Posted on 05/21/2006 11:55:33 AM PDT by Extremely Extreme Extremist
(CBS) CHICAGO It's a trend that some fear may have long-term consequences. More unmarried women over the age of 25 are not waiting for Mr. Right.
As CBS 2's Alita Guillen reports, these ladies are having children on their own.
The fantasy father at their fingertips is a sperm donor with all the right stuff.
Katherine Gehl and April Lashbrook had successful careers and dated, but they didn't have husbands. They heard their biological clocks ticking loudly.
"It was like a time bomb," April said.
"I need to go and have a baby and be a mother, and so I did," Katherine said.
Women used to depend on chemistry in the bedroom to conceive a child. Now, more and more women are turning to the lab and depending more on science than sex.
This twist on the mating game begins at a sperm bank, where donors can earn up to $900 a month.
"These guys are college students. This is a form of income," said California Cryobank Medical Director Dr. Cappy Rothman.
The sperm undergoes testing for diseases, genetic defects and blood type.
"Donor sperm, in many ways, is guaranteed good sperm," said Dr. Lauren Streicher, a gynecologist at Northwestern Memorial Hospital.
When April chose her donor in 2003, she got a long profile including a medical history and even written answers to questions.
"I knew immediately that was who I was going to choose," she said.
Now, many banks offer much more, including childhood photos and the donors' voices on CD.
Once chosen, the sperm remains frozen and stored until needed. Then it can be shipped anywhere.
While women can inseminate themselves at home, both April and Katherine used fertility specialists.
Many of these donors have already proven their fertility.
"It's an excellent way of getting pregnant because you usually have men who have confirmed pregnancy," said Dr. Brian Kaplan, a fertility specialist with Fertility Clinics of Illinois.
"We are creating a real potential disaster here," said Elizabeth Marquardt with New York City's Affiliate Scholar Institute for American Values.
Some critics are concerned that as this practice becomes more popular, and that with an unknown number of children from the same donor, that two of them might unknowingly hook up.
"In the future, we will have to have a DNA test with anyone we want to have sex with just to make sure we're not related to them," Marquardt said.
Many sperm banks say they try to limit pregnancies based on geographic area to reduce that risk. However, in a transient society, it may be hard to do.
Critics also worry how this might change the definition of family.
"As a society, we're saying fathers don't matter," Marquardt said.
Thirteen-year-old Liz Herzog, whose father is donor number 1002 from Virginia's Fairfax Cryobank, says she's happy with her life.
"I can't even say that once in a while I wish I had a father, because I don't," she said.
Through the Donor Sibling Registry Web site, she has discovered at least 10 half-sibling and has met seven, including Callie from Pennsylvania.
Liz's mother, Diana, thinks these newly forged relationships will last a lifetime.
"You can only hope that your child will be well-adjusted and happy enough when they grow up that they won't feel that they're missing too much," Diana Herzog said.
April's daughter, Julia, is now almost three years old.
"When she was born, it was just amazing," April said.
Katherine's daughter, Alexandra, is eight months old.
Both are enjoying every moment motherhood has to offer.
"It is so much greater than I had any idea," Katherine said.
April, Julia's mom, knows of six half-siblings so far.
All of the single moms we spoke with think the possibility of meeting and dating a half-sibling is very remote because they are very open or plan to be open with their children.
It is interesting to note that back when sperm banks first opened in the 1970s, it was all married couples seeking sperm donors. Doctors say those couples were more likely to keep it secret.
So you have "daddy" issues. Daddy didn't fulfill you, so women having babies without daddies is OK by you. That's only logical if one is suffering a severe chemical imbalance.
Funniest thing I've read all year.
"What do you know about love? How long have you been married to the same person? Have you been faithful to the same person for more than twenty years?"
Maybe I'm just stupid but I just don't get this post.
This thread is really starting to seriously bother me.
Don't take it too seriously.
I for one, want to die in bed at 90...shot by a jealous husband.
Not categorically, although I'm sure some of them are. In any case, wilfully having a child out of wedlock smacks of selfishness.
You 3 are the only reasons I have remained on this thread.
I so appreciate all the things you have all said - including the totally off the wall ones!!!!!!!
Oh, don't think for a minute I have agreed with your "custom-built-to-justify-me-hypothetical." I just don't have any patience for you people who can't rationally discuss anything that doesn't bow to your prejudices, so I gave you the short answer.
Your post scares me.
I just like tweaking the absolutists.
I was giving you rational answers but you didn't like the results. Would it be easier if I just simple said, 'you're right?'
Because Republicans, conservatives, and even Christians seem to be outnumbered on FR by Old Testament Retributionists.
It can be fun, can't it? Other times, its just damn scary.
Perhaps you might consider looking at your answer as something other than rhetorical?
Matrimony: optional. If so, you must be able to mud drywall, change oil, cool good BBQ, and change poopy diapers.
Alternate ad: "Wanted: a man who is willing to be a good father and husband, and in the process put up with me and love me. Looks and athleticism are a distant secondary concern"
Face it: after 20 years, looks will probably be on the way out, along with his hairline, while the pot belly emerges. Character will remain
Just a clarification...this is NOT IVF (In Vetro Fertilization is done in the occurence of infertility when sperm and egg are united externally and then the resulting embryos are implanted in the uterus). The women in the article, are being inseminated with donated sperm...no external fertilization. The woman's fertility is tracked (and in many cases enhanced by fertility drugs) and the sperm is introduced to the reproductive tract at the optimum time for fertilization. There are no left over, or unused embryos. Fertilization either takes place, or it doesn't.
Interesting how these "empowered women" stories come up every time the hitlary for office stories seem to pop up.
I think these stories are "editorial" background for the november elections.
consider the other social issues that are comming up for the november election season. Immigration, homosexual marriage, democrats pretending to be "christian", etc.
this is just there to stir the pot.
Good post. I'd like to add that as an addendum to mine.
In what alternative reality?????
Hmmm, try not to look primarily for widowed men, they will always compare you with their long lost wife.
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