White House Petition Aims To Stop The Javascript Scourge

InformationWeek ^ | 3/27/2016 | Curtis Franklin Jr.

[ImJustAnotherOkie]

Some programming languages are so bad, so dangerous, that the full weight of the US federal government must be brought to bear on ending their use. That's the premise of a petition now seeking signatures at the "We the People" section of the White House web site.

The petition, entered on the site March 16, 2016, asks the government to, "Outlaw programming languages that threaten the safety of the American people and work counter to our way of life." The petitioner is even kind enough to provide examples of these evil and dangerous languages.

Which programming languages deserve the fate normally reserved for terrorists and drug pushers? Javascript, Ruby, and Java are called out by name. According to the petition, "

[ImJustAnotherOkie]

I didn't see Python. I like it. Javascript is pretty crazy. A language only a liberal could love, no rules, scatter crap all over the place and see what happens.

[E. Pluribus Unum]

Java should be at the top of the list. It’s just plain evil.

[Paladin2]

I’m thinkin’ the worst language scourge is that promulgated in the Federal Register.

[No One Special]

Yes, we will ask the government to outlaw speech whichis exactly what this does.

[ronnietherocket3]

While we are at it, can we ban COBOL?

I do have sympathy for banning Javascript. Too many websites that I go to have too much crap that moves all over the place or their use of javascript allows them to make the webpage impossible to navigate and find information. This is one of the worst offenders in my opinion.

[SeeSharp]

Java should be at the top of the list. It’s just plain evil.

Proper name: SlowJava.

[ConservativeMind]

I’d say “C” is the worst. It’s ugly and you can do everything bad to your computer you’d desire.

[Lazamataz]

The petition, entered on the site March 16, 2016, asks the government to, "Outlaw programming languages that threaten the safety of the American people and work counter to our way of life."

Duh. That is EVERY computer programming language. EVERY ONE OF THEM.

Much like a gun, it is not the tool, it is the evil intent of a bad guy.

[NCjim]

Just ban crappy programmers.

[Lazamataz]

How to Disable JavaScript

I found no need to do this, simply by loading Adblock.

[Rurudyne]

No delegated power given the federal to ban any domestically grown, produced or manufactured good.

[867V309]

1. Install NoScript; enable scripting only when you totally trust the site
2. Disable Flash
3. Disable Java
4. Disable HTML in email, read all email as plain text.
5. Don't open any email attachment unless you already know what it is
6. Don't run any executable unless it if from a source you'd trust your computers life with. Because you are.

[Vic S]

LISP is the only pure language, ban everything else. Especially Smalltalk and Ada.
/s

[lafroste]

Whatever happened to PHP, MySQL, and Apache? I knew those. Now I feel old.

[dfwgator]

It’s all 0s and 1s in the end.

[ClearCase_guy]

If we are getting rid of languages, can Spanish be next?

[Lazamataz]

BAN 1’S AND 0’S!!!!

[Lazamataz]

Anyone who likes PHP is a fan of thrown Scrabble tiles.

[Azeem]

“Whatever happened to PHP, MySQL, and Apache? I knew those. Now I feel old.”

That’s a little thing called WordPress.

[Lazamataz]

LISP is stupid. I hated that damn course in college. CAR CAR CDR CDR CAR CAR *THIS*.