restraints as are government officials.
Then, for some years, there have been “fees” imposed by the public water authorities and the local counties for “impact” of development. These are amortized and added to your water or tax bills, and can add a couple of thousand bucks a year over the course of some years for new construction.
The state also charges a property tax, which is added on to the county property tax bill.
When you buy/sell a house, there is a recordation fee (I think that's $500), and then there is a transfer tax, which, again, varies from county to county. I think that the state portion is something over 1%, and counties vary from 1% up. Meaning that the state and local fees and taxes on a typical $500,000 home will easily top $12,000 or more.
This was very cool for the state and counties during the real estate boom. It was better than having your own printing press. Yet, we were always in danger of running a state budget deficit. LOL. So, when the real estate market went south, our new governor upped the sales tax, the income tax, and any other taxes he could find lying around that hadn't been raised in recent years.
Oh, and the tax on cigarettes. I think it's like a buck higher per pack than in Virginia.
And of course, we have high taxes on alcohol, and a protected alcohol distribution industry. It's illegal to buy alcohol over state lines, including over the Internet. Because Maryland isn't getting its “fair share” of the cut.
All that aside, I live in the Annapolis area, and it is a beautiful place to live.
sitetest
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.