Skip to comments.
Whitby councillor claims to have fathered alien child
The Northern Echo ^
| 17th June 2013
| Stuart Minting
Posted on 07/09/2013 8:15:32 PM PDT by Alex Murphy
click here to read article
Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first 1-20, 21-25 next last
A LABOUR politician has defended his beliefs in extra-terrestrial life - after claiming to have fathered a child with an alien. Married father-of-three Simon Parkes, who represents Stakesby on Whitby Town Council, said his wife had rowed [fought] with him after revealing he had a child called Zarka with an alien he refers to as the Cat Queen. The 53-year-old driving instructor said he has sexual relations with the alien about four times a year. What will happen is that we will hold hands and I will say Im ready and then the technology I dont understand will take us up to a craft orbiting the earth," he explained.... ....Councillor Parkes, who also claims his "real mother" is a 9ft green alien with eight fingers, said people only claim he is mad because they have not shared his experiences and that the encounters don't affect his work on behalf of Whitby residents....I think I am fairly clear in my head that I am being monitored [by aliens] very closely and if there is anything thats seriously about to happen or does happen then I am fairly confident in my own mind that they will intervene, they have in the past.
Bailey: Now Mrs Woodroffe, can you tell me briefly why you would like to be interviewed on our show?
Mrs Woodroffe: Yes, I feel I have a certain responsibility to other Earthlings.
Venus: (to Bailey) Think I'll split.
Bailey: (to Venus) Okay.
Mrs Woodroffe: You see, my hatchback supreme broke down on a deserted stretch of highway. Now, that's when I saw the incredibly bright light and felt myself compelled to walk toward it.
Venus: (to Bailey) Think I'll stay.
Mrs Woodroffe: Before I knew it, I was surrounded by a group of strange people in gold lamé suits.
Venus: That would either be the Temptations or the Four Tops.
Bailey: Go on, Mrs Woodroffe.
Mrs Woodroffe: Well, anyhow, to make a long, internationally-copyrighted story short, I was beamed aboard their spaceship - what they call a Getgone - and transported to Hachacha #3. That's what you people call Mars.
Venus: Did this place have heavy metal screens on the windows?
Mrs Woodroffe: Yes!
Venus: Lucky guess!
-- From WKRP in Cincinatti, episode "Bailey's Show"
To: Alex Murphy; mikrofon; martin_fierro
he has sexual relations with the alien about four times a year.
To: Alex Murphy
"Once you've had worm, you'll forever yearn!"
"Dia shábháil ar fad anseo!"
Genuflectimus non ad principem sed ad Principem Pacis!
Listen, O isles, unto me; and hearken, ye people, from far; The LORD hath called me from the womb; from the bowels of my mother hath he made mention of my name. (Isaiah 49:1 KJV)
3
posted on
07/09/2013 8:21:43 PM PDT
by
ConorMacNessa
(HM/2 USN, 3/5 Marines RVN 1969 - St. Michael the Archangel defend us in Battle!)
To: Alex Murphy
LOL! Well what did you expect? He’s Labour! :-)
4
posted on
07/09/2013 8:26:17 PM PDT
by
floralamiss
("For the sake of His sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world.")
To: Alex Murphy
That Cat Queen is such a slut.
5
posted on
07/09/2013 8:26:21 PM PDT
by
Kirkwood
(Zombie Hunter)
To: Alex Murphy
I am reminded of Randy Quaid in Independence Day...
“I told you people....”
As long as they take me with them when they go home, I;ll be happy.
To: Alex Murphy
The 53-year-old driving instructor said he has sexual relations with the alien about four times a year. All I'm taking away from this is that he's having more sex than I am.
7
posted on
07/09/2013 8:33:00 PM PDT
by
Kip Russell
(Be wary of strong drink. It can make you shoot at tax collectors -- and miss. ---Robert A. Heinlein)
Comment #8 Removed by Moderator
To: Kirkwood
Yes, she is but she has such beautiful hair and her eyes glow in the dark.
9
posted on
07/09/2013 8:39:57 PM PDT
by
B4Ranch
(AGENDA: Grinding America Down ----- http://vimeo.com/63749370)
To: Alex Murphy
10
posted on
07/09/2013 8:45:36 PM PDT
by
Bobalu
(It is not obama we are fighting, it is the media.)
To: Alex Murphy
Councillor Parkes, who also claims his "real mother" is a 9ft green alien Oh, mama....
11
posted on
07/09/2013 8:53:52 PM PDT
by
Kip Russell
(Be wary of strong drink. It can make you shoot at tax collectors -- and miss. ---Robert A. Heinlein)
To: Kip Russell
I was wondering if the Cat Queen has any friends....or sisters.
12
posted on
07/09/2013 9:04:35 PM PDT
by
VerySadAmerican
(If you vote for evil because you can't see evil, you ARE evil!)
To: Kip Russell
Old Star Trek.
I loved it.
To: Alex Murphy
This article reads like a Monty Python skit, therefore pictures and a link are neccessary.
Spot the Looney
To: Alex Murphy
I wonder if he’s spoken up during Question Time.
Apparently being crazy is not a negative for a Labour politician.
15
posted on
07/09/2013 9:36:39 PM PDT
by
RginTN
To: Kip Russell
Ah, the lovely Yvonne Craig.
16
posted on
07/09/2013 10:05:20 PM PDT
by
stormer
To: Alex Murphy
I was beamed aboard their spaceship - what they call a Getgone - and transported to Hachacha #3. That's what you people call Mars. HAS to be fake! Mars is called Barsoom. ;o)
17
posted on
07/09/2013 10:34:25 PM PDT
by
boatbums
(God is ready to assume full responsibility for the life wholly yielded to Him.)
To: Alex Murphy
Growing up in the Southwest, UFO believers were kind of like conspiracy nuts are today.
18
posted on
07/09/2013 10:50:05 PM PDT
by
JimSEA
To: Alex Murphy
oh boy I feel bad for this man’s wife & children, not to mention his constituents. Mental illness is very bad.
19
posted on
07/10/2013 12:43:20 AM PDT
by
jocon307
To: boatbums
HAS to be fake! Mars is called Barsoom. ;o) And the women there are red, not green.
And the sight which met my eyes was that of a slender, girlish figure, similar in every detail to the earthly women of my past life... Her face was oval and beautiful in the extreme, her every feature was finely chiseled and exquisite, her eyes large and lustrous and her head surmounted by a mass of coal black, waving hair, caught loosely into a strange yet becoming coiffure. Her skin was of a light reddish copper color, against which the crimson glow of her cheeks and the ruby of her beautifully molded lips shone with a strangely enhancing effect.
She was as destitute of clothes as the green Martians who accompanied her; indeed, save for her highly wrought ornaments she was entirely naked, nor could any apparel have enhanced the beauty of her perfect and symmetrical figure
20
posted on
07/10/2013 1:02:48 AM PDT
by
Kip Russell
(Be wary of strong drink. It can make you shoot at tax collectors -- and miss. ---Robert A. Heinlein)
Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first 1-20, 21-25 next last
Disclaimer:
Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual
posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its
management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the
exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson