Posted on 06/27/2010 7:35:56 PM PDT by Jet Jaguar
A telling story is unfolding in the Senate race in South Carolina. This one might take the cake, even in a state affectionately known as “The Jerry Springer Show” of politics.
Half-wit Alvin Greene, who ran for the Democratic Senate nomination to challenge sitting (which is about all they do) Sen. Jim “Never Needs Scope” DeMint, R-S.C., won in a landslide. This is the most embarrassing thing to happen in Palmetto State politics in, well, weeks.
Clearly, South Carolina voters do not pay much attention to politics. Politicians know that as long as they do not tinker with the state’s age of consent laws, residents do not get up in arms.
Greene is a semi-literate, unemployed, questionably discharged military man who lives in his parents’ basement. He never campaigned, never gave speeches and had neither a campaign Web site nor even yard signs. Sounds like senatorial timber to me!
He was thrown out of the military in what he calls an “involuntary” discharge. If our political leaders are known for anything, it is their involuntary discharges.
If you have not seen Alvin on TV, just imagine Forrest Gump’s buddy Benjamin Buford “Bubba” Blue, for whom Forrest named his shrimp company after Bubba recited all the culinary variations of shrimp.
Alvin showed early senatorial ambitions when he incurred a felony charge by showing porn on his cell phone to a college girl. That may be a felony in South Carolina, but it’s also the primary reason the iPhone is selling so well in the rest of the country.
We all remember when Republican Gov. Mark Sanford got in trouble for his affair with a hot Argentine news reporter and made that speech where he admitted to the dalliance. Who can forget the awkward conclusion of his press conference when he waited, hand in the air, for some guy to give him a high-five?
It wasn’t so much that Sanford had a girlfriend. This outsourcing-weary, unionized textile state was upset that its governor was sending even mistressing jobs overseas.
Just to show that S.C. is not sexist about extra-marital rumors, the GOP’s current gubernatorial frontrunner, Nikki Haley, has been accused of hanky-panky. Clearly, South Carolina politicians enjoy polling. They even have that “you lie” guy in Congress.
Having South Carolina as the current “pull my finger” state of political shame helps other states deflect attention away from their own foibles. Illinois is grateful.
There have been so many scandals involving politicians that you know we are in trouble when Jesse “The Body” Ventura and Dennis Kucinich are considered our most stable elected officials.
The nomination by his party of Manning, S.C.’s finest is embarrassing to Democrats, and they reacted as they have been conditioned to do: They blamed Republicans. This Manning-churian candidate, the Dems say, was funded by the GOP. As of this writing, no theories have emerged to explain why nearly 60 percent of his state’s Democrats voted for him.
As the third-highest ranking Democrat in Congress and the “go to” guy for screaming racism, Rep. Jim Clyburn, D-S.C., was well positioned to point the Obama finger on this one. As we all know, it would be unthinkable for the Democrats to run an unaccomplished young black candidate with scant credentials, shady funding, nefarious friends from a corrupt state and an almost nonexistent voting record for high office. If Alvin Greene is actually elected, can a Nobel Peace Prize be far behind?
Liberal lapdog Chris “Chill Up My Leg” Matthews opined that this “has the looks of a dirty trick, sort of a Watergate number.” For all you kids out there too young to remember, the Watergate scandal involved the Nixon White House clandestinely funding the campaign entry fee for a Forrest Gump-like, African-American man (although I do not think that term was used back then), with pending porn charges, to run for the Democratic nomination for the U.S. Senate.
Greene defeated Democratic Party-backed Vic Rawl, a former judge and state legislator. I would like to think we are seeing an anti-incumbent sentiment fueled by the tea party movement, but demographic examination of the Democratic voters in South Carolina points to another reason. It does not worry me that these idiot, wannabe politicians run for office. What should bother us all is that we elect them. Maybe we really do get the government we deserve.
This writer ain’t half bad.
Check this out:
“Alvin showed early senatorial ambitions when he incurred a felony charge by showing porn on his cell phone to a college girl.’”
And...
“It wasn’t so much that Sanford had a girlfriend. This outsourcing-weary, unionized textile state was upset that its governor was sending even mistressing jobs overseas.”
Goober does as Goober is!
I’ll take Alvin over Nancy anyday. Nancy got agenda.
As a Floridian, I want to thank South Carolinian Democrats for taking some of the heat off our Palm Beach Democrats that can’t follow a simple arrow.
We know that he is at least bright enough to know how to use a cell phone.8(
Pretty close.
I liked the snark about pols being safe if they left the age of consent laws alone.
A Google search indicated that SC is very unusual in that the age of consent in set in the SC Constitution. It is 14 years of age.
However, there may have been a law raising it to 16, but the exact status of the law seems debatable.
Still, SC is very conservative.
Good for SC.
You make a subjective assertion without replicable data, and take a needless punch at a man. This can only generate sympathy for him We’ve seen five minutes of excerpted sound bites. Is he unprepared? Almost certainly. Is he any more or less intelligent than Sheldon Whitehorse or Al Franken?
I think the establishment candidate had more problems than we may see.
Ping!
I've heard him interviewed by Mark Levin and Rusty Humphries, both of whom were very respectful and non-threatening to the guy. If you haven't heard Alvin Greene interviewed, then I can perhaps understand your overweening compassion for the man.
He has a sub-par intelligence level. I'm very sorry, but that is unquestionably the case. In no way, shape, or form should this person be making a run for the US Senate, and it's sad that the Democrat party didn't weed him out sooner.
Is he any more or less intelligent than Sheldon Whitehorse or Al Franken?
I'm afraid that he's not even half as intelligent as either of those men, and that's saying something.
Listen - I have nothing against Alvin Greene. I'm simply making an honest observation about his unfortunate lack of intellect. It's apparent that he's embarked upon a course that is far, far beyond his capabilities.
I ask you again...have you heard him interviewed?
I had a 22 year old guy at work tell me McChystal is a bushbot. He was a ginger.
You know, I didn't check the byline when I started reading the article, and actually thought that it was Ann Coulter. The style is pretty unmistakable.
You've got me almost curious enough to go grab Ann's article to compare it with this one.
As we all know, it would be unthinkable for the Democrats to run an unaccomplished young black candidate with scant credentials, shady funding, nefarious friends from a corrupt state and an almost nonexistent voting record for high office. If Alvin Greene is actually elected, can a Nobel Peace Prize be far behind?
The fact is, Greene happens when you substitute the election for the literacy test.
I hate to say it but in my estimation at least 10% of Congress has a low intellect level and exhibit it regularly. Maybe they represent their constituents better because they are closer in intellect to them? Real Representative government in action.
Should we have an intelligence test for Congressmen or for voters? IDIOCRACY is what we are becoming, just look at the White House. I’m still waiting for Guam to roll over and capsize due to too many people and I’m looking for Arizona on the map near Canada. How many Congressmen can balance their own checkbook much less our governments? How many do their own tax returns? ZERO. (Timmy Geithner does his so he can cheat)
We should return to property owner only or taxpayers only can vote. If people don’t have enough intelligence and ambition (or luck) to amass some self sustaining property or income why should they be allowed to vote on taking it away from those that do so and give it to those that can’t or won’t? It is this flaw in our government that might be our downfall.
At least when he votes retarded and says retarded things he will have an excuse.
Mark Steyn’s got competition!
Her column is worth a read. I'm in full agreement with her conclusion: that Alvin Greene is clearly more qualified to be a senator than Patrick Leahy
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