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Good News Everyone...Feds vs.Zombies:CDC officially denies Zombie Apocalypse
RT ^ | 6/2/2012 | RT

Posted on 06/03/2012 5:01:22 PM PDT by Dallas59



"The Government has officially denied that there is any Zombie outbreak..."


The US Center for Disease Control has been forced to address the American public in the wake of internet rumors of a possible ‘zombie apocalypse”.

It’s hard to say which is more ‘out there’: that people believe there might be a virus that reanimates dead people, or that a federal agency actually weighed in on the issue in earnest.

The CDC has previously run a few tongue-in-cheek campaigns about zombies, using the popular theme to get the public prepared for “anything”. As the agency’s director says, “if you are generally well equipped to deal with a zombie apocalypse, you will be prepared for a hurricane, pandemic, earthquake, or terrorist attack".

But it’s now found itself in an unusual spot: having to treat the matter seriously. CDC spokesman David Daigle said the agency “does not know of a virus or condition that would reanimate the dead (or one that would present zombie-like symptoms)”.

(Excerpt) Read more at rt.com ...


TOPICS: Crime/Corruption; Government; Miscellaneous
KEYWORDS: cdc; feds; zday; zombie; zombieapocalypse

1 posted on 06/03/2012 5:01:37 PM PDT by Dallas59
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To: Kartographer

(whew) Prepper Ping ;)


2 posted on 06/03/2012 5:04:54 PM PDT by Uncle Ike (Rope is cheap, and there are lots of trees...)
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Bookmarking for ZPL when I get home from work.


3 posted on 06/03/2012 5:08:24 PM PDT by RandallFlagg (Look for the union label, then buy elsewhere.)
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To: Dallas59
Have they seen the upper house of congress?

/johnny

4 posted on 06/03/2012 5:14:01 PM PDT by JRandomFreeper (Gone Galt)
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To: Uncle Ike

5 posted on 06/03/2012 5:14:10 PM PDT by Dallas59 (President Robert Gibbs 2009-2011)
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To: Dallas59

Mr. Poppo of Florida would argue otherwise.

If he still had a mouth to speak with...


6 posted on 06/03/2012 5:18:47 PM PDT by Molon Labbie (Prep. Now. Live Healthy, take your Shooting Iron daily.)
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To: Dallas59

Don’t know whether to laugh, or cry because people are so FREAKIN STUPID.


7 posted on 06/03/2012 5:22:26 PM PDT by Lazamataz (People who resort to Godwin's Law are just like Hitler.)
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To: Lazamataz

The zombies were playing baseball until some idiot
set up a whole head Barbecue down the street and
they had to call the game on account of Brain.


8 posted on 06/03/2012 5:25:23 PM PDT by tet68 ( " We would not die in that man's company, that fears his fellowship to die with us...." Henry V.)
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To: Dallas59
CDC officially denies Zombie Apocalypse

"When they tell you not to panic, that's when you run."


9 posted on 06/03/2012 5:48:39 PM PDT by UCANSEE2 (Lame and ill-informed post)
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To: Dallas59

It won’t be walking dead. It’ll be a virus that causes people to be brain dead but retain the instincts to forage and eat. They’ll mostly be democrats because a very weak virus will do the job


10 posted on 06/03/2012 5:52:24 PM PDT by Terry Mross ("It happened. And we let it happen." Peter Griffin - FAMILY GUY)
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To: Terry Mross
It won’t be walking dead. It’ll be a virus

Or a fungus, like this one:

http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/2879822/posts

Zombie-ant fungus, which invades an ant's brain and causes it to march to its death at a mass grave near the ant colony, where the fungus spores erupt out of the ant's head.

The thread is complete with gross pictures!

11 posted on 06/03/2012 6:03:46 PM PDT by lonevoice (Klepto Baracka Marxo, impeach we much.)
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To: Lazamataz

Ping of interest.


12 posted on 06/03/2012 6:13:16 PM PDT by Travis McGee (www.EnemiesForeignAndDomestic.com)
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To: Dallas59
Oh really?

then why did the CDC print this?!!

http://www.cdc.gov/phpr/zombies/#/page/1

13 posted on 06/03/2012 6:20:09 PM PDT by uglybiker (nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-BATMAN!)
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To: Lazamataz
Don’t know whether to laugh, or cry because people are so FREAKIN STUPID.

Don't laugh... November 6th is their big "coming out" day (Zombies AND stupid people... the only question is how much overlap).

14 posted on 06/03/2012 6:28:10 PM PDT by Ezekiel (The Obama-nation began with the Inauguration of Desolation.)
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To: Dallas59


15 posted on 06/03/2012 7:15:43 PM PDT by Chode (American Hedonist - *DTOM* -ww- NO Pity for the LAZY)
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To: Dallas59

LOL! The zombies of the Federal government, the ones that feed off tax payers, are swearing up and down there is no such thing as a zombie. ;)


16 posted on 06/03/2012 7:22:16 PM PDT by SaraJohnson
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To: Dallas59

The official statement should note that:

1) Zombieism is not sexually transmissible, nor is it caused by a mutated form of herpes simplex and ebola.

2) Nor is zombieism caused by an antibiotic resistant bacteria like the flesh eating bacillus.

3) NASA has confirmed that no zombie causing pathogen has been returned to Earth by a deep space probe, nor have any astronauts been liquified in their own space suits aboard the ISS.

4) There is absolutely no truth to the rumor that a major US city will soon be sterilized by a nuclear detonation to prevent the spread a zombie plague that isn’t happening.

That should answer any questions.


17 posted on 06/03/2012 7:26:15 PM PDT by yefragetuwrabrumuy
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To: Dallas59

I used to think that this Zombie Apocalypse stuff was funny until I realized that it is an analogy to a wide-scale economic collapse. Masses of starving, unprepared refugees migrating out in search of food and supplies. Prepared people will either need to dissuade (or kill) these hungry masses from taking their supplies or they will become a part of the starving masses themselves. I now find this topic very disturbing as I haven’t yet thought of a strategy for how I could provide for my family’s well being and still live up to the virtues of my Christian faith.


18 posted on 06/03/2012 7:29:26 PM PDT by Ronaldus Magnus
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To: Dallas59

” the agency “does not know of a virus or condition that would reanimate the dead (or one that would present zombie-like symptoms)”.”

You mean like Democrats?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m6syRRHTTic


19 posted on 06/03/2012 7:30:31 PM PDT by HereInTheHeartland (We are the 53%. 47% of Americans pay no taxes; end the free ride...)
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To: Dallas59

Look for the new anti bullying campaign to focus on zombies.


20 posted on 06/03/2012 7:33:13 PM PDT by HereInTheHeartland (We are the 53%. 47% of Americans pay no taxes; end the free ride...)
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To: HereInTheHeartland

You gotta like that Bob Hope...a man before his time. I’d say DIMocRATs.


21 posted on 06/03/2012 7:33:25 PM PDT by hal ogen (First Amendment or Reeducation Camp?)
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To: HereInTheHeartland

You gotta like that Bob Hope...a man before his time. I’d say DIMocRATs.


22 posted on 06/03/2012 7:34:21 PM PDT by hal ogen (First Amendment or Reeducation Camp?)
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To: Ronaldus Magnus

Laudable thinking.
Rice and flour are cheap. $17 for 50 pounds at Costco.
Cooking pots are $1 at various “dollar stores”.
Matches are cheap on bulk packs of small boxes.
Bottled water (half liter or one gallon) can be cheap if you look.
Plastic bags are almost free.
You can make up little charity kits for a couple bucks each. It’s something to give the desperate, while not impacting care of your own.


23 posted on 06/03/2012 7:49:16 PM PDT by ctdonath2 ($1 meals: http://abuckaplate.blogspot.com)
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To: Dallas59
CDC graphic novel: Preparedness 101: Zombie Pandemic (PDF)
24 posted on 06/03/2012 7:56:03 PM PDT by ctdonath2 ($1 meals: http://abuckaplate.blogspot.com)
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To: Ronaldus Magnus

If you are a Christian you have a clear answer. Prepare the best you can and pray unceasingly. Trust God to do the rest


25 posted on 06/03/2012 8:01:00 PM PDT by Mom MD (The country needs Obamacare like Nancy Pelosi needs a Halloween mask)
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To: Molon Labbie

Rev.Al said there was no reason to kill a black man for eating a cracker..


26 posted on 06/03/2012 8:53:38 PM PDT by baddog 219
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To: CholeraJoe; Delta 21; Nikas777; NoAmnesty; Yorlik803; TheOldLady; The Comedian; OB1kNOb; ...

27 posted on 06/04/2012 4:50:23 AM PDT by RandallFlagg (Look for the union label, then buy elsewhere.)
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To: Ronaldus Magnus
I haven’t yet thought of a strategy for how I could provide for my family’s well being and still live up to the virtues of my Christian faith.

Teach enough people to prepare in advance and you can preempt the starving crowds.

The Mormons can give you a lot of useful information and tips on how to do this...

28 posted on 06/04/2012 7:25:29 AM PDT by null and void (Day 1231 of our ObamaVacation from reality [and what dark chill/is gathering still/before the storm])
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To: Ezekiel
Don't laugh... November 6th is their big "coming out" day (Zombies AND stupid people... the only question is how much overlap).

Why do you think Holder is trying to keep Florida from removing dead voters from their rolls?

29 posted on 06/04/2012 7:28:55 AM PDT by null and void (Day 1231 of our ObamaVacation from reality [and what dark chill/is gathering still/before the storm])
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To: Dallas59
Photobucket
30 posted on 06/04/2012 3:10:36 PM PDT by DogByte6RER ("Loose lips sink ships")
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To: Dallas59
Zombies
31 posted on 06/04/2012 3:14:42 PM PDT by DogByte6RER ("Loose lips sink ships")
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To: JRandomFreeper

Oh, sure, believe the government that Zombies aren’t on the loose? Go ahead, believe the government and get your brains/face eaten.

Still think broccoli outside would keep them away.


32 posted on 06/04/2012 4:14:52 PM PDT by Marcella (God wouldn't vote for Romney so I won't, either.)
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To: Marcella
Actually, given the choice between congress and zombies?

Hang on... I'm thinking...

Wait....

33 posted on 06/04/2012 4:25:10 PM PDT by JRandomFreeper (Gone Galt)
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To: Marcella
Still thinking, and I'm leaning toward zombies....I have a solution for that...

Give me a bit...

34 posted on 06/04/2012 4:55:51 PM PDT by JRandomFreeper (Gone Galt)
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To: Marcella
Having given it some thought. I'd rather have zombies than a congress.

That's my final answer.

/johnny

35 posted on 06/04/2012 5:06:29 PM PDT by JRandomFreeper (Gone Galt)
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To: JRandomFreeper

You’re right. Zombies are more dependable - we know how they operate. If Zombies attacked congress, they would still be hungry because there aren’t many brains there - it’s mostly empty space in those heads.

Thanks for thinking that long about this problem - I like you, Johnny, you’re a special case. Would like to have had you for a patient (I dealt with mental disorders).


36 posted on 06/04/2012 5:55:11 PM PDT by Marcella (God wouldn't vote for Romney so I won't, either.)
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To: Marcella
I'll take that as a compliment, regardless of how you meant it.

On the far side... after it's all over but the yelling.... the ones that survived are the sane ones.

/johny

37 posted on 06/04/2012 6:13:05 PM PDT by JRandomFreeper (Gone Galt)
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