Swedish town 'full of sex-mad lesbians' lures male tourists-(single Chinese)

news ^ | 10/8/09 | By staff writers

[Flavius]

SWEDISH tourism bodies have been swamped with inquiries from millions of men captivated by a mythical town rumoured to be home to 25,000 sex-mad lesbians.

The town of "Chako Paul City" is said to have been founded in 1820 in the northern Swedish woods by a wealthy man-hating widow.

Two blonde women are rumoured to stand guard at the town, which also features a medieval castle.

[Flavius]

30 million lonely men by 2020

A Xinhua report dated Jan 11 tells us of a problem we all knew was bound to happen — that there will be MANY lonely Chinese men in the years to come.

The report issued by the State Population and Family Planning Commission had some startling numbers to divulge:

* There will be 30 million more males of marriageable age in China than females by the year 2020

http://shanghaiist.com/2007/01/22/30_million_lone.php

[Parley Baer]

A post such as this needs pictures to cap it off.

[grey_whiskers]

Cheers!

[Incorrigible]

You holding out on us here WesternCulture? Is this how you treat your FRiends?

[screaminsunshine]

They guard the Jewels of Opar.

[political1]

I understand they are applying for the first expansion team in the WNBA.

[cardinal4]

We knew that would happen in China. You know some West African frogs have been known to change sex to reproduce...I’m just sayin’..

[pissant]

[NaughtiusMaximus]

I’m trying to think of an appropriate Ole and Liza joke but I’m not hitting.

“She’s so drunk she thinks she’s me.”??? Nah.

[dead]

They need to make Linda Blair young again. This is her kind of movie.

[snarks_when_bored]

Swedish town 'full of sex-mad lesbians' lures male tourists-(single Chinese)

Uh, they're LESBIANS, Chinese guys. Do you think you're going to convert 'em?

[RoadKingSE]

A post such as this needs pictures to cap it off.

You're damn Skippy Baer. Here's Sonny Bono's "daughter" just for you. That looks like a GMT-Master Swiss Chronometer on her dainty right arm.

[Sender]

That’s a cheap quartz watch in a big blingy case. Not sure what the tats and the Rohrshach t-shirt mean...maybe “don’t F with me”, literally.

[Minutemen]

Just a little side note:

"Chastity Bono Undergoing Sex Change"

[kaehurowing]

NARRATOR: The Tale of Sir Galahad

[boom crash]
[angels singing]

[pound pound pound]

GALAHAD: Open the door!
Open the door!
[pound pound pound]
In the name of King Arthur, open the door!
[squeak thump]
[squeak boom]

ALL: Hello!

ZOOT: Welcome gentle Sir knight, welcome to the Castle Anthrax.

GALAHAD: The Castle Anthrax?

ZOOT: Yes... oh, it’s not a very good name? Oh! but we are nice and we shall attend to your every, every need!

GALAHAD: You are the keepers of the Holy Grail?

ZOOT: The what?

GALAHAD: The Grail — it is here?

ZOOT: Oh, but you are tired, and you must rest awhile.

Midget!
Crepper!

MIDGET and CREPPER: Yes, oh Zoot!

ZOOT: Prepare a bed for our guest.

MIDGET and CREPPER: Oh thank you thank you thank you—

ZOOT: Away away vile temptress! The beds here are warm and soft — and very, very big.

GALAHAD: Well, look, I-I-uh—

ZOOT: What is your name, handsome knight?

GALAHAD: Sir Galahad... the Chaste.

ZOOT: Mine is Zoot... just Zoot. Oh, but come!

GALAHAD: Look, please! In God’s name, show me the Grail!

ZOOT: Oh, you have suffered much! You are delirious!

GALAHAD: L-look, I have seen it! It is here, in the—

ZOOT: Sir Galahad! You would not be so ungallant as to refuse our hospitality.

GALAHAD: Well, I-I-uh—

ZOOT: Oh, I am afraid our life must seem very dull and quiet compared to yours. We are but eight score young blondes and brunettes, all between sixteen and nineteen and a half, cut off in this castle with no one to protect us! Oh, it is a lonely life — bathing, dressing, undressing, making exciting underwear.... We are just not used to handsome knights.

Nay, nay, come, come, you may lie here. Oh, but you are wounded!

GALAHAD: No, no — i-it’s nothing!

ZOOT: Oh, but you must see the doctors immediately! No, no, please, lie down.

[clap clap]

PIGLET: Ah. What seems to be the trouble?

GALAHAD: They’re doctors?!

ZOOT: Uh, they’ve had a basic medical training, yes.

GALAHAD: B-but—

ZOOT: Oh, come come, you must try to rest! Doctor Piglet, Doctor Winston, practice your art.

PIGLET: Try to relax.

GALAHAD: Are you sure that’s necessary?

PIGLET: We must examine you.

GALAHAD: There’s nothing wrong with that!

PIGLET: Please — we are doctors.

GALAHAD: Get off the bed! I am sworn to chastity!

PIGLET: Back to your bed!

GALAHAD: Torment me no longer! I have seen the Grail!

PIGLET: There’s no grail here.

GALAHAD: I have seen it, I have seen it. I have seen—

GIRLS: Hello.

GALAHAD: Oh—

VARIOUS GIRLS: Hello.

Hello.
Hello.
Hello.
Hello.
Hello.
Hello.
Hello.
Hello.
Hello.
Hello.
Hello.

GALAHAD: Zoot!

DINGO: No, I am Zoot’s identical twin sister, Dingo.

GALAHAD: Oh, well, excuse me, I—

DINGO: Where are you going?

GALAHAD: I seek the Grail! I have seen it, here in this castle!

DINGO: No! Oh, no! Bad, bad Zoot!

GALAHAD: What is it?

DINGO: Oh, wicked, bad, naughty Zoot! She has been setting alight to our beacon, which, I just remembered, is grail-shaped. It’s not the first time we’ve had this problem.

GALAHAD: It’s not the real Grail?

DINGO: Oh, wicked, bad, naughty, evil Zoot! Oh, she is a naughty person, and she must pay the penalty — and here in Castle Anthrax, we have but one punishment for setting alight the grail-shaped beacon. You must tie her down on a bed and spank her!

GIRLS: A spanking! A spanking!

DINGO: You must spank her well. And after you have spanked her, you may deal with her as you like. And then, spank me.

VARIOUS GIRLS: And spank me.

And me.
And me.

DINGO: Yes, yes, you must give us all a good spanking!

GIRLS: A spanking! A spanking

[Slings and Arrows]

"I so ronery."

---

[Boiler Plate]

"Chastity Bono Undergoing Sex Change"

Are they going to turn her into a girl?

[rmlew]

I see a lot of internet porn, probably 3d by then.

[MediaMole]

There is a far older solution to male-female imbalance — War.

It kills off a portion of the extra men and the survivors get all the women they want from the defeated enemy. Not a good thought when you realize who China may fight in the next 50 years.