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Why Did The Occupier Cross The Road? (People's Cube Humor)
The People's Cube ^ | 11-11-11 | Dr. W. S. Palimpsest

Posted on 11/14/2011 11:37:09 AM PST by tcrlaf

Why did the Occupier cross the road?

Because his Mom called and said, “It’s time to come home, honey.” Because ‘Ketchup’ broke her glasses during a fit of righteous crying and had to go to Lynz-Krafterz Because some radicals thought “free love” meant “unsolicited surprise sex” Because three homeless guys were occupying his tent "Help, police..." Because a few "more-equal-than-thous" (aka, Party people) appropriated [sic, smoked up] his stach for the Greater Good -- he had to score another bag of kind bud Because the police car looked like a port-o-john

Help me out, comrades! What are some other reasons that would compel an Occupier to cross the road?


TOPICS: Culture/Society; Miscellaneous; News/Current Events; Political Humor/Cartoons; Politics/Elections
KEYWORDS: bloggersandpersonal; chat; cross; occupy; occutard; road
Other reasons why the Occutard crossed the road, stolen from The People's Cube:

-because the free free-range Tofu casserole was being served there. -because the free condoms were there -because the free clothing give away was there -because the free Ben & Jerry's cart was there -because the free STD clinic was there -because the free forum for Womyn 's Studies and Queer Musicology majors was there. -because his **** was stuck inside the chicken. -to get away from the free soap. -because when you live in a country where opportunities are for anyone who will work, you cross the road to get to "the other side".

His stocks in McDonalds were dropping because of all of the free food being passed out...

Waterproof sleepingbags finally went on sale...

Free clinic opened for STD testing...

The resume submitted to Bank of America in February finally got him an interview...

His law school acceptance letter came in...

- because the IPhone 4s went on sale across the street. - to deposit $20,000 in Wells Fargo Bank. - because Michael Moore erected a circus tent on his spot. - because he/she had nothing better to do.

1 posted on 11/14/2011 11:37:14 AM PST by tcrlaf
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To: tcrlaf; SpinnerWebb

I want to live in a world where a chicken can cross the road without having its motives questioned.


2 posted on 11/14/2011 11:47:23 AM PST by tx_eggman (Liberalism is only possible in that moment when a man chooses Barabas over Christ.)
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To: tcrlaf

My thoughts...

He saw a cop he wanted to throw feces at
The other side seemed have “a better energy”
His hacky-sack got away from him


3 posted on 11/14/2011 11:59:17 AM PST by Skeez (O)
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To: tcrlaf

My thoughts...

He saw a cop he wanted to throw feces at
The other side seemed to have “a better energy”
His hacky-sack got away from him


4 posted on 11/14/2011 11:59:34 AM PST by Skeez (O)
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To: tcrlaf
Because the occupiers had a schism between the body lce and the drug resistant tuberculosis factions.
5 posted on 11/14/2011 12:01:07 PM PST by KarlInOhio (Herman Cain: possibly the escapee most dangerous to the Democrats since Frederick Douglass.)
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To: tcrlaf

To prove “There is No ‘Other Side’”!


6 posted on 11/14/2011 12:07:10 PM PST by G Larry (Catholic Conservative Supporting Israel!)
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To: tx_eggman
I want to live in a world where a chicken can cross the road without having its motives questioned.

Why?

; )

7 posted on 11/14/2011 12:09:46 PM PST by Talisker (History will show the Illuminati won the ultimate Darwin Award.)
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To: tcrlaf

He ran out of potential rape victims.


8 posted on 11/14/2011 12:12:53 PM PST by gitmo (Hatred of those who think differently is the left's unifying principle.-Ralph Peters NY Post)
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To: FReepers; everyone; All



FReepathon Day 45 ... Please Contribute!



9 posted on 11/14/2011 12:15:58 PM PST by onyx (PLEASE SUPPORT FREE REPUBLIC BY DONATING NOW! Sarah's New Ping List - tell me if you want on it.)
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To: tcrlaf

It was the only way to move further to the left.


10 posted on 11/14/2011 12:24:55 PM PST by CrazyIvan (Obama's birth certificate was found stapled to Soros's receipt.)
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To: CrazyIvan

To show the raccoon that it could be done. (old midwest joke)


11 posted on 11/14/2011 12:27:28 PM PST by CrazyIvan (Obama's birth certificate was found stapled to Soros's receipt.)
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To: tx_eggman

The Occupier crossed the road to show the opossum how to cross the road.


12 posted on 11/14/2011 12:29:32 PM PST by GladesGuru (In a society predicated upon freedom, it is necessary to examine principles."...the public interest)
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To: tx_eggman

The chicken crossed the road to show the opossum that it actually could be done.


13 posted on 11/14/2011 12:33:32 PM PST by MrB (The difference between a Humanist and a Satanist - the latter knows whom he's working for)
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To: gitmo

I believe the article poster said it a bit more delicately -

“unsolicited surprise sex”


14 posted on 11/14/2011 12:34:28 PM PST by MrB (The difference between a Humanist and a Satanist - the latter knows whom he's working for)
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To: tcrlaf

Because Barbra Streisand was going to give a concert
To see what the big blue horse was all about
Some Indians were giving out free blankets


15 posted on 11/14/2011 12:40:01 PM PST by firebrand (It's almost too late.)
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To: tcrlaf

Because some one elses dollar bill was on the other side?


16 posted on 11/14/2011 12:45:15 PM PST by THE_RAIDER (http://www.redstate.com/erick/2011/10/05/the-occupy-wall-street-fools/)
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17 posted on 11/14/2011 1:10:20 PM PST by RedMDer (Forward With Confidence!)
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To: tcrlaf

— He didn’t. He just sat in his tent and beat on his bongo all day.
— Because he was tired of hearing all those foul four-letter words like “work”, “jobs”, and “soap.”
— Because someone on the first side offered him a job.
— Because his mind was wandering and his body followed.


18 posted on 11/14/2011 1:27:09 PM PST by IronJack (=)
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To: G Larry

One occupier to another across the street(shouting):

“How do I get to the other side of the road?”
.
.
“You ARE on the other side of the road!”


19 posted on 11/14/2011 1:37:01 PM PST by 21twelve ("We can go from boom to bust, from dreams to a bowl of dust....and another lost generation.")
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To: MrB

LOL


20 posted on 11/14/2011 3:01:34 PM PST by gitmo (Hatred of those who think differently is the left's unifying principle.-Ralph Peters NY Post)
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To: tx_eggman
*** I want to live in a world where a chicken can cross the road without having its motives questioned. ***

What? Are you 'series'? Chickens are inherently evil and their motive must always be questioned.

The thing is that Chickens know they're descendants of Dinosaurs and are ticked that they're not huge and terrifying any longer and can't roam the land killing things at will to munch on like 'great-grandpa' T-Rex did.

So if you ever do see a Chicken ON the other side of the road get your biggest gun asap, as it's definitely up to no good (thank God they can't fly or we'd really be screwed).

21 posted on 11/14/2011 3:18:33 PM PST by Condor51 (Yo Hoffa, so you want to 'take out conservatives'. Well okay Jr - I'm your Huckleberry)
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To: tcrlaf

To cash his dividend check!


22 posted on 11/16/2011 11:17:10 PM PST by Yehuda (Land of the free, THANKS TO THE BRAVE!)
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