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Acts Body Wash - Smell Like the Early Church!
TBNN - TomintheBox News Network ^ | March 9, 2012 | Thomas Slawson

Posted on 08/17/2012 4:19:57 PM PDT by Alex Murphy

Do you want to be as close as possible to the church in Acts? Have you washed your hands of the institutional church for the pure and authentic New Testament experience? Now you can wash your body of it too with all new Acts Body Wash. After just one shower, your home church will not only look just like the church of the New Testament, but will smell like it too!

Acts Body Wash is specially formulated to replicate the smells of the first-century Near East. Based on the most accurate historic research, our scientists have painstakingly produced what is believed to be the the exact smells of New Testament times. These smells include:

So try new Acts Body Wash today and you're church will not only look New Testament, but will smell like it too!


TOPICS: Humor; Mainline Protestant
KEYWORDS:
Do you want to be as close as possible to the church in Acts? Have you washed your hands of the institutional church for the pure and authentic New Testament experience? Now you can wash your body of it too with all new Acts Body Wash. After just one shower, you're home church will not only look just like the church of the New Testament, but will smell like it too!

FWIW, TBNN is one of my favorote stops on the Internet. Check them out!

1 posted on 08/17/2012 4:20:03 PM PDT by Alex Murphy
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To: Alex Murphy

if this is supposed to humourous it misses the mark...it is neother parody or satire. it is just....dumb


2 posted on 08/17/2012 4:28:08 PM PDT by Nifster
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To: Alex Murphy

Ehh. Just gave it a try. Didn’t find anything on the site that was funny in the first 5 minutes. That was enough time wasted on it. This Acts Body Wash schtick is definitely not funny, leaning towards insulting. Death is the smell of the New Testament church??


3 posted on 08/17/2012 4:49:14 PM PDT by Bryanw92 (Sic semper tyrannis)
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To: Alex Murphy

No thanks.


4 posted on 08/17/2012 4:50:45 PM PDT by skeeter
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To: Bryanw92

We just had a sermon about when the Pharisees got all riled up when Jesus and his disciples didn’t do the ritual washing before eating. While the point of the story was the Pharisees were all about the show - the Jews (and early Christians) were well aware of the bad things that happen when things are not clean, dead, etc.


5 posted on 08/17/2012 4:55:30 PM PDT by 21twelve (So I [God] gave them over to their stubborn hearts to follow their own devices. Psalm 81:12)
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To: Alex Murphy

Has your account been banned yet? It should be.

This is not only nonsense, it’s offensive nonsense.


6 posted on 08/17/2012 5:02:51 PM PDT by Bullish (Liars aren't always thieves but thieves are ALWAYS liars)
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To: 21twelve

Most of Leviticus is about the rules for cleanliness in a bronze age culture. It is a big part of the huge success of the Jewish people in the early days. They had strict rules for food and sanitation that their neighbors did not share.


7 posted on 08/17/2012 5:03:40 PM PDT by Bryanw92 (Sic semper tyrannis)
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To: Alex Murphy

Welcome back the the land of the posters, Alex. Your missing of the mark has been sorely missed.


8 posted on 08/17/2012 6:27:06 PM PDT by MarkBsnr (I would not believe in the Gospel, if the authority of the Catholic Church did not move me to do so.)
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To: Alex Murphy

Actually, I think you might be confusing the odor of the last gay parade with that of early Christians worshiping God.


9 posted on 08/17/2012 6:40:53 PM PDT by SaraJohnson
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To: Alex Murphy
Looks like you might be having one of those days, when nobody seems to appreciate the singularity of your [satirical] worldview...

hang in there buddy. Like the guy said; "A new cart, a new start!" :-)

10 posted on 08/17/2012 7:28:27 PM PDT by BlueDragon (going to change my name to "Nobody" then run for elective office)
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To: Alex Murphy

Smells more like present day pick your muslim country.


11 posted on 08/17/2012 9:09:58 PM PDT by Doomonyou (Let them eat Lead.)
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To: Bullish
Has your account been banned yet? It should be. This is not only nonsense, it’s offensive nonsense.

Maniacal Laughter!

12 posted on 08/18/2012 8:15:18 AM PDT by Alex Murphy (http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/news/2898271/posts?page=119#119)
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To: Alex Murphy

Well, that was a complete waste.


13 posted on 08/18/2012 10:52:21 AM PDT by Psalm 144 (Voodoo Republicans. Don't read their lips. Watch their hands.)
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To: Alex Murphy

LOL!!!

Some have no sense of humor. ;O)


14 posted on 08/18/2012 3:08:38 PM PDT by HarleyD
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To: Alex Murphy

Stupid, wrong, and offensive.

The early church did not smell of death, dung, and rotting flesh.

To the contrary, the Jews were the neat freaks of the ancient world.


15 posted on 08/26/2012 5:16:36 AM PDT by dangus
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To: Alex Murphy

Stupid, wrong, and offensive.

The early church did not smell of death, dung, and rotting flesh.

To the contrary, the Jews were the neat freaks of the ancient world.


16 posted on 08/26/2012 5:16:47 AM PDT by dangus
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