ROTFLMAO!!!!
“Don’t you die on me!”
“Want me to me make dinner”
“No, I know still tired from doing it in 2003”
LOL!!!
1. NEVER do the same chore two days in a row. If you do, that chore becomes yours in perpetuity.
2. Chores. When your wife gives you a chore, take some time to check it out. Take a day researching it on the internet. Order something - Anything. Take two days ‘waiting’ on the part(s). Take a day gathering the tools together and ‘schedule’ the repair. By this time maybe she’ll have forgotten about it.
3. My daughter likes to ‘flinch’ whenever her husband is with her out in public like he’s going to beat her. They both laugh but then he gets a funny look on his face like he’s been had.
4. Wife in hospital just after having baby holding it. Nurse comes in to do checks and says “is this the father?” Wife says, “That’s my husband, but I’m not sure about the father part.”
5. Never tell a woman that she farts in bed, sometimes loud enough to rouse her from sleep. Also, never tell a woman one boob is lower/higher than the other.
Hubby: (at the dinner table) We’ve been married a whole year, and you haven’t burned anything yet.
Me: Would you like me to start?
Hubby: (at the dinner table) We’ve been married a whole year, and you haven’t burned anything yet.
Me: Would you like me to start?