[Atlantic Bridge]

Being a academic educated man and living in good ole Europe I am quite familiar with women who refuse to multiply. The proportion of childless academic women is around 40% here in Germany. During the time I attended univercity nearly all my girlfriends (I had a few) told me that they only want to become pregnant if it will be compatible with their career. Since being pregnant and having kids is never compatible with careers, quite a lot of them never will have a own family.

Another effect of this standpoint is, that others of them are desperately trying to get pregnant when their time to be fertile is simply over after they reconsidered the whole thing. Not all couples are able to get kids when they hit the 40ties.

Last but not least many men simply do not want to have children anymore when they are 40, 50 or even 60. Since it is typical that many woman are much younger than their husbands it can be a real problem for men to start a (new) family in their mid 50ties. I wouldn't do that either. Besides there is a broad movement among European men to renounce traditional families because the divorce rate is at nearly 50%. It is not funny to be a cash cow. The changed moral conditions made it easy in western Europe to live with girlfriends without being married. Nobody cares about the sexual behavoiur of others as long as no one has to deal with material loss or damage.

I am among those who did it quite traditional. I am married to the nicest and prettiest girl you can think of and our three wild little boys are the proof that it was worth doing it.

The funny thing is, that we have many childless female friends with academic grades in their late 30ties, who are absolutely crazy about my kids. Sometimes the boys are really fed up with their "aunts" trying to kiss them all over. Although of course they like the expensive gifts, they hate being a substitute for some frustated friends of ours. We even had to cool down some relationships a bit. Do not get me wrong - not all women are that way, but some are for sure.

I think it is a fact that human nature can not be tricked. If a woman decides to live without her own kids (this can be very reasonable in some cases) she usually has to pay a bitter price.

[beaversmom]

I am married to the nicest and prettiest girl you can think of and our three wild little boys are the proof that it was worth doing it.

That's terrific! Thank you for your perspective from across the Atlantic.

[Draco]

Your post is an interesting personal account. I understand Ms. Merkel is asking Germans to have more children. Another article on this site spoke of the coming demographic implosion in England and what steps the government might take to change things. I am not convinced government can. There is a spiritual aspect to childbearing/rearing that I think Europe has lost in some ways. One of the women quoted in the article seems to deride Americans who go to church. Sheesh. This lady, and others like her, are trying hard to convince themselves of something that, deep within, the are not comfortable with.

[wtc911]

"I am married to the nicest and prettiest girl you can think of..."

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No, I am.

[IndyPatriot]

I believe everyone has a right to decide for or against children. I find it interesting that many of the advocates I read about are younger woman, whose careers are peaking and who are active climbing the corporate ladder. I'd be interested in hearing the perspective of older woman on the issue.

Recently, my mother was hospitalized for breast cancer. Her best friend was visiting her in the hospital at the same time I was there. She was childless, and like my mother in her early 70's.

As we sat there, she burst out crying and when I inquired as to what the problem was, she wondered who would be there for her in the end. I was filled with pity at her despair.

[Antoninus]

Besides there is a broad movement among European men to renounce traditional families because the divorce rate is at nearly 50%. It is not funny to be a cash cow.

I wonder how that is related to the decline of Christianity in Europe. When a man and woman were married in the Catholic Church, divorce was simply not an option. One was very careful when selecting a mate. For many of us, that's still the case.

Since the decline of Christianity, divorce has come to be a common and easy thing--almost expected. In my opinion, Western society has suffered greatly on many levels from this and will continue to do so.

I think it is a fact that human nature can not be tricked. If a woman decides to live without her own kids (this can be very reasonable in some cases) she usually has to pay a bitter price.

You are 100% correct. I have noticed the same thing with many of my very highly educated relatives. The single women tend to latch themselves on to the kids of the nearest relative as a surrogate family.

[TheClintons-STILLAnti-American]

"I am among those who did it quite traditional. I am married to the nicest and prettiest girl you can think of and our three wild little boys are the proof that it was worth doing it. "

Kudos to you!