Posted on 04/05/2009 12:05:50 PM PDT by Bokababe
My father died alone, surrounded by all of us who loved him. His beloved breath was labored for the last, long, eight hours of his life while we hung on every whisper of air that kept him alive. In the living room, my mother, brother, sister and I talked quietly about the past and a future without him. I'd known him all of my life. He was as familiar to me as my own face in the mirror each morning. His impending death was incomprehensible, even to a Christian soul. Funny, we intellectually expect the arrival of death someday, but emotionally we're never prepared. I didn't know how it would feel to lose anyone I loved. My dad was the first.
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That's so sweet Ms. and funny!
You are right, we do need to be appreciative of the fact that they LIVED, not just that they died. I can never think of my father, without seeing a smile on his face. He was a happy man, in spite of a very difficult life.
It may sound strange, but I have never once doubted that those I've lost are waiting for me, to bring me home. I've been through other crises of Faith -- more in my ability to deal with things, than the Love of God for me and all of us-- but that idea that they will be waiting for us when it's our time to go, is as real to me as gravity.
He was, and he had a great sense of humor!
I am glad that you got reaquainted with your Dad before he passed on.
65 was far too young!
Mine was 78 when he crossed over.
He had a rare blood disorder, and dementia that hit him hard and fast.
He is free from all that, now.
“It may sound strange, but I have never once doubted that those I’ve lost are waiting for me, to bring me home. I’ve been through other crises of Faith — more in my ability to deal with things, than the Love of God for me and all of us— but that idea that they will be waiting for us when it’s our time to go, is as real to me as gravity.”
In that belief, we are two peas in a pod!
;0)
An old fiance, who she recalled on her deathbed many years later. Weird how all that stuff can stay with you to the end.
I am sorry for everyone’s loss of loved one. I think the hardest thing is for a parent to lose their child. My dad lost my mom , then my brother. I was thankful he wasn’t here to see my sister die. I try to find comfort in the fact that they are all together now.
Nope, G_D.
The point to the story, is that we all die alone.
It will test your faith.
But that is OK - G_D meant for us to be tested, now and agian.
We are born alone, and we die alone.
“For Christians, it’s a sad time, too, to be separated for a while, but it’s offset by the knowledge of the coming reunion soon...”
My dad, a minister for 50+ years, passed away last September. After the closing prayer at the funeral, the whole family sang the chorus of “When We All Get To Heaven”. The rest of the congregation was a little surprised, but it seemed fitting.
It will test your faith.
But that is OK - G_D meant for us to be tested, now and agian.
Very depressing story, for me.
My husband’s aunt was dying this fall her son lives here and was there for her but he had to go out of town for a few days and her daughter came and stayed for over a month. In the meantime their brother’s wife of 40 yrs was also dying and the daughter wanted to see her SIL before she died, so the day after Thanksgiving she started her journey to see her SIL, she was about half way when they called her and said her SIL had died so she decided to spend the night where she was and return to her mother the next morning and her mother died at 12:01 AM that night.
My kids were 7 and 9 when my FIL died, when my older son realized that he was dying he asked us if he could stay with him and take care of him. My FIL could still get around then and after a little talk and some trepidation we allowed it to happen. Grandpa Bill did a lot more caring for my son than the other way around but they were together. After that he went into the hospital for about 6 wks and my sons couldn’t see him anymore and I think that hurt them more than suffering and hurting with him.
He died in April and we are farmers and my husband had a lot of work to do, I mean, if you don’t get the land prepped and planted in time your whole year is shot but he wanted to be with his father. I just told him that love and family were worth more than money any day and he should be with his father and we would deal with what came.
I even took the kids out of school for a few weeks at the end because the hospital was 4 hrs away. When we returned home all our land prep work had been done and it was ready to plant. My husband nor I ever asked for any help but our friends came and did it all.
At the funeral my kids asked me if they could look at him in the casket and I left it up to them, when they approached they both cried like crazy but I still think it was best for them.
I think it’s hardest for a parent to lose a child, too.
My brother lost his only son to cancer..
Still, I try to remember that we have our family for a time, and that we will all be reunited one day.
It’s also a good lesson that I should tell the people that I love, that I do love them, while they are here.
(and while I am, too!)
Very true! So sorry for your loss. Pandy
I am so sorry for your loss. My son was totally amazing with his grandpa. I couldn’t be more proud of him for staying right there. Later he told me if he had to stay for days he would have. My dad was very much afraid of death & my son knew it. Hospice was such a help to my family. Sounds like you have some great friends.
Yes - now you have to have faith.
Of all the things I have read in my life, that short story set me back more than any other.
I would not show it to children - it is a story for adults.
Even Jesus, at the moment of His death, asked God why He had forsaken Him.
I am thinking that he got over it.
BTW, the second creepiest thing I ever read, was “Insomnia”, by King. {{Shudder}}. Couldn’t sleep for a week.
Interesting little story that lady wrote, eh?
What loving folks you have around you. Treasure them.
Very depressing story, for me.
Granny's story was very depressing to me, too.
As far as "God testing us", none of us know what it is going to be like when we go. It's an impossible story to write in the first person. Maybe God didn't much like granny -- she wasn't one of my favorite people either.
And yes, Patton, it did clearly say that she was jilted by a guy named George, before she married her husband.
Our priest's wife works as a nurse in the cancer ward of a local hospital. She's said that there is a clear difference in the attitudes of those terminally ill patients with Faith and those without it. She said that those with Faith are almost always at peace with their fate and are often more worried about the feelings of those around them than they are for themselves when they are dying. Those without Faith are almost invariably angry, acting as though they've gotten gypped out of something, even when they are very old. She said that often the greatest test of Faith is on the living when the person dying is very young, or with young with small children. She knew a doctor who gave up oncology after treating a young women in her early thirties with four young children, who was terminal. He said he just couldn't do it anymore, lose patient after patient like that (which cancer doctors do) -- especially after seeing that young woman die. Losing her was just the straw that broke the camels back for him.
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