We had a short engagement and took out the very operational forward listening post. We were told to stand by in place for further orders.
I was scanning the horizon for signs of the enemy as we were some few miles into enemy territory.
I saw 2 A-10 Warthogs circling a few miles out with the IR TOW sight. We had been airlifted over the first minefield by CH-53 helicopters with Cobra and Hornet escorts earlier that night.
I thought for a second that maybe I should attempt to contact air command to verify they knew we were friendlies, but decided to maintain radio silence instead, figuring they were sent to watch over us.
A few minutes later a Maverick missile came in and killed five of my brothers.
I tried to pull on of them from the flames and the skin came off his arm in my hand.
I have troubling sleeping to this day, and cannot get enough sleep to properly function as a productive worker without the aid of some sleeping pills.
They say this is PTSD. I am ashamed that I have to have some help in this manner...I just feel so guilty over not preventing this. I was only 18.
There are a lot of vets that will not speak of their experiences out of the shame of accepting some help from the VA. This gun ban will affect many.
If this bill passes, too many to count won't go in for help. I doubt my brother will continue getting help. Though the fact he already has, has probably doomed him if this bill goes through.
Deepest sympathy for your losses. Remember, we're only human, and you tried your best. Forgive yourself. You have to! Honor your friends by remembering that the day they passed was only ONE DAY in their lives. Don't let it be the sum of all you had with them, or all the good times they had with others. I know it had to be horribly traumatic, but there was more... so much more. Let their memories be good ones.
And remember, the enemy wants you to be haunted by your brothers losses. Don't let them continue to win by blaming yourself for what happened. You were in very difficult circumstances. Breaking radio silence could have very well brought the enemy to you. So, please, forgive yourself. Be at peace with this. And know that they are in heaven, not in pain. You'll see them again one day. But DO NOT give these evil people any more power over you! They are NOTHING!! Get it? Do Not allow them to cause pain in your heart and in your mind, they do not deserve one more piece of space in your life. They took enough that fateful night. Don't let them have anymore!
Read our bio's here at FR. We've known war... we support you and we'll be praying for you. Replace what happened that day, with happier memories of your brothers in arms. And yes, it is PTSD. And with time it will heal. Use your mind and heart to heal it. Time heals things. When bad memories come in, replace it with a good one of that person. They'd want it that way.
Utmost respect for your service. Thank you!
We understand the enemy you're fighting. They've been getting ready since the 1300's and they have no plans to stop until either ALL OF US convert, or they kill ALL OF us. World dominance. A world that is totally Islamic.
I'll leave you with a favorite quote of ours and some or our brothers and sisters in arms:
"War is an ugly thing, but not the ugliest of things. The decayed and degraded state of moral and patriotic feeling which thinks that nothing is worth war is much worse. The person who has nothing for which he is willing to fight, nothing which is more important than his own personal safety, is a miserable creature and has no chance of being free unless made and kept so by the exertions of better men than himself.
~~ John Stuart Mill ~~
John Chapter 15 vs. 13;
Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.
We're out here fighting for you regarding the PTSD & Gun situation. Your fellow brothers and sisters in arms care.
God Bless!
VH&W