The sad thing is, this portion of your parody...
“Talent, I say, in championing legislation that will give billionaires untold trillions of dollars in tax cuts, destroy Medicare and Medicare, starve the poor and elderly in doing away with Food Stamps, remove from the voter rolls all Blacks, Hispanics and Gays. And finally, Ryan will ramp up the continuing total war the GOP has on women and their reproductive rights.”....
...is probably not too far from what Obama would/will say. And the lapdog media will report such words in a favorable light, and the uninformed public will believe it, because “it’s on TV ya’know”.
Too late!
The White House just came out with exactly that response.