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Parents ask: Should we wait for our son to come out or ask him ourselves if hes gay?
Washington Post ^ | 6/23/14 | Petrow

Posted on 06/24/2014 6:43:05 PM PDT by mgist

Dear Civilities: My husband and I have a tween son whom we can easily imagine, one day, telling us that he is gay. Or perhaps not; we don’t know his orientation yet, and either way is fine. We love him unconditionally and this is not an issue. My question is about how to handle that conversation if and when he chooses to start it. Or should we ask him? I don’t want to say the wrong thing, omit the right thing or suggest that something so important to him is not an issue for us. As a parent, what should we say and not say during this conversation? — Gina P.

A: Although you don’t know your son’s sexual orientation yet, I applaud your question about how to handle “the coming-out talk,” the goal of which is to make sure that he feels your love and support. Frankly, I wish every parent of every child thought along these same lines. Because the real question is: How do I raise a child who will know he’s loved, whether LGBT or straight, and who accepts all others regardless of their sexual identity?

So, the best thing you could do for your son will take place before the talk, and that’s to be matter-of-fact about being gay. Watch “Modern Family” together and talk positively about the characters. When you hear that yet another state has legalized same-sex marriage , chat about it over dinner and celebrate the news. In fact, the supper table can help convey your attitudes and perspectives on world news in general, which will reinforce your values to your son. Follow my parents’ “open-table policy” and show your son that you are welcoming of all good people.

(Excerpt) Read more at washingtonpost.com ...


TOPICS: Government
KEYWORDS: gatlgbt; homosexualagenda; obama
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Welcome to Obama's America.
1 posted on 06/24/2014 6:43:06 PM PDT by mgist
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To: mgist

“My son hears voices and refuses to bathe or go near water. He harms himself and tortures small animals. Sometimes he talks about burning down our house. He giggles when he talks bout that. My question is simple: How do I tell him that I love him just the way he is and would never want him to break free of his mental illness?”


2 posted on 06/24/2014 6:46:01 PM PDT by ClearCase_guy ("Harvey Dent, can we trust him?" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HBsdV--kLoQ)
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To: mgist

A “tween” is defined as between ages 10-12 by the way.

I have a tween daughter and that is not a conversation I would have with her, unless I was a pedeophile.


3 posted on 06/24/2014 6:46:07 PM PDT by mgist (.)
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To: mgist

Just leave a cucumber on his night stand. If it is still there the next morning then he is normal.


4 posted on 06/24/2014 6:46:33 PM PDT by Deathtomarxists (obama has a stinky stick)
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To: ClearCase_guy

Emrace your killer insticts son. If it feels good do it Jeffrey Dahmer.


5 posted on 06/24/2014 6:47:11 PM PDT by mgist (.)
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To: mgist

If he doesn’t come out soon, kick his ass and make him come out. Tell him he’s gay! Convince him of it! You Munchausen’s infested idiots!


6 posted on 06/24/2014 6:47:16 PM PDT by FlingWingFlyer (Feed the wacko enrviromentalists to the starving polar bears.)
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To: mgist

Check is browser history. that’ll tell you all you need to know.


7 posted on 06/24/2014 6:48:43 PM PDT by IllumiNaughtyByNature ($1.84 - The price of a gallon of gas on Jan. 20th, 2009.)
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To: mgist

I always wondered, what if my son is a Democrat? Where would he live after I disowned him? How would I explain it to my friends?


8 posted on 06/24/2014 6:50:16 PM PDT by GrandJediMasterYoda (Hitlery: Incarnation of evil.)
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To: FlingWingFlyer

That seems to be the way it is done these days


9 posted on 06/24/2014 6:51:18 PM PDT by GeronL (Vote for Conservatives not for Republicans)
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To: mgist
The real question is how do I raise a child that will be straight and not gay?

I have a theory that most gays are introduced to it at an early age. Often by a friend or relative. The natural emotional/physical response that is intended to reinforce a marriage gets pointed instead at same sex attraction.

So here's my thoughts:


10 posted on 06/24/2014 6:53:16 PM PDT by DannyTN
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To: GrandJediMasterYoda

Same, mine thinks he is a Libertarian. I beat him about the head and face when he gets home from his 50 hour a week summer job!!!
Pahleeze!


11 posted on 06/24/2014 6:53:46 PM PDT by acapesket
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To: mgist

A tween doesn’t know what he (or she) is. It isn’t anything a child this age shouldn’t even be thinking about.
This ‘advice’ columnist should be shot.


12 posted on 06/24/2014 6:54:15 PM PDT by Wiser now (Socialism does not eliminate poverty, it guarantees it.)
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To: mgist

Sure ask him. Who cares nowadays?


13 posted on 06/24/2014 7:01:29 PM PDT by A Navy Vet (An Oath is Forever)
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To: mgist

Sure ask him. Who cares nowadays?


14 posted on 06/24/2014 7:02:13 PM PDT by A Navy Vet (An Oath is Forever)
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To: Wiser now

I knew unconditionally at about age five that girls
were magnificent. Hands downs, no debate. Fifty
years later and nothing has changed.


15 posted on 06/24/2014 7:04:58 PM PDT by huckfillary
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To: mgist

I just threw up.


16 posted on 06/24/2014 7:05:07 PM PDT by certrtwngnut
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To: mgist

They shouldn’t ask their son if he is gay. They should demand he be gay, so they can show their neighbors know how tolerant they are. I hear a lot of people saying they hope their child is gay now.


17 posted on 06/24/2014 7:07:22 PM PDT by nickcarraway
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To: mgist
show your son that you are welcoming of all good people

I guess that leaves out conservatives, tea party groups,those who believe in the 2nd amendment, many religious people, etc. The "good people" would be democrats, liberals, gays, anti-religious, etc. /s

18 posted on 06/24/2014 7:11:22 PM PDT by teacherwoes (Alethephobia-fear of hearing the truth)
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To: mgist
Dear Mr. and Mrs. Liberal: Feel free to give this poster to your son. you're gay photo: youre gay eestrada.jpg Professor tumblindice, Phd.
19 posted on 06/24/2014 7:13:31 PM PDT by tumblindice (America's founding fathers: all armed conservatives)
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To: DannyTN

I agree. Famed singer Ricky Martin had the producer that was murdered by his sons.

Because of the trauma they have sufferred, they deserve compassion. I was blessed not to have been assualted by a homosexual as a child. I treat everyone with love.

There but for the grace of God go I.


20 posted on 06/24/2014 7:15:45 PM PDT by mgist (.)
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To: mgist

Basically the answer was: “Turn Him Gay! That’s the best thing you can do!”


21 posted on 06/24/2014 7:17:09 PM PDT by ExTxMarine (PRAYER: It's the only HOPE for real CHANGE in America!)
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To: GrandJediMasterYoda

LOL If it were up to me, you will have “won” the thread.

Geez- how clueless can people be? If the boy (that’s boy, meaning born with male type furniture) is not gay, or “leaning” gay, or “effeminate”- whatever the hell mom & dad want to think he might be, can you imagine how devastated this kid would be to have his own parents accuse him of that?

Talk about scarring your kid for life...
(I hate leftists)


22 posted on 06/24/2014 7:17:33 PM PDT by KGeorge (Till we're together again, Gypsy girl. May 28, 1998- June 3, 2013)
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To: mgist; Gilbo_3; Impy; NFHale; GOPsterinMA; BillyBoy; fieldmarshaldj; Perdogg
RE:"Should we wait for our son to come out — or ask him ourselves if he’s gay?"

I am so proud if you son.
We aways wanted a gay child. Boy, the neighbors sure will be jealous of us, their kids are straight,
Do you want me to pick up some condoms for you when I go to the grocery store? You can never be to careful (blushing)”

23 posted on 06/24/2014 7:18:00 PM PDT by sickoflibs (King Obama : 'The debate is over. The time for talk is over. Just follow my commands you serfs""')
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To: mgist

Just announce it on Facebook for him...


24 posted on 06/24/2014 7:18:23 PM PDT by Kozak ("It may be dangerous to be America's enemy, but to be America's friend is fatal" Henry Kissinger)
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To: mgist

So, the best thing you could do for your son will take place before the talk, and that’s to be matter-of-fact about being gay. Watch “Modern Family” together and talk positively about the characters


Grooming your child to be Gay a pedophile’s dream.


25 posted on 06/24/2014 7:25:10 PM PDT by RginTN
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To: mgist

Give the kid a lingerie catalog like Victorias Secret.

Should straighten him right out.


26 posted on 06/24/2014 7:31:00 PM PDT by lacrew (Mr. Soetoro, we regret to inform you that your race card is over the credit limit.)
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To: FlingWingFlyer

That’s exactly what I was thinking. These twisted-sister “parents” are practically falling all over themselves to encourage their kid to be a Trendy Gay.

Stupid Fs.


27 posted on 06/24/2014 7:33:04 PM PDT by samtheman
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To: mgist

“Don’t let the world tell you who you are.”


28 posted on 06/24/2014 7:33:20 PM PDT by HiTech RedNeck (Embrace the Lion of Judah and He will roar for you and teach you to roar too. See my page.)
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To: DannyTN

There is an entire emotional/spiritual complex that gets twisted. Distancing from God is at the heart of it.


29 posted on 06/24/2014 7:34:13 PM PDT by HiTech RedNeck (Embrace the Lion of Judah and He will roar for you and teach you to roar too. See my page.)
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To: mgist
Famed singer Ricky Martin had the producer that was murdered by his sons.

Huh? 'Splain?

30 posted on 06/24/2014 7:38:04 PM PDT by Albion Wilde ("The commenters are plenty but the thinkers are few." -- Walid Shoebat)
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To: mgist

I knew a guy who had some effeminate ways but was married and had a couple of kids. He came to me once after church and wanted to talk - he told me that as a young man his Uncle and another person had said he was gay because of his speech - it had concerned him all his life. SO much so that he had gone to a “Coming Out” group to see if it was true. Anyway he got around to deciding that he wasn’t. What His Uncle had done to him was to sew a seed of doubt that had bothered him all his teen and adult life - there is life and death in our words - especially to unformed egos in teens. I would have liked to have smacked his Uncle and the other man about the head for a few hours for the pain and anguish they caused this guy!


31 posted on 06/24/2014 7:40:33 PM PDT by melsec (Once a Jolly Swagman camped by a Billabong.)
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To: mgist

Check out this one from the other night:

I Know My 9-Year-Old Son’s ‘Type’: Pretty Boys With Dark Hair
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/news/3168168/posts


32 posted on 06/24/2014 7:46:21 PM PDT by beaversmom
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To: Kozak
Just announce it on Facebook for him...

Lol...exactly.

33 posted on 06/24/2014 7:54:42 PM PDT by beaversmom
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To: Wiser now

“This ‘advice’ columnist should be shot.”

It’s the same old WaPo garbage.


34 posted on 06/24/2014 7:55:59 PM PDT by kitkat (STORM HEAVEN WITH PRAYERS FOR OUR COUNTRY)
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To: Deathtomarxists

Or he likes eating cucumbers...


35 posted on 06/24/2014 7:56:10 PM PDT by BurningOak (Live Free or Die)
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To: mgist

Ten to twelve year old boys are often still in the “girls are icky, but I like how they look” phase. So you get a push and pull and rebound “I like them, I hate them, should I kiss her or push her to prove I’m a boy?”
A tween doesn’t have a sufficiently developed mind to appreciate the import of the “gay” label, except that he does like and maybe even love his close friends as brothers. And he isn’t sufficiently developed sexually to know whether he likes girls. And he isn’t sufficiently experienced with girls if the hormones have kicked in to be anything but awkward.

In short, an 18 year old who says “girls a lower sexual appeal than a truck” probably knows what turns him on and what doesn’t.
A 12 year old can’t. But parents labeling him and then pushing him in that direction will create a self-fulfilling prophecy from which he won’t escape.


36 posted on 06/24/2014 8:23:14 PM PDT by tbw2
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To: DannyTN
 I have a theory that most gays are introduced to it at an early age.

I was chatting with a high school friend on Facebook the other night. I know that he is homosexual now, but it was always suspected by people during our teen years.

His mom died last year and he posted last year how wonderful she was. She sounded like the perfect mom. My friend was adopted.

Well he posted something lovely again about his mom on what would have been her birthday recently.

I told him how touched I was about his love for his mom. He then confided in me that even though he loved his mom she did something horrible to him. She had walked in on a family member abusing him and did nothing to stop it then or later. He said he was literally abused by this person hundreds of times between the ages of 9 to 13. When the person went on to abuse his younger sister then the mom intervened. He said he felt so much shame. So unloved.

I felt awful for him. I don't know if my friend would have turned out homosexual had this never happened, but he told me it was at the heart of his promiscuity and not being able to be attached. He has also had a tremendous problem with addiction that he has been forced by the state to address (got caught selling).

He did get married at one time and had two children. I know he still loves that woman as he has spoken fondly of her on his FB page, but they have been split for a long time. I'm not sure how long he has been with the man he lives with now.

37 posted on 06/24/2014 8:29:27 PM PDT by beaversmom
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To: sickoflibs; mgist; Gilbo_3; Impy; NFHale; GOPsterinMA; fieldmarshaldj; Perdogg

Dear Civilities: My husband and I have a 12 year old daughter who spends a lot of time alone at funeral homes visiting the wakes of people she doesn’t know. So we can easily imagine, one day, finding out she is a necrophiliac. Or perhaps not; we don’t know her orientation yet, and either way is fine. We love her unconditionally and whether she is attracted to dead people is not an issue. My question is about how to handle that conversation if and when she chooses to start it. Or should we ask her? I don’t want to say the wrong thing, omit the right thing or suggest that something so important to her is not an issue for us. As a parent, what should we say and not say during this conversation? — Gina P.

A: Although you don’t know your daughter’s sexual orientation yet, I applaud your question about how to handle “the coming-out talk,” the goal of which is to make sure that she feels your love and support. Frankly, I wish every parent of every child thought along these same lines. Because the real question is: How do I raise a child who will know she’s loved, whether she sleeps with dead or live people, and who accepts all others (except people who disagree with her lifestyle) regardless of their sexual identity?

So, the best thing you could do for your daughter will take place before the talk, and that’s to be matter-of-fact about being a necrophile. Watch the 1988 film “Dead Mate” together and talk positively about the characters. When you hear about incidents of necrophilia in the news, celebrate the happy necrophile and his or her deceased lover. In fact, the supper table can help convey your attitudes and perspectives on world news in general, which will reinforce your values to your daughter. Follow my parents’ “open-table policy” and show your daughter that you are welcoming of all people, except those nasty right-wing bigots who don’t share your sexual beliefs.


38 posted on 06/24/2014 8:30:21 PM PDT by BillyBoy (Looking at the weather lately, I could really use some 'global warming' right now!)
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To: DannyTN

Any honest mental health professional will tell you that the overwhelming majority of male homosexuals were molested as children by an older male or introduced to homosexual behavior by peers.


39 posted on 06/24/2014 8:57:55 PM PDT by Eagles6 (Valley Forge Redux. If not now, when? If not here, where?)
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To: mgist

My husband and I have a tween son whom we can easily imagine, one day, telling us that he is gay. Or perhaps not; we don’t know his orientation yet, and either way is fine

Do you people live on top of a friggin fence???
Grow a set yourselves and pick one thing............


40 posted on 06/24/2014 9:17:17 PM PDT by 48th SPS (Not Republican. Not a Democrat. I am an American)
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To: mgist

Even more striking in tone is a recent article where a man, who is convinced his 9 year old son is gay, proclaims that he knows what type of males his son finds attractive.

“I know my 9 year old son’s type”

http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/3168168/posts?q=1&;page=92#92


41 posted on 06/24/2014 10:54:28 PM PDT by BlackVeil ('The past is never dead. It's not even past.' William Faulkner)
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To: BlackVeil

that guy needs to be on a watch list.


42 posted on 06/24/2014 10:57:24 PM PDT by GeronL (Vote for Conservatives not for Republicans)
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To: huckfillary

My 5 yr. old grandson is different. At a school function my daughter noticed him getting upset at a classmate. When they got home she asked him why. He told her “Justin kept telling me I have a girlfriend, but I HATE girlfriends.” LOL.


43 posted on 06/24/2014 10:57:34 PM PDT by kelly4c (http://www.freerepublic.com/perl/post?id=2900389%2C41#help)
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To: mgist

Er it’s almost as if some parents WANT their child to be gay, and ya know why...it’s because being gay is not only accepted by libtards I really think it is ENDEARING to them!


44 posted on 06/24/2014 10:59:40 PM PDT by kelly4c (http://www.freerepublic.com/perl/post?id=2900389%2C41#help)
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To: GeronL

I agree. The article has a very disturbing tone. And I think I know who it is who finds pretty young boys with dark hair to be so attractive ...


45 posted on 06/24/2014 11:00:24 PM PDT by BlackVeil ('The past is never dead. It's not even past.' William Faulkner)
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To: BlackVeil

exactly


46 posted on 06/24/2014 11:01:31 PM PDT by GeronL (Vote for Conservatives not for Republicans)
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To: lacrew

“Give the kid a lingerie catalog like Victorias Secret.”

I had to make do with the Sears catalog... Kid’s today don’t know how good they have it.


47 posted on 06/25/2014 3:32:28 AM PDT by outofsalt
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To: sickoflibs

Pretty damned disgusting..


48 posted on 06/25/2014 4:41:18 AM PDT by NFHale (The Second Amendment - By Any Means Necessary.)
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To: outofsalt

Same here...just tried to put a modern slant to it.


49 posted on 06/25/2014 4:56:10 AM PDT by lacrew (Mr. Soetoro, we regret to inform you that your race card is over the credit limit.)
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To: BillyBoy; sickoflibs; Gilbo_3; Impy; NFHale; fieldmarshaldj; Perdogg

I...uh...WTF!!!


50 posted on 06/25/2014 5:54:34 AM PDT by GOPsterinMA
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