What Japanese Women Want: A Western Husband

The Christian Science Monitor ^ | December 6, 2004 | Bennett Richardson

[Campion]

I go with the 'we can still be friends'.

The last girl who said "can't we just be friends" to me has been Mrs. Campion for going on 17 years now. She took "no!" for an answer. :-)

[Dan from Michigan]

You know just how to handle FR gals, don't ya?

Well if you say so, who am I to say otherwise. :)

[mbennett203]

Good point. But the effect is the same, so I'm just trying to help both sides save time. :D

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You have a magic way with words..lol

[Dan from Michigan]

Who on Gods green earth does Moore think he's fooling by shaving and putting on a suit?

Maybe he wants to go back to his DAVISON (Not Flint) roots....

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I hear ya. My hubby was a blind date. He told me that the second he saw me he knew we would be married. Two weeks later, we were.

It'll be 33 years come January.

[marajade]

Do guys even want or need a female friend? That one question alone is still a mystery to me.

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Sure. and I wanna be a dim again....not. (sarcasm in that line)

[Darlin']

"American men have far more options in marrying a foreign spouse than American women do. There is higher foreign demand for American men than women. Why?"

You couldn't BE more wrong.

[RosieCotton]

Heh...my Dad used a slightly different approach when he proposed. He told Mom "Either you say you'll marry me or I never want to see you again - we can't be just friends."

Apparently it worked. She said yes, and they had been married just shy of 33 years when she passed away.

[TalBlack]

Nope, :). Next question.


C'mon, now, I could swear that that's the attitude described by a lot of the women on this particular thread and in modern life in general.

What am I missing?

She say's: 'I have standards for how you must treat me and conduct yourself that are inviolate'. She says: 'My world doesn't revolve around you.'

None of which is unreasonable, BUT, I don't see how what Cogadh na Sith differs from the standard for the modern woman.

[TalonDJ]

I have had some in the past... not recently. Yeah I want a female friend. Just one. For a good long time.

Women seem surprised when a guy tells her he thinks of her 'that way'. What is toe be surprised about? I evaluate every eligible female I mean on a scale of potentiality. I don't know anyway to NOT do that.

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I'm sorry about your moms death. I don't have any male friends and my husband doesn't have any female friends. It works for us that way.

[marajade]

That's kinda what I thought. Maybe its just one of the differences between the sexes.

[mbennett203]

I have a few, and to be honest, I'd rather have guy friends. No sexual tension. You can truly be friends.

However, if I were to date someone, I'd probably have to view them as my best friend as well. Wierd paradox.

[mbennett203]

"What is toe be surprised about? I evaluate every eligible female I mean on a scale of potentiality."

Bingo.

[TalonDJ]

Being more than casual friends with someone requires effort of some level. The more you have in common with someone the less real effort it takes. People put out effort to be friends for a reason. With family usually the common blood is enough that very little effort is required. With old friends common history makes the effort also very small. For males the only reason to expend that effort to be friends with a female is the potential. If the woman takes that away then there is no reason to expend that effort anymore.

Does all that sound kinda coldly analytical? It is but it is still true.

[Campion]

Sometimes, I think the "let's be friends" line is like a last test. The lady is waiting to see if the man wants her badly enough to kick it aside and sweep her off her feet despite her silly hesitations.

[TalonDJ]

Which is all the more reason why guys are hurt by the 'just friends' or the 'but I don't think of you that way'. To a guy that means: 'I considered you and immediately dismissed the possibility when we first met and I have never looked back'. I honestly don't know how it can mean anything different.

[tortoise]

What!No French poodle???

Would you really trust the French poodle with the Chinese cook...? ;-)