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Mark Steyn: Grope and Change
National Review Online ^ | April 21, 2012 | Mark Steyn

Posted on 04/21/2012 10:04:31 PM PDT by neverdem

Unlike the government of the United States, I can’t claim any hands-on experience with Colombian hookers. But I was impressed by the rates charged by Miss Dania Suarez, and even more impressed by the U.S. Secret Service’s response to them.

Cartagena’s most famous “escort” costs $800. For purposes of comparison, you can book Eliot Spitzer’s “escort” for $300. Yet, on the cold grey fiscally conservative morning after the wild socially liberal night before, Dania’s Secret Service agent offered her a mere $28.

Twenty-eight bucks! What a remarkably precise sum. Thirty dollars less a federal handling fee? Why isn’t this guy Obama’s treasury secretary or budget director? Or, at the very least, the head honcho of the General Services Administration, whose previous director has sadly had to step down after the agency’s taxpayer-funded public-servants-gone-wild Bacchanal in Vegas.

All over this dying republic, you couldn’t find a single solitary $28 item that doesn’t wind up costing at least 800 bucks by the time it’s been sluiced through the federal budgeting process. Yet, in one plucky little corner of the Secret Service, supervisor David Chaney, dog-handler Greg Stokes, or one of the other nine agents managed to turn the principles of government procurement on their head. If the same fiscal prudence were applied to the 2011 Obama budget, the $3.598 trillion splurge would have cost just shy of $126 billion. The feds’ half a billion to Solyndra would have been a mere $18 million. The 823-grand GSA conference on government efficiency at the M Resort Spa & Casino would have come in at $28,805.

Chaney-Stokes 2012! Grope . . . and Change! Red lights, not red ink.

Alas, young Miss Suarez, just 24 and with a nine-year-old son and a ravenous pimp to feed, didn’t care for the cut of her Secret Service...

(Excerpt) Read more at nationalreview.com ...


TOPICS: Business/Economy; Crime/Corruption; Editorial; Politics/Elections
KEYWORDS: marksteyn; obama; secretservice
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To: Atlantan; cgbg

Kennedy’s SS guys were a busy lot. I know because for 28 years I lived next door to the “party girl” who organized their fun times when Saint Jack was in Hyannisport.


21 posted on 04/22/2012 4:17:35 PM PDT by metesky (My retirement fund is holding steady @ $.05 a can.)
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To: neverdem

The man is a genius.


22 posted on 04/22/2012 5:08:15 PM PDT by Lurker (The avalanche has begun. The pebbles no longer have a vote.)
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To: neverdem

Love Steyn! bump for tomorrow


23 posted on 04/22/2012 6:55:39 PM PDT by citizen (Obama blames:arab spring,banks,big drug/oil,bush,ceos,christians,coal,earthquake/tsumani,fnc,wall st)
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To: metesky

BTTT


24 posted on 04/22/2012 7:07:55 PM PDT by prairiebreeze (Don't be afraid to see what you see. -- Ronald Reagan)
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To: cgbg
I believe that JFK’s Secret Service agents partied hardy in Fort Worth the night before JFK visited Dallas for the last time.

How could that be? Texas was a dry state in 1963.

Well, except for the Jacksboro Highway...

25 posted on 04/22/2012 7:16:20 PM PDT by okie01
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To: okie01; cgbg
I believe that JFK’s Secret Service agents partied hardy

That's "partied hearty."
26 posted on 04/22/2012 7:19:34 PM PDT by aruanan
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To: neverdem
Amazing to hear government agents channeling Dudley Moore in Arthur: “You’re a hooker? I thought I was doing so well.” It turns out U.S. Secret Service agents are the only men who can walk into a Colombian nightclub and not spot the professionals
27 posted on 04/23/2012 4:35:28 AM PDT by Madame Dufarge
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To: okie01

The “dry state” is one reason why Carlos Marcellos and company (including Jack Ruby, btw) did such a big business in the Metroplex.


28 posted on 04/23/2012 11:30:05 AM PDT by cgbg (No bailouts for New York and California. Let them eat debt.)
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