Yeah, I can understand that.
If anyone was ever to say to me that I love animals more than people, I would have to say that in many or even most cases, that is true.
It’s just a result of my experiences with people versus experiences with animals.
That’s not to say that I don’t love certain people very much, but I am a complete sucker for animals, most especially dogs.
And some animals out there have been through tremendous suffering, and some have suffered by the hand of humans, and that really makes me sad.
I am not familiar with Halla though. I have not heard her name or her story before. I am interested to know who she is.
Condensed version because I really cannot bear talking about her much, yet:
She was a rescue at 6 weeks.
The jerk who had Odin’s daddy called me and said he had a pup in dire straits.
I went to get her and not even 3 miles from his house, we diverted immediately to the vet ER in Winchester.
They gave her virtually no chance of survival, not knowing what was wrong but we gave her a chance.
The bill rapidly escalated.
Many FReepers, to whom I am eternally indebted, offered financial aid and many prayers, which we needed desperately as Obeyme pretty much crashed our home business, which ~had~ always allowed us to easily shoulder vet bills.
A miracle occurred and she lived.
Seven months later, she had an “episode”.
Next thing I knew, we were at vet neuro clinic in Leesburg VA and she got an MRI.
Over 70% of her brain was water.
When I saw the images, the world dropped out from under me and I unashamedly wailed in the vet’s office.
It was SO wrong and so unfair that a dog so loved should be so doomed.
Again, the same [and more] FReepers helped us bear the cost.
Tragically, 22 days after her initial episode, she started to seize and was put down.
To this day, I hate myself for not giving her more chances.
The decision to end her was not mine.
Holding her still for that was singularly the worst 3 minutes of my life, to date.
I relive it often, both awake and more horribly, asleep.
I’ll never forgive myself.
But there are people here that I owe an eternal debt because without their help, we would not have those precious 7 months with her.
She was an extremely special, bright little soul.
Part of me died with her and I can’t seem to get it back or “get over it”.
I’m guessing it might have something to do with having had miscarriages and her being just a baby.
Some deep psychological scars, there.
And, so, I’m out of here for the night as the crying has started again.
And now that Godforsaken dying-dog-Subaru ad is playing.
:’(