Jimmy Carter: Can't Stop the Typing (Hilarious Takedown)

Wall Street Journal ^ | 10/9/2010 | Joe Queenan

[mojito]

In November 1980, the American people made a disastrous decision whose reverberations are still being felt today. Rather than biting the bullet and re-electing the glum, uncharismatic, hopeless Jimmy Carter to the White House—thereby ensuring that he would return to Plains, Ga., at the conclusion of his second term and keep his blabberpuss shut—they turfed him out into the street.

That made him mad. Really mad. By giving one of America's dopiest presidents the bum's rush, the American people ensured that Mr. Carter would spend the rest of his life trying to even the score, trying to persuade them that they had made a huge mistake when they cast their lot with Ronald Reagan, trying to convince them that they were a bunch of jerks.

The particular form of retribution Carter chose was as sinister and cruel as any known to man. He took his pen in hand and began to write books. Long books. Boring books. Dour books. Yes, long, boring, dour, numerous books.

[Citizen Soldier]

I can top that, my idiot brother named one of his sons Carter after jimmy.

[Shellback Chuck]

Any books about rabbits?

[Lurker]

Mr. Carter inhabits some weird parallel universe with people like George Foreman, who were despised when they were at their peak and then manufactured a touchy-feely post-career aura that made some people forget how much they disliked them when they were famous. But George Foreman, unlike Jimmy Carter, is funny. And George Foreman could throw a punch.

Mr. Foreman invented a product used by millions of happy consumers all over the planet. All Carter can claim is a legacy of misery, failure, and death.

[greyfoxx39]

The Oval Office equivalent of the Edsel

Hilarious political ping

[Timocrat]

But there are some people who take an interest in the Edsel.

You must admit that there is a certain ghoulish fascination in watching an ex-President make an abject fool of himself while he believes he is being taken seriously.

[Vigilanteman]

I sent a $1 donation to the Carter center once simply because Jimmy was giving away a free gift with any donation. I haven't contributed a dime since, but I still get a Christmas Card from him every year plus all the newsletters and pleas for money.

If he'd only stuck to hammering nails for Habitat for Humanity . . .

[sodpoodle]

Stupid on a Sandwich;)

Not sure that we, as a society, have overcome being seduced by a toothy grin, a ‘nuclear submarine officer’ rep and a sweater.

I do believe the rabbit attack was his waterloo. Rabbits: quiet but deadly;)

[Vinnie]

George Foreman despised? Sorry, I don’t recall that era.

I do recall Foreman walking around the boxing ring after winning the 1968 Olympic heavyweight gold metal with an American flag in his glove.
Some black athletes were giving the Black Panther fist at the games.

Other than that, the article rightly skewers Carter.

[CharlieOK1]

Wow! Thanks for that link!!!

[GraceCoolidge]

You should read P.J. O’Rourke’s hilarious review of “Everything to Gain” by Jimmy Carter. You can find it here on FR. Title is “The Very Deep Thoughts of Jimmy and Rosalynn Carter.” Sorry I don’t know how to post a link...

[DPMD]

Sorry, I don’t recall that era.

Nor do I. However, after the loss to Ali, his career spiraled downward, and he became kind of surly, one of the low points coming on a night when he fought three other guys in succession in a kind of pathetic circus atmosphere. When he lost to Jimmy Young of Philly, in a 15 round decision, he just kind of gave it up.

But despised? No. Even less so, now.

[Yaelle]

Pretty funny!

But they left out his hatred of Israel and other places where you might find Joooos, and his love of terrorists, as long as they will help get rid of the aforementioned meddlesome people.

[dead]

In his heyday in the 70s, Foreman was certainly the "bad guy" in the heavyweight division.

He was the surly, big, mean and angry foil to Ali's safe, funny and friendly style. Ali was about speed and art, Foreman was about hammering destruction.

It was kinda shocking to watch Foreman morph into the sweet lovable teddybear guy.

[Wuli]

Jimmy Carter has spent his post-Presidential life seeking the public respect he thinks was stolen from him in his loss of the Presidency to Reagan.

His arrogant, egotistical manner in which he has gone about it has shown less respect to the Office of the President, than any modern former President ever has; which simply continues to demonstrate why he gets all the lack of respect he deserves.

[Arrowhead1952]

BFL

[Domangart]

He has the biggest tell when he is going to tell a lie. His head dips and his eyes flash when he begins the lie.

[Luke21]

Yeah, he reminds me of the Budweiser lizards whenever he starts one of his whoppers,

[hinckley buzzard]

Right. Carter was "a nuclear submarine officer" just like obama was "a constitutional scholar."