The Dirty Little Secret Of Carnal Carnies (Carnies get a lot of action from local chicks.)

NCbuy.com ^ | today | staff

[Rodney King]

FORT LAUDERDALE, Fla. (Wireless Flash) -- If you're looking for love in all the wrong places, you might want to work in a carnival.That's the sordid truth from Brett Witter, author of a new book, "Carnival Undercover" (Plume). He claims an amazing percentage of women have the hots for carnival workers and make their lives a circus.

The carnies affectionately call these wanton women "lot lizards" who Witter says are primarily interested in having anonymous sex with a stranger -- especially one who'll be leaving town soon. But not all carnies get the chance to get carnal with the townfolks.

Witter says there's a strict carny caste system that favors the guys who run the ball-tossing games and shooting galleries operators more than the shmoes who run the food booths or take tickets for the Ferris wheel.

[Rodney King]

I'm always in the wrong industry.

[Snowy]

Ew

[MatthewViti]

How's that Ford Expedition doin Rodney?

[John Beresford Tipton]

Gypsies, Tramps and Thieves



I was born on the wagon of a traveling show
My momma use to dance for the money they'd throw
Papa would do whatever he could
Preach a little gospel, sell a couple bottles of Doctor Good

Gypsies, tramps & thieves
We'd hear it from the people of the town
They'd call us
Gypsies, tramps & thieves
But every night all the men would come around
And lay their money down

Picked up a boy just south of Mobile
Gave him a ride, filled him with a hot meal
I was sixteen, he was twenty-one
Rode with us to Memphis
And papa woulda shot him if he knew what he'd done

Gypsies, tramps & thieves
We'd hear it from the people of the town
They'd call us
Gypsies, tramps & thieves
But every night all the men would come around
And lay their money down

I never had schoolin' but he taught me well
With his smooth southern style
Three months later I'm a gal in trouble
And I haven't seen him for a while, uh huh
I haven't seen him for a while, uh huh

She was born in the wagon of a travellin' show
Her mama had to dance for the money they'd throw
Grandpa'd do whatever he could
Preach a little gospel, sell a couple bottles of Doctor Good

Gypsies, tramps & thieves
We'd hear it from the people of the town
They'd call us
Gypsies, tramps & thieves
But every night all the men would come around
And lay their money down

Gypsies, tramps & thieves
We'd hear it from the people of the town
They'd call us
Gypsies, tramps & thieves
But every night all the men would come around
And lay their money down

[Dog Gone]

I'll bet they get best-looking women in town.

[Iowa Granny]

Oh Please! I know it's not fair to speak in generalities, but even at my most despirite times, I think I would be out of the mood by the time I scrubbed those carnies down with a hot high powered washer, loaded with Pinesol.

The writer of this story definitely lives in Fantasy Land or perhaps, Never-Never Land.

[Larry Lucido]

Hey, Honey, can I join the circus? Why? Oh, no reason.

[willowpar]

Witter says there's a strict carny caste system that favors the guys who run the ball-tossing games and shooting galleries operators more than the shmoes who run the food booths or take tickets for the Ferris wheel.

It's nice to see that these girls still have standards - the shmoes who run the food booths or take tickets for the Ferris wheel really are the bottom of the bucket. :-)

[Cathryn Crawford]

LMAO!!!

Yes, I have an irresistable urge to sleep with some nasty guy who works at the "pop the balloon" stand! I have been exposed! I admit it!

[L,TOWM]

Riiiiiiiigggghhhhhhttt...

[tracer]

Perhaps, but it's tough when your whole life is a roller coaster.....

[Destructor]

"I'll bet they get best-looking women in town."

I seriously doubt it. Have you ever seen any carnies? I'll bet they mostly get trailer-trash whores, and prostitutes.

[Rodney King]

I think Dog Gone was being sarcastic.

[shotgun]

It worked for my main man, Joe Dirt!!

[HHFi]

There's nothing the chicks dig more than the combination of missing teeth, giant tattoos and a hook for a hand.

[martin_fierro]

[steveo]

Dang!

[RussianConservative]

But not all carnies get the chance to get carnal with the townfolks

Yup, bet the bearded lady and lizard guy don't get much.

[shotgun]

It was shame what Buffalo Bob did to him!!