Skip to comments.Sorry, but my children bore me to death! (Feminism's highest honor, Grand Narcissism)
Posted on 07/26/2006 7:17:10 AM PDT by carlo3b
Sorry, but my children bore me to death!
by HELEN KIRWAN-TAYLOLR, Daily Mail 08:00am 26th July 2006
It's the start of the summer holidays, when millions of mothers despair at how to entertain their children for the next six weeks. What none of them dare say is that they would rather their children were still at school or, frankly, anywhere else. Helen Kirwan-Taylor, a 42-year-old writer, lives in Notting Hill, West London, with her businessman husband Charles and their sons Constantin, 12, and Ivan, ten. Here, she argues provocatively that modern women must not be enslaved by their children.
The lies started when my eldest son was less than ten months old.
Invitations to attend a child's birthday party or, worse, a singalong session were met with the same refrain: 'I would love to but I just can't spare the time.'
The nanny was dispatched in my place, and almost always returned complaining that my son had been singled out for pitiful stares by the other mothers.
(snip)Kids are supposed to be fulfilling, life-changing, life-enhancing fun: why was my attitude towards them so different?
While all my girlfriends were dropping important careers and occupying their afternoons with cake baking, I was begging the nanny to stay on, at least until she had read my two a bedtime story. What kind of mother hates reading bedtime stories? A bad mother, that's who, and a mother who is bored rigid by her children.
(snip)Am I a lazy, superficial person because I don't enjoy packing up their sports kit, or making their lunch, or sitting through coffee mornings with other mothers discussing how Mr Science (I can't remember most of the teachers' names) said such and such to Little Johnny and should we all complain to the headmaster.
(Excerpt) Read more at dailymail.co.uk ...
Tell me about it........my daughter is 8 and finding clothes for her is getting more and more difficult.
Wow. Your story is truly inspirational. You found something in yourself that was not naturally bequeathed to you by your mother.
Amazing story of "breaking the chain." Good for you.
Count yourself lucky. Wife's friends and family are liberal to flaming feminist and I get to hear this tripe all the time. No idea what she has in common with them.
Some of her friends are pretty good Moms, but the ones that stick out, really stick out. My wife is a stay at home Mom, and I think that they simultaneously envy her, while they're guilty for their own selfishness of not being willing to make the sacrifices needed to stay at home. (Please note - they're ABLE to stay at home, all married, husbands have stable jobs, etc....they're just not WILLING to give up all the extras that losing a 2nd income entails)
The latest is that Mrs. WBill "shouldn't homeschool so that she doesn't lose her identity", whatever that means. And this is from my Mother in Law, who I would think would want the very best for her grandkid.
I'm very lucky in that my wife knows her own mind and is not afraid to tell them to get stuffed.
I am in agreement.
In that case, I sympathize with your wife. I hear the same things from my relatives, too. I have had to especially listen to the "what about socialization" question on homeschooling from them. Most had their kids in daycare at some point while they worked (as "professionals"). But, I must say, all my relatives enjoy being with their kids.
Luckily, my mother is very supportive of staying home. She had to listen to the same comments back in the 60's and 70's when she stayed home with us kids. In fact, she would've been upset if I put her grandkids in daycare.
I have never been bored for one second with my kids. At every age they are a delight. I do pity her children too; if she can't bear the simple little things, she must not be much comfort when they are truly sick or scared. What a sad childhood they must have.
First, I hope she is ready for the day when her husband tells her he has a young girlfriend because his wife bores him to death.
Also, I hope she is ready for the subdued hatred of the children who have to carry this public admission around and continually prove to their friends that they aren't really boring. They will probably decide to show her just how boring they aren't when they get just a bit older. I predict these kids will try to be hell-raisers and will succeed.
I know of a kid whose mother, the wife of a prominent politician, called him "the mistake", the "unplanned" kid, in an interview. I think he was in high school at the time. He loved her dearly for that, I'm sure.
So, if you have messed up with your kids in some way, shut the EFF up! They don't need to hear you essentially berating them publicly. They WILL get even.
What a selfish person she is. My summers are too short with my kids. In a mere 2 weeks my kids go back to school. I have such fun with them, I can't imagine dreading spending time with them. :(
Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb is a reward. Psalm 127:3
[Why did she have children at all?]
1) Forgot to make the abortion appointment
2) Her friends had kids and she needed to prove something
Read "I love you forever" or "The giving Tree." You will become a puddle, the tears will be falling so quickly. :)
Boy am I glad she's not my mom. I'd hate to read about myself in the paper that way. Plus who cares- shut the he** up and DEAL. What a whiner.
She loves when I get her clothes, but it's getting harder and harder to find things that are cute and trendy and not skanky. I mean, come on, hip-huggers for little girls??? They don't even have hips!
Tell me about it........my daughter is 8 and finding clothes for her is getting more and more difficult.
Be fair; not just ANY shoes. Carrie usually rewarded herself with a new pair of Manolo Blahniks. :)
Bless you for what you're doing. What's happened to American women? I hope your generation begins to speak out. I also hope your ex-daughter-in-law doesn't go into pediatrics.
Dewey, Cheatham And Howe?
Boy you would have hated the columns that show was based on -- they've been sweetened up considerably for TV.
No, you are not superficial because you don't enjoy it. You are superficial because you think everything is supposed to be for your enjoyment.
You missed watching Godzilla® movies and wrestling in slow motion with your kids when they're 4 or 5? And teaching them to melt plastic army men with a magnifying glass? And giving lessons on how to approach and treat animals? A lot of fun stuff comes early on. If you wait until they are 10 you miss it.
I stand corrected.
I guess I was talking more of the family dynamics. The mother is of extreme importance in the younger years, the father is of extreme importance in the later years (see inner city for negative example).
But you're right. Wrestling in slow motion is a blast.
What a beautiful baby!
The picture of him smiling in his sleep is precious!
I confess that just last month my husband and I took a trip without the kids and I enjoyed it very much and didn't miss them a bit.
I spend a lot of time with my kids and love them to pieces! Sometimes they irritate me, and sometimes I pretend to be interested when I'm not. But most of the time I really like being with them. They are funny and have interesting ideas. I can't imagine missing one of their games or performances!
It's actually quite sad that this woman cannot enjoy her children.
LOL!! My two boys were born 6 years apart. With the little one, my husband often mentioned strapping a weight to his head to discourage him from walking.
"There are actually a few commercials on the same theme. There was a Famous Footwear radio spot a few years back that went on about how wonderful it would be when the kids go back to school. I hated it when that commercial came on."
I must admit...I DO feel that way when September comes around. There are days when the kids are whining and fighting all day during the summer, and at the end of those days I can sound an awful lot like the author of this article.
But I get over it after I get some sleep and I chalk up my bad attitude towards exhaustion, and I try again the next day.
There is a middle ground....our children can fit into our adult lives, and we adults can fit into their lives.
We love them, encourage them, teach them, and spend time with them...but there are also times when parents have to do things for themselves or else they will go insane.
It doesn't sound like this author has seen there can be a middle ground. She seems to have taken a "us vs. them" approach.
I couldn't agree with you more, to no ones surprise, because I will alway respect men who enjoy being around children, not just our own, but all children..
I talk about my life with my kids often, and I guess the poor folks on my food and family ping list have to endure my endless prattle about my life as a single dad.. But, that is why I can understand your concern about being around other peoples kids.. What a shame, I had 3 or more kids in my home almost every day, especially around meal times..
I hoped it was because it was my cooking, but I know it was more, it was because I was a dad that they were comfortable talking to and joking with, and who loved just being a dad..
My last boy is now going off to college, to make his own footprints, and someday emulate his upbringing, and be a dad to his kids.. His absence will be deafening, but I have the love of my other 4 kids and my fabulous grandchildren who live close by..
So ride your bike my FRiend, and be a great adult hero to the young'ins while you can, it passes sooooo quickly.. Thanks for listening.. :)
Two boys who live around the corner spend a lot of time at my house. These boys (7 and 9) have two little step-brothers (1 1/2 and a few months). Well, I got to hear all about how mom sends the oldest baby off with grandparents for days at a time because she can't handle both little ones.
Meanwhile, her older kids are with me learning how to swim and float (both were afraid of the water last summer), talking a mile per minute about all sorts of things, begging to be fed, and the little one takes every opportunity to grab ahold of me or lean against my leg.
Frankly, it gets irritating. If I wanted 4 children, I'd have birthed 4 children. But then I look at these two little kids and think that someone has to care about them.
Time to read it - thanks for the pings
Nice thread Carlo and great commentary as usual... Now we have two beautiful women to miss... right?
"I always just hated that Staples commercial at the end of the summer that has the parents skating behind a shopping cart buying supplies so that their children can finally return to school. Even though I worked, I loved having her home."
Me too! Probably has something to do with why I'm now a homeschooler. I enjoy having some "down time," but I like my kids! There is something magical about seeing the world open up to them a bit at a time -- she's totally missing that.
The author says that kids are fine if you feed them, dress them, and tell them you love them -- she may tell her kids she loves the, but does she *show* it?
There are very few young kids in our neighborhood.As a matter of fact they are closing schools here in Eureka...
Indeed we do my dear Waspman, I was thinking that very thing earlier today.. I know both are just jabbering together all day long and watching us to see if we drop the flag.. I am so happy to have you close my dear FRiend.. It keeps me in line.. :)
Please build a ping list for the birth announcement and put me on it!
I just had my 16th grandchild!
How lucky we are my friend to have the kids close, and to see them working together.. That is a real treat.. I raised my first 3 daughters doing homework at a back table in my first restaurant.. We were closer than most families back then and I am proud to say we are even closer now.. Keep cookin and kissin, that is a perfect recipe.. :)
I agree Don, we should build a ping list.. Geeeze, that's entertainment!!! CONGRADULATIONS.. YeHaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Good on ya - you never know what a touch of human kindness may do for these little ones
.. and I know that they love you too sweetie... Huggg
"Frankly, it gets irritating. If I wanted 4 children, I'd have birthed 4 children. But then I look at these two little kids and think that someone has to care about them."
Please know you're doing something truely wonderful for these kids. It may just be the influence in their lives that they need to keep them on the "straight and narrow", knowing that somebody cares about them.
They are all moving to Tennessee. We are building schools here
I suspect she has a problem with the father in order for her to despise the children so.
What a blessing.. and still soooo young.. but you must of had your first child at 4 years old.. :))
Hugs to you as well.
Kids know good people almost instinctively.. Bless them, and bless you, they are just starved, for everything that all children need.. :(
I am afraid that he is problerably no better than she is.. Reading the article, there is no mention of dad taking the kids to the park or anywhere else, only a nanny.. God bless her kids to have been brought into the world to build their resume, and complete the Christmas Cards photo..