Posted on 05/25/2015 10:05:12 AM PDT by Kaslin
I have no desire to pile on with more comments about Josh Duggar, who appears to be a very serious and committed Christian who has made no excuses for the sins of his youth and who deeply desires to make a positive impact for the Lord in the years ahead. I simply want to share some redemptive thoughts, supplementing some of the excellent statements made by others, including former governor Mike Huckabee and Southern Baptist leader Russell Moore.
1. Jesus really does change people. While critics of the Duggar family want to indict them (along with other, evangelical Christians, especially those with large families) for Josh’s actions, and while many seem ready to throw Josh under the bus, the fact is that while he did sin grievously, through repentance, faith and counseling, he became a new man. Jesus really does transform sinners.
How many of us did wicked things as teenagers? I was shooting heroin at the age of 15 and broke into some houses and even stole money from my own father before being radically converted at the age of 16. I was profane, filled with pride, anger, and lust, yet the Lord had mercy on me and totally turned my life around.
Some of us continued to live like this into our adult years, only to find mercy and new life then, meaning that the transformation was even more dramatic.
For me, the first lesson from this story is this: Whoever you, whatever you’ve done, there is hope in the Lord. As Mike Huckabee said, “‘inexcusable’ . . . doesn’t mean ‘unforgivable.’”
As Paul wrote to the Corinthians, “Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. And such were some of you. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God” (1 Corinthians 6:9-11).
2. There’s no excuse for sin, so own up to it. In today’s culture, almost no one is guilty of anything. It’s someone else’s fault, someone else’s responsibility, not our own. We’re all victims, and the reason we do bad things is because someone else wronged us. Isn’t that how we think today?
I’ve even heard athletes apologize for some really heinous actions by saying, “I’m not happy with the way things happened,” rather than saying, “What I did was wrong and I have no excuses. Please forgive me. I’m seeking to get to the root of my problems and address them.”
What a vast difference between the two attitudes.
As Proverbs states, “Whoever conceals his transgressions will not prosper, but he who confesses and forsakes them will obtain mercy” (Proverbs 28:13).
According to the accounts we’ve all heard, Josh confessed his sin to his parents as well as to the proper authorities, and as a family, they worked through the issues. Now, half a lifetime later (he’s 27 and is married with four children), when confronted with a police report about his past, he did not minimize his sin nor did he excuse it. He also resigned from the fine Christian organization for whom he worked, not wanting to bring any negative attention to their work.
When I see someone respond like this, I am filled with hope. In fact, over the years, I’ve seen that people who committed uglier sins but took full responsibility and repented did far better than those who committed less serious sins and tried to sweep them under the rug.
3. Even godly families have kids who mess up badly. Nancy and I only had two kids, and we sought to be godly parents and set godly examples. Yet our older daughter went through a real period of rebellion in her teen years.
As parents, we felt miserable, and I would wonder what I was doing wrong.
Of course, we dealt with her rebellion head on and prayed like crazy for her to really encounter the Lord, but while it was happening, it was terribly deflating spiritually. What kind of father am I? How can I be so ineffective?
Today, we all laugh about those years, and our daughter, who is now 37 and is a devoted wife and mother, is so grateful for the way she was raised. (She and Nancy are the best of friends and are in constant contact.)
The fact that the Duggars, who successfully raised 19 children in the Lord (who can imagine that?), had to deal with one of their kids committing serious sexual sin at 14 should actually encourage other parents rather than discourage them. And perhaps, they can teach us today how this tragic incident helped them come together as a family and draw closer to the Lord.
4. Josh can be an ambassador on behalf of the abused, even helping the abusers as well. While it can feel like your life is over when your past, largely private sins become public (how many of us would like for that to happen?), the fact is that Josh’s future can be bright in the Lord.
He can call on others who are sinning to come clean and get help, using his own example redemptively. And he can encourage those who have been abused to realize that they are not guilty and should not feel shame, also encouraging churches to embrace those who come for help rather than making them feel as if there is something wrong with them.
Why should those who have suffered abuse be stigmatized? They should be our priority for healing and restoration.
5. We need to be careful how we judge. There are many fans of the Duggars who are upset with what they feel is a witch hunt against a godly family, representing one more attempt to remove them from reality TV. (Let me say without qualification that there is life after reality TV, and if the Duggars never do another broadcast, their lives can still be overwhelmingly blessed.)
But would we have had this same attitude of mercy and forgiveness if this was the child of a gay couple? Would we have said, “This proves that gay parents are no good!”?
I certainly believe that kids deserve a mom and a dad and that, optimally, they will do best with a mom and dad, but I don’t indict all gay couples because of the failings of one of their kids
So, if you want to show mercy, be consistent. We can all fall into the trap of selective compassion.
6. There are consequences to our actions, but with God, our worst mistakes can become stepping stones to spiritual growth.
Most of us have done things we wish we could take back, and in some cases, the consequences of our bad choices and sinful actions last for decades. Yet with the Lord, no matter how great the stigma of our sin, if we will humble ourselves before Him, He can take those stumbling blocks and turn them into stepping stones, to the point that the worst things that ever happened to us become the best things that ever happened to us.
To the core of His being, God is a redeemer, and I’m personally praying and believing that for Josh Duggar and his entire family, God will turn this painful situation around for greater good.
Let’s watch and see.
This is post Clinton and the great nightly news discussions raging over the meaning of the word “is”.
See I would probably be the one in jail because my first reaction would have been to grab a baseball bat. I do not know the details of sin/crimes. I really do not want to hear the details. I do not believe some of these who pulled out their chairs of judgment give a rats behind about the victims.
OK. Got it. From now on I will have you review my posts for correctness, so we don’t have any misunderstandings.
LOL
Haha
OMG!
:)
Okay. But, to which "authorities" would you send a 14yo boy? Where would you send him?
This father chose to send his son away to a 4-month treatment program involving hard labor (reportedly, anyway). If the boy had been arrested and charged, he might've spent that same amount of time in a juvenile prison. Then what should've been done with him?
And suppose, after reporting one child to the police, the other children are removed from the home while the state "investigates." You can't protect those children if they're not with you.
It sounds like a complicated situation to me when it's about a 14yo.
You see for your claim of sarcasm to hold water, you would have to mean the opposite.
You said Gothard should teach parents to take their 14 year old sons to prostitutes. But later you claimed it was sarcasm.
But what would the opposite be in this case? It would be that Gothard has done a fine job of guiding these parents, a position you OBVIOUSLY do not hold.
When I asked for clarification, you doubled down and said you really meant what you said about parents taking their young sons to prostitutes. That plus your rejoicing in the good old days of your childhood Playboy perusal.
But I am supposed to be ridiculous because it is NOT obvious to me that your comments were sarcasm.
And instead of defending yourself, you use leftists strategies of avoiding all logic, reason, debate with banal humor, insults, and pointless, effortless, meaningless replies.
Here’s my first suggestion: when you post, have a point.
Go ahead and try to hide behind your facade of laughter. You have been exposed and have NO answer. All you can do is mock like the leftists you mimic so well.
I have pointed out clearly why your claims of sarcasm do not hold water. You can continue to promote your sideshow or back peddle. Either way, you have no leg to stand on.
I am not sure about the hard labor thing they sent him to. It sounds like it was under the wing of a sex offender, and he helped build a house. It doesn’t sound like anyone dealt with examining the risk to children of this young man. And he should not have been allowed back into the home. He molested the girls there repeatedly.
It would be horrible if the other children were removed instead of that boy. That is one reason to get him out IMMEDIATELY with no chance of ever returning.
You mentioned Palanski and Duggar in the same context now you are saying one is really different from the other in terms of recidivism. The minor in the Polannski case could not have yes legally even if she felt she meant it. Explosive stories are just coming out now about how Hollywood bigwigs molested minor aged starlets and young male actors. Why was the Duggars story coming out JUST now...some tail wagging the “dog” perhaps?
You misunderstood what I said completely. Duggar should not get one more iota of sympathy because he wears the Christian banner, than Mr. Polanski. If anything, Duggar is worse because he was attacking small children. While Polanski’s sex was worse, Duggar kept coming back.
Did you hear him ask her after kissing her if that turned her on? Did you hear his smirks as he bent his knees and leaned into her? Looked sexual to me. I think he was joking but I don’t think it was proper in front of his teenage daughter and her date.
Having a girl to bounce on his knee in a nighty is precisely what got Bill Gothard in trouble. Bill Gothard was one of the people counseling Josh.
I’m really not making it up, unlearner. It’s a clip from one of their shows. Go to youtube and type in “duggars golf course.”
Thank you, trisham. No wonder Josh Duggar is screwed up.
The edited version you posted distorts what happened. Here is the actual show version:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8XGMm-f53wk
The father makes a putt. His wife says he is really good. He asks “does that turn you on?” And then kisses her.
I know an 82 year old professor who uses the same term to ask if students like something. It does sound weird, but the professor is not intending it sexually.
The comment does not seem sexual to me in context.
Neither does the supposed grinding. He helps his wife learn to hold and swing a putter. Golfing involves bending and positioning your knees correctly. That is what I saw. Projecting something sexual onto this does not fit as far as I’m concerned.
Sorry, no smoking gun here. When I first heard this described, I thought it was something that might make me change my mind about this couple. Definitely not the case. I have no problem with a married couple behaving this way in public. It’s cute. It’s sweet. Making something immoral out of it seems beyond puritanical.
Their position on dating, touching, etc. seems very strict. I cannot imagine trying to impose those standards on married people.
If I saw a man showing his wife how to play golf by standing behind her and bending his knees to be in the right position to putt, I wouldn’t think twice about it.
Never heard any sexual comments. And his actions did not look sexual to me."
Then you must be a virgin, because Pop Duggar was simulating how it's done. He was grinding himself into her rear. Now you might want to pretend otherwise, but that's immaterial.
You say you didn't hear any sexual comments. Well, you can see, right? And read? Did you SEE the caption pop up as he said, "Did that turn you on?"
You posted recently that you've met Gothard and think he's a fine man and impressive and all that. You'd be a great candidate for his cult---you refuse to believe even your own eyes and ears.
I’ve read nothing about “hard labor.” They sent him away on a summer job helping someone build houses. You make it sound like he was breaking up rocks and wearing stripes.
Note that when the summer was over, he came right back into the house to live with the girls he abused. Must have been nice for them, huh?
After the Oprah show notified the authorities, the cops told the father to bring Josh in for an interview. He refused, lawyered up, and let the statute of limitations run out.
I know an 82 year old professor who uses the same term to ask if students like something. It does sound weird, but the professor is not intending it sexually.
The comment does not seem sexual to me in context."
LOL
"Cute." "Sweet."
Unlearner, do you not get that the question "does that turn you on" has a different meaning when a man kisses a woman than when a professor gives a lecture?
The thing is, I think you do. I believe you've not only met Gothard and been "impressed" by him; I believe you follow him.
Sorry, the cult mindset is hard to miss.
I think Jim Bob dry humping his wife from behind on the putt-putt golf course and excitedly asking his wife if that turned her on (on national TV) is emotional incest of his daughter there.
He and Michelle are both guilty of mentally molesting the minds of their children by their constant habit of drawing their kids into their sex life in discussions.
Now. Regarding your statement, "Honey, you are not the judge of dispersing full dishes".....well, you better look in the mirror, sister, because earlier on in the thread you were doing just that yourself. So you'd do well to keep shut about judging...otherwise you look like a first class hypocrite.
What's that stuff about "dispersing full dishes", anyway? I never heard it before. It's kind of silly.
And to your question, "Do you really think GOD is not able to disperse HIs judgement?".....where did I imply such?
Finally, to your demand to know what church I attend, the answer is none of your business. Got that?
From the tone of your freepmail, I get the distinct impression that you really don't take it well when people "puff themselves up to you." YOU like to be the one doing the puffing up, right? ;)
Maybe you should watch the unedited video. Go to the 5:00 mark:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8XGMm-f53wk
Then tell me if you think he’s doing what the other video claimed to show him doing. Or is he showing his wife how to bend her knees while swinging the club?
I might not like some of their comments, but he wasn’t doing what you thought he was doing.
And, for the record, I never met this man Gothard, nor did I ever hear about him until this story broke.
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