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Fear the blobfish
Chicago Tribune ^ | 02-17-10 | John Kass

Posted on 02/17/2010 7:06:54 AM PST by mlizzy

Federal fish fighters this week are preparing further assaults on the feared Asian carp, with nets, electrified fences, poison — whatever they can do to stop the terrifying beast from entering the Great Lakes.

Yet as scary as the jumping Asian carp may be, there's something even scarier.

The blobfish.

As you can see from the accompanying photograph, the cunning blobfish (Psychrolutes marcidus) is the most terrifying fish in the world.

And if you're not afraid of it yet, you should be, because there's always something lurking out there that can get you.

Its hideously deformed body is quite boneless, a gelatinous orb hovering in the deep, covered in slime and mucus. But there's something even worse.

Its face.

Most fish don't really have faces. You've heard people refer to "fish eyes" or "fish lips," or they say, "Oh, shut up, you old fish face."

But the blobfish actually has a face. Not a fish face, but a human face, complete with lips and a big, bulbous nose.

A blobfish looks like some fat, drunken judge and may be highly intelligent. And therefore quite dangerous.

It frowns. It leers. Sometimes, it even drools.

"That's gross!" said an editor around here who didn't believe me. But once she saw the photos, she began gnawing the knuckles on her right hand in sheer, abject terror.

(Excerpt) Read more at chicagotribune.com ...


TOPICS: Culture/Society
KEYWORDS: blobfish; johnkass
And to think
I used to have
nightmares about
the lion fish.
1 posted on 02/17/2010 7:06:55 AM PST by mlizzy
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To: mlizzy

“Ph’nglui mglw’nafh Cthulhu R’lyeh wgah’nagl fhtagn”


2 posted on 02/17/2010 7:10:04 AM PST by ClearCase_guy (I was born in America, but now I live in Declinistan.)
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To: mlizzy

"Haa cha cha cha !"

3 posted on 02/17/2010 7:12:05 AM PST by OB1kNOb (Help support a sustainable America for tomorrow. Go green by recycling Congress.)
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To: mlizzy

Helen, is that you?


4 posted on 02/17/2010 7:12:20 AM PST by bgill (The framers of the US Constitution established an entire federal government in 18 pages.)
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To: ClearCase_guy
“Ph’nglui mglw’nafh Cthulhu R’lyeh wgah’nagl fhtagn”

Okay, I give up; can you translate, or will it get your comment pulled?
5 posted on 02/17/2010 7:13:22 AM PST by mlizzy ("Do not wait for leaders; do it alone, person to person" --Mother Teresa.)
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To: mlizzy

HP Lovecraft reference from the “Call of Cthulhu”. Actually pretty funny, even funnier if the fish had an octopus like face.


6 posted on 02/17/2010 7:16:56 AM PST by Feasor13
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To: OB1kNOb

The Durante Fish!...................


7 posted on 02/17/2010 7:18:08 AM PST by Red Badger (Education makes people easy to lead, difficult to drive; easy to govern, but impossible to enslave.)
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To: OB1kNOb

8 posted on 02/17/2010 7:18:33 AM PST by SlowBoat407 (Social Justice is the goal of all liberal legislation.)
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To: OB1kNOb

9 posted on 02/17/2010 7:18:35 AM PST by ravingnutter
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To: OB1kNOb

The Durante Fish!...................

10 posted on 02/17/2010 7:19:05 AM PST by Red Badger (Education makes people easy to lead, difficult to drive; easy to govern, but impossible to enslave.)
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To: ClearCase_guy

I think it's cute!............

11 posted on 02/17/2010 7:21:03 AM PST by Red Badger (Education makes people easy to lead, difficult to drive; easy to govern, but impossible to enslave.)
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To: OB1kNOb

Dude that thing looks like old Clinton crony WEB HUBBELL!


12 posted on 02/17/2010 7:22:47 AM PST by LeonardFMason
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To: mlizzy

From WIKI:

Blobfish are found at depths where the pressure is several dozens of times higher than at sea level, which would likely make gas bladders inefficient. To remain buoyant, the flesh of the blobfish is primarily a gelatinous mass with a density slightly less than water; this allows the fish to float above the sea floor without expending energy on swimming. The relative lack of muscle is not a disadvantage as it primarily swallows edible matter that floats by in front of it.


So it looks like this fish is living Lutefisk..........


13 posted on 02/17/2010 7:23:55 AM PST by Red Badger (Education makes people easy to lead, difficult to drive; easy to govern, but impossible to enslave.)
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To: mlizzy

The allusion is to Cthulhu, and terrible alien creatures living beneath the ocean (as another poster surmised) but since you ask for a translation, it is: “In his house at R’lyeh dead Cthulhu waits dreaming”. The chant doesn’t have great significance, but a nod to Lovecraft is always fun.


14 posted on 02/17/2010 7:26:30 AM PST by ClearCase_guy (I was born in America, but now I live in Declinistan.)
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To: mlizzy

back row third from the right... there he is!!
15 posted on 02/17/2010 7:26:30 AM PST by GeronL (Dignity is earned from yourself. Respect is earned from others.)
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To: Red Badger

perfect. It’s the Ziggy fish


16 posted on 02/17/2010 7:26:47 AM PST by babble-on
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To: GeronL

wow, a new leader


17 posted on 02/17/2010 7:27:35 AM PST by babble-on
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To: mlizzy

"No relation, I promise!!"
18 posted on 02/17/2010 7:29:36 AM PST by GeronL (Dignity is earned from yourself. Respect is earned from others.)
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To: GeronL
"I did not have sexual relations with that fish, Miss Lewinsky"


19 posted on 02/17/2010 7:32:46 AM PST by GeronL (Dignity is earned from yourself. Respect is earned from others.)
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To: SlowBoat407

I think it looks like Barney Frank. He’s a spineless blob too.


20 posted on 02/17/2010 7:39:58 AM PST by peeps36 (Democrats Don't Need No Stinking Input From You Little People)
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To: ClearCase_guy
“Ph’nglui mglw’nafh Cthulhu R’lyeh wgah’nagl fhtagn”

You paged me? :)

21 posted on 02/17/2010 7:53:25 AM PST by lovecraft (Specialization is for insects.)
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To: GeronL
This is supposedly another shot of a blobfish (after following Michael Jackson's example?). Lots of unusual fish at this link.
22 posted on 02/17/2010 7:57:54 AM PST by mlizzy ("Do not wait for leaders; do it alone, person to person" --Mother Teresa.)
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To: mlizzy
Evolution of a Democrat...


23 posted on 02/17/2010 8:02:36 AM PST by ThomasMore (Patrick Henry and Joe Wilson...Patriots past and present!)
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To: ThomasMore

Good job!


24 posted on 02/17/2010 8:04:29 AM PST by mlizzy ("Do not wait for leaders; do it alone, person to person" --Mother Teresa.)
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To: mlizzy

“In R’lyeh, dead Cthulhu lies dreaming.”
or words to that effect.


25 posted on 02/17/2010 8:10:44 AM PST by Little Ray (Madame President sounds really good to me...)
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To: mlizzy

That is just one ugly mug


26 posted on 02/17/2010 8:20:36 AM PST by GeronL (Dignity is earned from yourself. Respect is earned from others.)
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To: OB1kNOb

So ugly it’s cute


27 posted on 02/17/2010 8:31:24 AM PST by Charlespg
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To: Charlespg

How does it taste?


28 posted on 02/17/2010 8:46:04 AM PST by NCC-1701 (ZEROs FAVORITE SONG -- I, ME, MINE -- BY THE BEATLES)
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To: Red Badger

“The relative lack of muscle is not a disadvantage as it primarily swallows edible matter that floats by in front of it.”

DEMOCRAT.


29 posted on 02/17/2010 9:17:31 AM PST by Yehuda (Land of the free, THANKS TO THE BRAVE!)
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To: Yehuda
“The relative lack of muscle is not a disadvantage as it primarily swallows edible matter that floats by in front of it.”

DEMOCRAT.

"Picture them, if you will, floating hungrily, their tiny fins keeping them stable until they strike. With all their boneless goo and slime and passive/aggressive floating, blobfish feeding behavior is remarkably similar to that of a subspecies of far more advanced creatures: American politicians" --from the article.
30 posted on 02/17/2010 10:02:32 AM PST by mlizzy ("Do not wait for leaders; do it alone, person to person" --Mother Teresa.)
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To: ClearCase_guy

That is not dead which can eternal lie.

And with strange aeons even death may die.


31 posted on 02/17/2010 10:07:18 AM PST by ArrogantBustard (Western Civilization is Aborting, Buggering, and Contracepting itself out of existence.)
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To: NCC-1701
How does it taste?

Like a big bowl of slugs sprinkled with salt........

32 posted on 02/17/2010 10:42:36 AM PST by Hot Tabasco (My boomerang won't come back.......)
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To: Hot Tabasco

Sounds yummy! (/sarc)


33 posted on 02/17/2010 10:59:37 AM PST by NCC-1701 (ZEROs FAVORITE SONG -- I, ME, MINE -- BY THE BEATLES)
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To: mlizzy

That will teach me to read the whole article!


34 posted on 02/17/2010 11:11:32 AM PST by Yehuda (Land of the free, THANKS TO THE BRAVE!)
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To: mlizzy

Deep One!!?


35 posted on 02/17/2010 12:52:10 PM PST by Charlespg
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