Skip to comments.Secret document reveals why BMW drivers are asshats
Posted on 12/21/2011 12:23:43 AM PST by Impala64ssa
A leaked document has revealed that the asshattery of BMW drivers may be more than coincidence. Failing to use turn signals, cutting off other drivers, tailgating, flipping the bird and other affronts to road civility have become indelibly associated with the Bavarian Marque. Why? According to the document, it's all part of a totally illegal customer loyalty scheme.
This template document, issued to all BMW dealers (click the image below to expand), comes to us from an anonymous informant known only as "The Whistleblower." It clearly outlines a list of driving behaviors, recorded on the black boxes that have been standard on all new BMWs for several years now and translated into points.
Accumulated points can then be traded for the kind of fabulous prizes middle management Bimmer drivers most covet, such as anger management classes and male botox injections.
(Excerpt) Read more at jalopnik.com ...
Lately, on my early morning drive to work, any kind of pickup, new or old, seems to be at least 5 mi/h under the speed limit. Used to be they would be flying and changing four lanes back and forth at a shot. Driving like Beamer pilots, essentially. (I own a pickup BTW, but don't use it for everyday driving.)
Once I came up on a goose that was standing in the middle of my lane. It was not about to move, and as I went around it, it stood there honking at me!
I’d much rather have useless signals than people not using them when needed or never using them at all.
Knowing what the other guy is going to do comes in very handy.
One thing that really gets me is the following. I’m driving along at the end of a long line of cars. There are no cars behind me for a mile. Some idiot pulls out of a street or drive to jump in ahead of me. He had to have saved at least 3 seconds on his trip.
I’m sorry I missed *that* wild ride....LOL
I’ve been jammin’ to Uriah Heep on YouTube.
[too lazy to get up and get my CDs or iPod]...;D
Now to wind down with a little Trower.
When I was 12, I got a “portable” [friggin’ huge] 8 track player I took everywhere with me.
Had a case for the tapes and everything....looked like I was going backpacking all the time.
[God bless whomever invented MP3s...toting around 7500 songs on 8 tracks would kill me]
Or the opposite.
Around here we have turn lanes in the middle of the street. Too often, while in the left lane, someone will put on their left turn signal, almost come to a complete stop, while slowly (and I mean slowly) creeping into the turn lane, only fully being in it when they have to actually make the turn. Meanwhile, all the cars behind them are slowed to a crawl while the turn lane remains wide open...
Then we have the jokers in the right lane, who, on noticing a car slowing down in the left lane to take the above stated left turn, will slow down to match the speed of that guy turning left! I guess it’s instinctual, as they don’t want to get caught overtaking in the right lane, which used to be illegal.
It's an Eos (or an Eos concept car). But speaking of Phaetons, this video shows them being built in Germany, the factory is incredible.
Would you believe hardwood floors in a factory?
Another thing. I was taught that if you want to turn left at a green traffic light you are supposed to pull into the intersection a bit short of the center and wait for oncoming traffic to pass. Then you turn. This way, at least one or two cars can make the turn.
Lately, I’ve been behind a lot of people who wait behind the crosswalk and don’t get to turn. I’ve been behind people who have gone through two lights before they could turn. Happened just the other day.
Don’t they teach this in drivers ed? Did they change the rules and not tell me?
I don't know how many times I've been stuck behind Granny Gums tootling down the road at 25mph in a 40 or 50 mph zone. And when they turn, you might as well put it in park and whip out a magazine, cause you're gonna be there for a while.
Anytime I see a car up ahead that has a handicap sticker hanging from the rearview mirror or that familiar wheelchair on the license plate, I put any ideas about getting to where I'm going on time completely out of my mind.
How about the idiots who use turn signals when there is no need for one. Such as they are in a place where they have to make a turn. My observation is that same people fail to put on their headlights when it rains. Plus they dont signal when they should at least as a courtesy/heads up to others.
Hilarious. Stressing about folks who use turn signals too much. Try the decaf.
It’s called force of habit, Dennis. I catch myself doing it sometimes when I turn into the parking garage at work for no other reason than I am making a right turn where the right turn is the only option.
I am a bit concerned that you have followed enough of the unnecessary turn signal users to come up with the theory that they also don’t signal when they should and don’t turn their lights on when it rans. Again, try the decaf and maybe consider letting it go.
Because they know the radar gun will be pointed at them first.
So true. The fastest vehicle from Point A to Point B is probably something like a gray-green Subaru Forester with a thick coat of dirt. Add the WRX model's go-fast bits and pieces to that mini-wagon and you'd have a road-going rally car that the cops would tend to ignore. Sort of like the "Jackie Chan" entry in the original Cannonball Run, minus the rocket engine.
Me too - at least we will never forget to use them if it's automatic (besides, in most locales it's law anyway - a turn is a turn).
That must explain the idiot in my subdivision who has a beautiful M3 convertible and, despite keeping it detailed like a show car, has the entire rear window covered (neatly) in duct tape. He must be saving up for the repair before the lease expires.
I bought a VW Touareg TDI - we r not allowed to drive like BMW or Mercedes drivers.
I've been wondering the same thing lately. Is it from all the signal cameras that get you if you are in the intersection when the light turns red?
drive the speed limit in the FAST lane...
You must be referring to the Prius drivers. They should do us all a favor and save the planet from the right hand lane.
Well, the BMW driver who ran into the rear of the F250 near downtown FW at 2:30 yesterday will be whining to the repair man for a while! Plastic grill meet immovable object!
“Who are the people that flip on the right hand blinker and then make a left?”
Residents of Sun City.
If $150k isn't considered a decent household income in your neighborhood -- well, I sure wish I could afford to live there!
Around here, if there are 3 lanes, the center lane is always the slowest.
Except when there’s an exit coming up. Then the right lane backs up as idiots drop down to 10 under the limit so they don’t miss the exit.
If only it did not have the VW emblem on the front.
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