Ruling on area man's quest to stop child support sets a new tone

TimesLeader.com ^ | April 1, 2003

[ChemistCat]

How about not doing the deed unprotected with someone who has functioning ovaries and uterus, until you KNOW HER well enough to *know* that you can trust her not to put horns on you?

These guys who live like a CBS sitcom--hopping in and out and in and out of bed with just anyone--and then whine about child support make me sick. If you COULD be the father and you don't challenge the matter before the baby has a chance to bond with you, tough!!! Be a man and support the kid. If you made a baby with someone who turns out to be a witch, that's just one of the mistakes you make in life that can be VERY EXPENSIVE.

[OneVike]

Maybe it's just the mother in me talking.

That is the very thinking that screwed me. To many people think like mothers, we need to start thinking like people. Not every case is the same, what ever happened to taking each case on it's own merrits. We have allowed the libs to treat avery situation when it comes to children the same. Not all situations are the same.

[OneVike]

How about not doing the deed unprotected with someone who has functioning ovaries and uterus, until you KNOW HER well enough to *know* that you can trust her not to put horns on you?

HOW DARE YOU ACCUSE ME OF SOMETHING THAT IS NOT TRUE! WE WERE MARRIED YOU FU*^*# MAGGOT!

[honeygrl]

"To many people think like mothers, we need to start thinking like people."

I must respectfully disagree :) I think if everyone thought like a mother, the world would be a better place.

[William Terrell]

. . .but it's a no win situation.

Maybe sometimes everybody involved in a drama has a hard lesson to learn from it.

[Freakazoid]

This guy Doran is a dishonorable a$$hole. He lived with this boy as his own for four years. He was married to the mother at the time. He is the dad. Children come first and that's that. So what if he wasn't the sperm donor. He's the kid's dad.

This sets a lousy precedent.

P.S. The mom's a turd. I pity little master Doran.

[Orangedog]

Damnit, kids! Don't make me pull this car over!

;)

[longtermmemmory]

can't the wronged man sue the biological father for repayment?

How about we just have a mandatory paternity test from the begining?

[misterrob]

Sorry Honeygirl but MEN ARE NOT MEAL TICKETS!!!! Point the finger at the sisterhood for their shameless deceit and lack of substance. It is sad that children have to suffer because of this type of behavior but what about innocent men's rights? Should I have to obligate myself financially for the rest of my life for someone else's misdeeds?

the CHOICE should be mine if I want to have a relationship and while I would certainly continue on I see NO reason why I should have to pay child support. Let the real kid's father take on that obligation.

[honeygrl]

"Let's have this woman introduce the kid to the real father, who can now start paying the child support. She can also explain to the kid that she hid his real father from him and lied to him all these years because she cared only about herself, and she treated both the child and the former husband as fools to be lied to for her convenience.
"

While I do agree the mother was wrong to do what she did, having her spill her guts to the child would only punish the child and help ease her guilty conscience(sp?).

[OneVike]

Sorry but is politicians that think like mothers that put us in the spot this country is in. Solomon did not think like a mother, he thought like a logical God fearing man! I would rather be like Solomon in my wisdom then like a mother.

[cherry]

"If I found out my son was actually someone elses it wouldn't change a thing in the relationship or in my level of support. I've never understood these stories."

me either...

I hate to tell you guys, but this ruling will cause more men to lose parental rights and visitation ....

you can't have it both ways....you can't claim that the father is just as important as the mother when you get rulings that because it was not your sperm, your fathering of that child MEANS ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO THE COURTS.....

be careful what you ask for....

BUT if you think that your fatherhood means no more than your sperm or your money...then this ruling is great for you.... how very very sad

[OneVike]

Now , That's funny.

No hard feelings towards my fellow freepers, this is just a very touchy subject with me.

[avenir]

"I think a real man would've continued to be the father every child needs. Maybe it's just the mother in me talking."

Yeah, you have to wonder if he ever really bonded with his son. I go to visit my sister and I fall head over heels in love with my nephew and niece every time (they live about 1000 miles away). I cannot imagine truly bonding with your own child and loving them and then going "Whoops! Sorry, you're not really mine. I'm not your Dad after all. See ya."

But I can imagine being really, really angry after finding out your wife deceived you at that level. Maybe he'll come back to his senses after he gets past the anger stage.

[longtermmemmory]

WRONG, too many female wacko's have alowed this notion of "any father figure will do" dominate fatherhood.

I would never go out with a woman who had a child because I had no desire to raise someone else's child.

In this case, you can not understand the destruction of a sacrifice based on a lie. Fatherhood based on the lie destroys everything with the relationship. The biological father has standing to claim, the mother can block visitation, the mother can alternativly coerce financial support.

We need MORE men who are vocal and active in order to STOP the DECEPTION. Fatherhood must never be based on a lie.

[Orangedog]

I think if everyone thought like a mother, the world would be a better place.

But if acted like a mother, there wouldn't be anyone left to pay child support? ;)

[livis_dad]

Whoa... get the coffee brewing over this debate, it's gonna take awhile.

I agree the father who raised the boy, but isn't the biological father shouldn't be legally obligated to pay.

So who pays support for the poor kid?

The biological father, if he can be found? At this moment I say yes, for lack of a better solution.

What a mess.

[honeygrl]

"Should I have to obligate myself financially for the rest of my life for someone else's misdeeds? "

Well, if in your mind the child was yours for 4 years, how could you so easily just toss him aside just because his mother is a horrible woman?

[Nick Danger]

While I do agree the mother was wrong to do what she did, having her spill her guts to the child would only punish the child and help ease her guilty conscience

I doubt that she has a guilty conscience. The more pressing reason to advocate this is to alert the child to the fact that his mother is a schemer who will lie to him and use him as a tool to protect herself. He should be aware of that; he should be warned. It's not like he won't figure it out himself some day.

[discipler]

"This "presumption of paternity" is meant to protect the child by preserving the family structure."

What a bunch of hooey. These people don't give a crap about 'preserving the family structure.' These modern women want the government out of their uterus, but they darn sure want the government in man's pockets.

I'm all for government enforcing a man's legitimate obligations, but there needs to be equity. Our system today is unfair to men. I know this is anecdotal but I know a man who pays half of his paycheck to support his two daughters who were carried off to another state to live with mother and live-in boyfriend. That home has two paychecks plus the father's half: NO EQUITY.

I say that broad point the finger to the man who planted a child in her and make him pay. I'm sick of this double standard.