Kid 1: It's happy!
Kid 2: It's fun!
All Three Kids: It's Happy Fun Poll!
Announcer: Yes, it's Happy Fun Poll! The toy sensation that's sweeping the nation! Only $14.95 at participating stores! Get one today!
Warning: Pregnant women, the elderly, and children under 10 should avoid prolonged exposure to Happy Fun Poll.
Caution: Happy Fun Poll may suddenly accelerate to dangerous speeds.
Happy Fun Poll contains a liquid core, which, if exposed due to rupture, should not be touched, inhaled, or looked at.
Do not use Happy Fun Poll on concrete.
Discontinue use of Happy Fun Poll if any of the following occurs:
- itching
- vertigo
- dizziness
- tingling in extremities
- loss of balance or coordination
- slurred speech
- temporary blindness
- profuse sweating
- or heart palpitations.
If Happy Fun Poll begins to smoke, get away immediately. Seek shelter and cover head.
Happy Fun Poll may stick to certain types of skin.
When not in use, Happy Fun Poll should be returned to its special container and kept under refrigeration. Failure to do so relieves the makers of Happy Fun Poll, Wacky Products Incorporated, and its parent company, Global Chemical Unlimited, of any and all liability.
Ingredients of Happy Fun Poll include an unknown glowing green substance which fell to Earth, presumably from outer space.
Happy Fun Poll has been shipped to our troops in Saudi Arabia and is being dropped by our warplanes on Iraq.
Do not taunt Happy Fun Poll.
Happy Fun Poll comes with a lifetime warranty.
Announcer: Happy Fun Poll! Accept no substitutes!