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Why God is a Republican and Santa Claus is a Democrat
Parliament of Whores: A Lone Humorist Attempts To Explain The Entire U. S. Government
| 1991
| P. J. O'Rourke
Posted on 12/08/2001 1:22:36 PM PST by EveningStar
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P. J. O'Rourke
Parliament of Whores: A Lone Humorist Attempts To Explain The Entire U. S. Government
Atlantic Monthly Press, 1991
1
posted on
12/08/2001 1:22:36 PM PST
by
EveningStar
(k3w@earthlink.net)
To: EveningStar
The quid pro quo is the vote of the recipient of the gifts that were taken from under my tree.
2
posted on
12/08/2001 1:31:21 PM PST
by
Kay Soze
To: EveningStar
Your God is too small.
To: EveningStar
To: EveningStar
The W.F. Buckley for those of us who loved Lampoon in the 70's and then grew up an got jobs and voted for Mulroney/Reagan/Thatcher.
P.J. is a national treasure.
Please don't drive fast on drugs while not spilling your drink. If you haven't read the following you've never seen the whole P.J.
P.J.'s Geatest
5
posted on
12/08/2001 1:44:35 PM PST
by
mitchbert
To: EveningStar
Santa A Democrat huh? Santa works one day a year.
Santa confines small unpaid Polar American servants to do his biding and tells them he is helping them.
Santa takes advantage of a rare species of draft animal to pull his load and allow those animals free reign on your property.
Santa wants small children to sit on his lap.
Santa makes promises to children he knows have little chance of being kept.
Santa sneaks into peoples houses and slinks into the children's rooms.
Santa claims that all the gifts under the tree each year are from him.
Maybe he is a Democrat.
To: EveningStar
ON THE RISE OF WOMEN: "Women are successful in the business world because the business world was created by men. Men are babies. And women are
Good With Kids."
To: Deadeye Division
Thanks! :)
To: HighWheeler
Never trust a man who plays with elves.
To: EveningStar
I'm tired of paying the milk and cookie tax!
10
posted on
12/08/2001 2:20:14 PM PST
by
arielb
To: EveningStar
I visualize God as a gigantic muscular man with the head of an Eagle. Now there's a God you have to respect. :^)
To: HighWheeler
Who are these enslaved elves that are said to procure and build everything Santa gives away?
Is it all really free?
To: EveningStar
. He gives everyone everything they want without the thought of quid pro quo.
At least we know now that Bill Clinton ain't Santa Claus!
To: arielb
Serve him beer this year. Guaranteed that you get what you want.
To: mitchbert
To: EveningStar
LOL
16
posted on
12/08/2001 3:42:57 PM PST
by
eternity
To: EveningStar
PJ bump! Santa
used to be a tough guy. Kids around the world really did try to behave near Christmas so they'd get a present and not the dreaded lump of coal.
I mentioned coal at the drug store the other day, said my brother deserved a lump, and the 20ish cashier had never heard of Santa giving coal for the "naughty" kids on his list.
My brother sent me a Christmas card that sums up my thoughts re. Santa: There are two kinds of people in the world, those who believe in Santa, and Communists! (^:
To: EveningStar
Why God is a Republican and Santa Claus is a Democrat..could you translate this into chingbolo, please
18
posted on
12/08/2001 3:53:43 PM PST
by
exmoor
To: EveningStar
From an old /usr/games/fortune/fortunes.dat file [posting from memory]: Santa wears a read suit. Must be a communist. And that beard--must be a pacifist. What's in that pipe he's smoking?
19
posted on
12/08/2001 8:02:20 PM PST
by
supercat
Comment #20 Removed by Moderator
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