Why Do We Suckers Tip?

Gunny G's Globe and Anchor Sites & Forums! ^ | 27 September 2003 | Dick Gaines

[gunnyg]

Tip means To Insure Promptness, or Tips, To Insure Promt Service... Numerous writings regarding the history of "tipping" would indicate that tipping came about centuries ago, and was paid up front to insure prompt service subsequent to you providing a gratuity. Now, the gratuity is paid after the fact; just another aspect of how backasswards things have become.

Gone are the olden days when the innkeeper's daughter was the servant administering to weary travelers at wayside inns. But today, tipping has grown into an institution unto itself, and we are "conditioned" to this with obedience, and without question, no resistence, not so much as a whimper.

In fact, we Tip with extreme loyalty and pride, as we do paying our "taxes"! Anyone who dares voice an opinion contrary to tipping, is immediately attacked by tippers--the majority--therefore, mob rule prevails. Recently, I chanced to post some of my thoughts on the above to a Internet bulletin board, and was lambasted unmercifully as a tightwad, flake, and just plain mean-spirited (where have I heard that b4?).

Some of these irate responses came from enraged waiters, waitresses, etc. (excuse me, "SERVERS") who felt that they were entitled to tips, since their employers paid them below minimum wage and they needed the tips. I'm not sure that is even so and/or legal.

Others stated that they certainly would not take another job at higher pay and have to pay taxes on that pay, ending up w/less in their pockets; whereas otherwise they did not report their total tips, etc. Hmmm...

This topic is not limited to servers, etc. Today, everybody under the sun seems to be an eligible tippee and expects a tip--and big ones too.

If you are inclined to respond/post on this board, please attempt to do so with the big picture in mind, and not personally biased, e,g., as you would if you just happen to be one of the countless tipped/insufficiently tipped servers, taxi-drivers, bellhops, etc., etc. You may respond/post on any or all of those things mentioned above, and/or related information, questions, answers, etc.

Actually, I may have been motivated on this topic after reading an article on the Internet (by a U.S. Marine, moonlighting) who was badmouthing consumers in general for thinking that they should pay only the traditional 15% tip--this arrogant xxxxxxx was sure he had more coming him, and, indeed, was irritated/enraged that some were daring enough, depriving him of his due.

Personally, I am damned sick and tired of "servers" kneeling at my table, referring to me/us as "you guys," and hearing their "sorry bout dat," (which means xxxx you!) And what really pisses me off is when I'm sitting on the end in a booth, and some jerko waiter stands on my outboard foot w/his size 12 gunboats! No, I'm wrong--what really pisses me off is sitting there waiting for my check so I can get the hell outta there, after being pestered to death from the time I was seated with service above and beyond, only for them to disappear when it is my desired time of departure--this is when they show up after you finally catch their attention and wave them down, and they still pressure you to order desert after you ask for your check! Then, if you want change, there's another wait till they come back again.

Don't get me wrong--I am not opposed to tipping because of the above listed grievances--I am opposed to tipping in principle--I work for my pay like most others--and I don't expect/demand a handout. I just thought I would pitch my favorite bitches here while I'm at it, since the opportunity presents itself.

[gunnyg]

Have at it!

[Xenalyte]

Well, Mr. Gaines, except for the fact that the "to insure promptness" business has absolutely no basis in etymological fact, therefore rendering your premise moot, it was a great article.

[Xenalyte]

It is indeed true that waitstaff are paid below the federal minimum wage. The federal government is totally aware. The IRS assumes that waiters combine their tips with their hourly $2.01 (which it was when I was a waitron) to receive the minimum wage each hour. Furthermore, the IRS assumes that your tips and your hourly rate ALWAYS match or exceed the minimum wage.

[dennisw]

If you are a cheap, ego-centric bas*ard (libertarian??) you should only dine at places where tipping is not traditional. Certain caferterias, buffets and the like.

Go to McDonald's, Wendy's, Checkers drive through. If you don't tip there you won't get angry scowels.

[Young Rhino]

I tip good service 20-30%. I tip nothing for lousy service. It is my suggestion that the incompetent/disgruntled waiter/waitress find other employment.

Before I'm flamed regarding the latter, I worked my way through undergrad as a waiter. I know when to pin the blame on the waiter or waitress for lousy service as opposed to the kitchen.

[gunnyg]

Dear Dennisw:
The only part of your predictable response I do not understand is your use of the word "if."

[Rubber Duck]

There is no tipping in Japan and most of Asia except in the most unsual circumstances (i.e., your kid ralphs in the back of a taxicab).

I worked on the Ginza for five years, then the most expensive real estate in the world. During our 45 minute lunch, I could walk to any number of places and have a decent sit-down served meal for 1,000 yen ($7.50) or less. One restaurant watron lived in the same neighborhood as did I.

Compare the cost of a similar meal in Manhattan where the watron expects a tip exceeding 15% and either comutes in from Jersey or lives in broom closet tenement locally. Something, indeed, is very screwed up about our society.

[R. Scott]

As an ex-cabdriver, I tip. If I can’t afford the cost plus tip, I order something cheaper. I also believe in tipping after service is rendered. I can then tip appropriately. I don’t base my tip on a percentage of the bill – that would be meaningless. I tip based on what the service was worth to me. If in a restaurant or bar and I receive great service I tip an amount equal to what I would charge to carry the food or drinks to a stranger. If the service was mediocre, it would be less. If the service was bad or the person was impolite I generally leave two pennies – the traditional way to say that “your service was worth two cents, and no more”. That way the message is clear, and the tip is not construed to indicate that I’m just cheap.

[leadpenny]

Each of my three sons has gone the busboy/server/bartender route in their growing-up years, and they would agree, wholeheartedly, with your approach.

[aruanan]

Why do we tip? So we can go to the same place twice and be assured that nothing bad is going to happen to our food before it gets to us. Well, so we can be a little more assured that nothing bad will happen to our food before it gets to us as a result of not having previously tipped.

[leadpenny]

In my book that is called extortion. Why would you return to a place where that potential exists?

[Amelia]

Some of these irate responses came from enraged waiters, waitresses, etc. (excuse me, "SERVERS") who felt that they were entitled to tips, since their employers paid them below minimum wage and they needed the tips. I'm not sure that is even so and/or legal.

This is certainly true. On a really slow day (very bad weather, etc.) it's possible for a server to make less than minimum wage, although this doesn't normally happen for good waiters and waitresses at busy restaurants.

After hearing stories from several family members who worked themselves through college by waiting tables, I'm a bit more sympathetic to those who seem to be trying, and a good bit more generous to those who do a great job.

[aruanan]

Well, Mr. Gaines, except for the fact that the "to insure promptness" business has absolutely no basis in etymological fact,

Or in actual fact, which is, in this case, probably more important.

[SBprone]

Mr. Pink has returned!

[netmilsmom]

I also did this work in college. I tip 20% for those that are pleasant, refill coffee and talk to my kids (we do family places). 10% if we got the food but no plates cleared. For those that are totally unpleasant, I dig a nickel out of my purse. This was the waitstaff will know that it was intentionally left as a reflection of the service.

[TrappedInLiberalHell]

A bit off-topic, but a quandary: Domino's Pizza (and some others) now charge a $1.00 delivery fee for pizza. Since they are now charging extra for delivery, is tipping still de rigeur? I always tipped well in the past, three or four bucks for a $15-$18 order. Should I not tip, tip the same as before, or tip the same as before minus one dollar?

Maybe this sounds trivial, but there doesn't seem to be an etiquette for this that I know of. The reason I tip pizza delivery drivers is because they are risking their lives every time they go out on a call, whether to bad drivers, going into bad neighborhoods, or getting a bomb strapped to their neck. Plus, if I ever get the same delivery guy in the future, I won't worry about my food being spit on. I guess tipping has become a form of bribery in that respect.

I do tip commensurate with service in restaurants, however. And if the service is bad, I won't go back there anyway, so no worries about food tampering.

[Young Rhino]

Like the nickel idea...I'll borrow it.

[mtbopfuyn]

Anyone who dares voice an opinion contrary to tipping, is immediately attacked by tippers--the majority--therefore, mob rule prevails.

Hear, hear! I'm pissed and have taken back my right NOT to tip sorry, no good, crappy service. It never fails the waitstaff has some chip on their shoulder. When you're being taken to your seat they run and leave you far behind rather than lead you as a polite hostess should. They can't seem to count and never have the correct amount of menus or place settings. They rattle off the menu at lightening speed so you have no idea what they disinterestedly mumbled and heaven forbid if you ask for a repeat. Of course you meal takes forever and your still left waiting for a place setting. In the past, waitstaff could remember what dish went to which patron, but now it's always mass confusion. Mr. M always tells them he drinks LOTS of water and it would be easier for them to leave a pitcher, but Noooo that's just not possible and it's impossible to get their attention later. We usually have to call another table's waiter over to help but he/she isn't the one who pockets the tip. And forget about the check, we usually give up and pay at the front desk. Service today is so bad I consider it a chore to go out anymore. I always feel it's a waste of time. I'd rather have a root cannal than to go to all the trouble of getting ready only to be disappointed with the outing. As to the "but I don't get paid enough" and "it's expected" reasoning for tipping, well it's hogwash. A tip is for service above and beyond the call of duty, not a requirement. Hear that? Above and beyond. It's not my job to suppliment their salaries. They agreed to accept the job at X salary and that's that. Do other workers get tips? No, the rest of us may get a raise or bonus IF and only IF they perform above expectations.

[CroftonFreeper]

These people are working hard making a living, paying there way. Cheap bastards that complain about tipping "piss me off" Stay at home or go to the fast food joints. Could you imagine having to serve an SOB like you ? Thats worth atleast 15%.

[Cronos]

Japanese don't tip -- it's not in their culture.

[Cronos]

And that's one of the good points of Japanese culture which we ought to emulate! The waiter should be paid by his/her employer the amount he/she deserves. Tipping is too french.

[visualops]

The IRS assumes that your tips are a percentage of the establishment's earnings. If you do not report at least this amount (8% I believe), then the difference will be tacked on to your W-2 as allocated tips. The IRS also expects you to report the value of "non-cash tips" from customers, such as tickets, passes etc. The other item to remember is the taxes to be paid on reported tips are not simply federal income taxes, but social security, medicare, and state income tax as well.

[NittanyLion]

I tip because servers are willing to do something I would no longer choose to do myself. Often they're young kids trying to put themselves through college or supplement their incomes; I did similar jobs as a kid. I realize that I'm in a fortunate enough position now to give them a generous tip, since people did the same for me.

[gunnyg]

Thankya, mtbopfuyn:
With your response I am now at my hoped for number of sensible responses here.
Success is sweet!

[mtbopfuyn]

Your = you're

Gosh, I used to never make those mistakes but the more I'm on the web poor grammar is rubbing off.

[Yeti]

below minimum wage and they needed the tips. I'm not sure that is even so and/or legal.

Well, do some research, DICK gaines.

[Huck]

I tip 20% or more when dining. I tip delivery guys at the house too. Mainly because I have been (by my standards anyway) financially successful the last few years, and I want to spread the love around a little. It's fun to be nice to someone.

[ghostrider]

Everything about our society is phony. We don't even declare war anymore. Why should anyone expect the posted price to be honest. Tip, tip, tip, tip, tip....

Or, ignore the brainwashing, carry your own bag, open your own door, and live like the classical American, rather than a tight pants French wimp.

[varon]

........what really pisses me off is sitting there waiting for my check so I can get the hell outta there, after being pestered to death from the time I was seated with service above and beyond, only for them to disappear when it is my desired time of departure--this is when they show up after you finally catch their attention and wave them down, and they still pressure you to order desert after you ask for your check! Then, if you want change, there's another wait till they come back again.

Have you considered upgrading from bars with food to higher class resataurants? ;-)

[JoeGar]

I tip according to the quality of service I receive. Bad service, bad tip. I thought this was the way it is supposed to work.

[Rodney King]

Tipping is good. I was in Zurich for 10 weeks this summer. There isn't really tipping there. The result is that it's virtually impossible to get a refill on your beer and wine. It takes forever to eat a meal. One day I watched the waitress sit down at the bar with her friends for half an hour before she checked on her tables.

[Ronin]

Move to Japan. Tipping is not done here. If you leave money next to your plate when you leave a restaurant you will probably be chased by a waitress who wants to return the change you "forgot".

The prices are higher, but I prefer it this way.

[Graybeard58]

"which it was when I was a waitron"

.. Couldn't find that "word" in three different on line dictionaries, even spelling it as another poster did, watron. I suppose if it is not a word, you can spell it any way you want to.

[ItisaReligionofPeace]

I'm not sure that is even so and/or legal.

It is so. Waitstaff make $2.13 and hour. It is legal. If you don't tip a hard working waiter, you are pretty damn sorry.

[aruanan]

In my book that is called extortion. Why would you return to a place where that potential exists?

That potential exists in almost any place; even in those where no tip is involved some employees garnish foods with various bodily fluids gratis. To seek to reduce one's chances of such an encounter is not so much yielding to extortion as it is exercising prudence.

[Chancellor Palpatine]

This guy is an ass.

[ghostrider]

Have you considered upgrading from bars with food to higher class resataurants? ;-)

"Higher class" is key to the tip issue. Most certainly, if you are looking for special service beyond the basic, then you should expect to pay for it. But, if you expect only clean, uncontaminated service provided in a reasonable time, then the establishment should pay for it. Dennys, Olive Garden, and the Golden Corral are establishments that should pay their own employees.

[ItisaReligionofPeace]

I can explain it for you. Tipping in Europe is not common either, and if you do tip, it is merely rounding up the change. Waiters in those countries make a decent wage from the restaurant, not to mention that most people received health benefits etc from the government.

[Graybeard58]

"It's fun to be nice to someone".


...You got it Huck, it's much better to be nice to someone than to sit around looking for reasons not to.

[Newbomb Turk]

This is why I don't eat out anymore.
1. The food usually is low quality.( my wife is an excellant cook so I admit I am spoiled.)
2. The service sucks
3. They think I should tip just because they showed up at my table.

[ItisaReligionofPeace]

Sounds like you and Mr. M. go to some pretty crappy restaurants to eat.

[ItisaReligionofPeace]

"Could you imagine having to serve an SOB like you ? Thats worth at least 15%."

LOL. So true. For this reason alone, I usually tip 20%.

[ItisaReligionofPeace]

First of all moron, if employers paid their waitstaff, the cost of your meal would simply increase by 15% - 20%. Secondly, "tipping is too french" shows your complete ignorance. Tipping in France is not the norm, other than giving the coins received after paying your bill.

[ItisaReligionofPeace]

Very good point.

[wimpycat]

In Chile, and in many other countries, the waiter actually buys the food you ordered from the restaurant, then sells it to you. Sort of like beauticians who rent their 'stations' from the owner of the establishment, or cab drivers whose cars are marked with a cab company's logo and phone number, but are actually owned by the cab driver.

So the waiter is, in effect, an independent distributor. It's in his own personal interest for the restaurant to cook good food and to give you good service. If someone refuses to pay for a meal, the waiter loses out, not the restaurant.

[ItisaReligionofPeace]

They are much more laid back as far as service goes.

[ghostrider]

....where no tip is involved some employees garnish foods with various bodily fluids gratis. To seek to reduce one's chances of such an encounter is not so much yielding to extortion as it is exercising prudence.

My how the brainwashers have succeeded. If you pay extra our of fear, then you have been extorted. The brainwashing and political programming is blatantly obvious on this thread. Waitron, waitperson, pay so they don't spit or piss on your food...Argh!

[Helen]

We also tip well for a pizza delivery. They get the same dollar amount from us now - pizza minus delivery fee plus tip - and if they want to label a dollar of our tip as a delivery fee, that's up to them.

[Petronski]

"Waitron" seems to me to be a term made up by exasperated wait staffers frustrated by the way customers and/or management expect robotic service, and how mindlessly robotic that work can seem.

But then, I don't know.

[TommyDale]

Many restaurants pay their employees HALF minimum wage, and expect them to make any income from tips. Until this nonsense is corrected, I feel morally obligated to supplement their income with tips. Since most waiters/waitresses are students, it is even more reason to help them.