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Of expressive divorces and stolen childhoods
Menzies House ^ | 7 May, 2010 | Ben-Peter Terpstra

Posted on 05/06/2010 6:44:04 PM PDT by AustralianConservative

No-fault divorces have (as predicted) scarred millions of children across the West. But don’t expect radical feminists and adults-only libertarians to say sorry. They’re never wrong. Or as Barbara Dafoe Whitehead put it in The Divorce Culture: Rethinking Our Commitments to Marriage and Family, “A culture of divorce soothes children with antidepressants, consoles them with storybooks on divorce, and watches over their lives from family court.”

One serious problem: “Our contemporary secular thinking about marriage is a blend of psychotherapy and politics, and its language is one of rights and needs.”

(Excerpt) Read more at menzieshouse.com.au ...


TOPICS: Culture/Society; Philosophy
KEYWORDS: children; divorce; victims
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http://www.menzieshouse.com.au/2010/05/of-expressive-divorces-and-stolen-childhoods-.html
1 posted on 05/06/2010 6:44:05 PM PDT by AustralianConservative
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To: AustralianConservative
That's one of liberalism's objectives, viz. to destroy the family.

Liberalism is anti God, anti family and anti America. It's the bane of civilization.

2 posted on 05/06/2010 6:58:09 PM PDT by LouAvul
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To: AustralianConservative

I had never read the term ‘expressive divorce’ but I suspect that it points to what I find most disturbing about the ‘must-self-actualize-myself’ divorces. The elevation of an adult’s exploration desires over the well being of the children.
I was crushed to hear my friend describe a newish ritual designed to ‘help’ children accept divorce. The parents have a divorce ceremony at home, in front of the kids. In her case, she and her husband each spoke and then formally removed their rings. She said ‘we were all crying, it was very emotional, but if we hadn’t done it, the divorce would have taken place entirely outside of the view of the children and they would keep hoping that maybe mom and dad would get back together. This way, they know it’s really over.’
Well, it just sounds so terribly painful. This is meant to help but HOW can it help? I know my friend was trying to help her kids but the very idea of performing this ‘end’ in front of the kids sounds damaging and I hope I am 100% wrong about this and that it really did do something positive. ****shudder*** Talk about a pain bath for everyone involved. I think my friend will be scarred with the memory of that cermony, but she did it to help her kids adjust!


3 posted on 05/06/2010 6:58:21 PM PDT by ransomnote
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To: AustralianConservative

Decline of the West bookmark.


4 posted on 05/06/2010 7:00:52 PM PDT by IrishCatholic (No local Communist or Socialist Party Chapter? Join the Democrats, it's the same thing!)
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Comment #5 Removed by Moderator

To: AustralianConservative

The sanctimoniously expressed duty of any out of sorts momma to punish dad with a divorce, confident, thanks to predatory lawyers, that a small child leaves her holding a royal flush against any responsible male, is a million after million after million story line in our culture.


6 posted on 05/06/2010 7:07:31 PM PDT by nkycincinnatikid
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To: LouAvul

Karl Marx complained that marriage was the original division of labor.


7 posted on 05/06/2010 7:26:03 PM PDT by ALPAPilot
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To: ALPAPilot
And Margaret Sanger was a fan of Hitler's eugenics and thought abortion would be a solution to the negro problem. She founded Planned Parenthood.

They're all alike. Elitist slugs with no moral compass.

8 posted on 05/06/2010 8:33:02 PM PDT by LouAvul
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To: nkycincinnatikid

Sure. Men are perfect, and women are eeeevil.


9 posted on 05/06/2010 10:12:08 PM PDT by Politicalmom (A racist is a conservative who is winning an argument with a liberal.-FReeper Freespirited)
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To: AustralianConservative

The children have no hope whatsoever. The best thing that can happen to them is a nuclear war which which wipes out all human life. That would be a gift from heaven.


10 posted on 05/07/2010 6:29:12 AM PDT by Soothesayer (The United States of America Rest in Peace November 4 2008)
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To: Politicalmom

Why are the large majority of divorces started by good,upstanding, loving wives that have a replacement “Daddy” lined up before the mean,ugly,repugnant husband is even served with the divorce papers?

I sometimes look at divorces filed in my local paper. It is very rare to see one where the action was started by the husband.


11 posted on 05/07/2010 9:14:13 AM PDT by seemoAR
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To: seemoAR

Stereotype much?

I would assume that women are more likely to leave a marriage if they think they love someone else, and are also more likely to initiate divorce if their husband is cheating. Many men are perfectly happy to stay married and cheat.

That doesn’t mean women are always at fault. I know from personal experience.


12 posted on 05/07/2010 2:44:46 PM PDT by Politicalmom (A racist is a conservative who is winning an argument with a liberal.-FReeper Freespirited)
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To: Politicalmom

Surely you jest. Who do you think the husbands are cheating with if and when they do. Just because a wife accuses a husband of cheating means nothing. My fine ex wife had her legs wrapped around her husband to be before she started the divorce. I did not cheat on her. I guess you believe wives would never cheat or lie.

Some women are perfectly happy to stay married and cheat.


13 posted on 05/07/2010 4:55:29 PM PDT by seemoAR
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To: seemoAR

Oh, please. I refuse to accept that it’s always the woman’s fault, anymore than it is always the man’s fault. You woman haters always blame the woman.


14 posted on 05/07/2010 5:35:30 PM PDT by Politicalmom (A racist is a conservative who is winning an argument with a liberal.-FReeper Freespirited)
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To: seemoAR

And your “argument” ridiculous. It’s just as easy to ask who you think the the wives are cheating with. Anyway, I guess you’ve never heard of “single” people.


15 posted on 05/07/2010 5:37:44 PM PDT by Politicalmom (A racist is a conservative who is winning an argument with a liberal.-FReeper Freespirited)
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To: Politicalmom

Yes I have, I was one twice in my life. I never messed around with married women. Do a little research unless you are afraid of the results. Who files for divorce more, men or women? The women I have known didn’t leave one nest until they had another one set up.

I am thru with you.


16 posted on 05/07/2010 10:45:54 PM PDT by seemoAR
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To: seemoAR

I have news for you. The world doesn’t revolve around you, and your “experience” is necessarily extremely limited.


17 posted on 05/08/2010 8:27:49 AM PDT by Politicalmom (A racist is a conservative who is winning an argument with a liberal.-FReeper Freespirited)
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To: Politicalmom

“I have news for you. The world doesn’t revolve around you, and your “experience” is necessarily extremely limited.”

His experience may be limited, but it is relavent to this thread. Why don’t you share your own personal experience, instead of attacking somebody for sharing theirs?


18 posted on 05/08/2010 8:32:35 AM PDT by stevestras
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To: Politicalmom

His experience isn’t limited.
Almost the same as mine with my last ex.


19 posted on 05/08/2010 8:38:58 AM PDT by RandallFlagg (30-year smoker, E-Cigs helped me quit, and O wants me back smoking again?)
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To: seemoAR; Politicalmom
Who files for divorce more

A totally meaningless statistic, but keep using it if it makes you feel better.

20 posted on 05/08/2010 8:41:28 AM PDT by LuvFreeRepublic (Support our military or leave. I will help you pack BO!)
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