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To: svcw
I have been down the road of having a kids marriage break up and seen the problems {many more than this}. I had to deal with a wayward ex son in law who was threatening death to others plus my daughter's own gross misconduct. To complicate it more a new boy friend highly abusive entered the picture also.

Some words of advice from experience. Don't trust CPS period. In most states including my own it is ran by bleeding heart liberals scared of their own shadow. If an aggressive lawyers says Boo to them they fold like a cheap seat. The one abandoned by them is usually the person trying to do right by the kids.

She needs a lawyer and this advice is coming from a person who has a strong dislike for them. One lawyer got me on the stand as a witness in an abuse and negligence case and I about went to jail for Contempt. DCS in my state let the grandkids down even despite confessions of bad conduct from the accused.

In cases where there is shown hostility or a non custodial parent is deemed to be a threat a judge has several options. One is no visits or contact which isn't likely. The second one is supervised contacts and visits only. The third is visits supervised by a professional third party.

BTW I have also had the experience of dealing with my wife's violent EX after we were married. His interest in the kids went away fast. He learned the more her tried to stir things the harder we came down on him legally. Before that he was a free man not paying nothing.

How old are the kids? In some states at about age 11 or 12 the kids can for themselves decline contact. We had our grandkids for almost two years and lost custody because I verbally let fly on our daughter which is what parents should do when their kids do wrongs like that even if they are in their 30's.

Document everything and turn it over to your/her lawyer to present to the judge. Without a Lawyer basically you don't get a voice as his lawyers will get all the judges attention. You have my prayers and my sympathies. Yea my ex-son in law was as a son to us before he changed. Her second boy friend/husband was one sick puppy and the cause of her kids being taken and us gaining custody.

51 posted on 09/07/2012 7:04:13 PM PDT by cva66snipe (Two Choices left for U.S. One Nation Under GOD or One Nation Under Judgment? Which one say ye?)
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To: cva66snipe

I am keeping my own log.
The new fellow in my daughter’s life is just a doll.
About CPS I was shocked that they did nothing more than take a report and interview everyone. They came up with a “plan”, my daughter abided by the plan and the former sonIL did nothing except he said he wouldn’t hit them, yet they have done nothing further.
She does have a lawyer, whom she gave permission to reveal everything to me. So when she sees the lawyer they put me on speaker phone.
I like the woman. She has stated that she will do what is necessary to protect her and the kids.
My daughter and I have talked about having the youngest living with us for a time because he is not in school.
Unfortunately, they live in another state.
We watch the airfares, and when they are decent, I fly out there. The former sonIL backs off when I am there.
The kids are 9, 7 and 4.
Thank you for the advice.


57 posted on 09/07/2012 7:13:34 PM PDT by svcw (If one living cell on another planet is life, why isn't it life in the womb?)
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