Could Mr. Right be white? [Black women choosing white men]

Atlanta Journal-Constitution ^ | 7/13/2

[conservatism_IS_compassion]

the resulting hiring quotas that come with it continue to perpetuate racial tension, especially when a better qualified white person is passed over for a job in order for a hiring quota to be made

As Sowell points out, if 10 whites are passed over to give one black the job, you have ten who feel aggrieved even tho only one could have had the job.

[arm958]

We are not going to end racism in this country until we treat everybody equally

Some of the black guys I've worked with have told me about their frustration with being routinely followed around stores by security people. It's gotta suck when you are treated like a two bit shoplifter when you are actually an Army Lietenant Colonel and war veteran (as one of the guys who relayed his woes to me is).

[Redcloak]

This is interesting when one considers that the demographic group that's historically had the greatest anger about Black men dating White women has been Black women. They were far more likely to label as a "race traitor" a Black man seeing women outside of his race.

[conservatism_IS_compassion]

I had the experience of attending a HS reunion back in about 1960, and noticed that the sole black in attendance was alone. I asked her to dance, and felt like 100% of the eyes in the room were on us. That was then, maybe this is now. But the legacy of racism is a tough problem, no doubt.

Found out five years ago that 10% of our class had passed on--and that she was among them, unfortunately. They say that Social Security is an even worse deal for blacks due to lower life expectancy, and the (sparse) statistics of our class fit that pattern . . .

[Rose in RoseBear]

Hmmm ... I guess we were stared at on my first visit to the U.P.?

I didn't notice ... I was preoccupied with a certain lumberjack ...

But, seriously, I don't notice most stares. I do find, though, that if we go to a restaurant twice, the wait staff remembers us the third time! And I can only remember once when black people expressed any disdain, and I turned my nose back up at them. I'm too old for that silliness.

[Skywalk]

No, not just Alabama trend at all, my friend.

No matter where I've been, the white women with black men all seem to be one of the following:

1)wanna-be gangstas/black. They get their hair done to mimic black styles, they speak "ebonics" and end up with kids out of wedlock

2)FAT FAT FAT. Sheesh, I've seen some good looking black guys with some FAT white women. Damn, find yourself a skinny Asian girl, bruh, what the hell are you doin?!

3)Myth-chasers/parent-scandalizers. So intent on proving their liberal worldview, or believing in a different level of sexuality existing in blacks, they chase melanin-abundants with gusto.

4)Some combination of two or more of these elements.

My friends and I(black, mixed in my case) are disgusted with most of these women as our individuality as intelligent, freedom-loving, hockey-playing(at least my one friend) MEN is overlooked for some stereotype. Funny how no one ever tries to act black by imitating Benjamin Banneker, Charles Drew or Morgan Freeman. And few black men-chasers date anything EXCEPT black men. With a lot of the guys I know who date interracially they keep their options OPEN, not closed like these women.

What's bizarre is my experience in Seattle. While white men/Asian women is fairly common everywhere I've lived, I have NEVER seen so many black women with white men. Granted the black population of King County is something like 5 percent, but still it's been a new sight for me. Other infrequent combinations are also more common here.

[Skywalk]

(somewhat off-topic)
I work in retail security, and while I feel for those who are followed simply because of race, our company absolutely stresses surveillance based on suspicious BEHAVIORS(such as quickly selecting items without checking price or specs, out of season clothing etc) I'm biracial, but I have no problem telling you that blacks make up a disproportionate number of the incidents/apprehensions in our district. Now this doesn't mean we haven't caught 15 year old white girls(actually this is something to look for, teen girls often shoplift) but that for a county where blacks make up 5 percent of the populace, they account for more than their 'fair share.'

We've also had a shoplifter(known and arrested) confront our undercover person with charges of racism. Meanwhile, he was stealing hundreds of dollars worth of stuff once a week. I find it difficult sometimes to follow a black person because of potential accusations. Not to mention the time I was merely waiting for a cashier to finish a transaction and the guy(to his credit calmly and kindly) questioned my motivation for waiting near the cashier and wondering if it was due to his race. He was actually nice, but it makes one wary of even walking down the same aisle as a black person, for fear of the accusations.

[arm958]

It sounds like you are very professional. I do realize that there is another side to the story. While it must be frustrating for law-abiding blacks to be followed simply for being black (by those less professional than you), the statistics don't lie. To those law-abiding blacks I say: Blame profiling if you want, but you must place equal blame on blacks who commit crimes far out of proportion to their representation in society.

[Unassuaged]

Well, I was taught that the world is not so 'black and white', some were sold, and some were just, ah, poached so to speak from a coastal area...

[FairWitness]

"I've dated a lot of black men and they don't understand me, either," says Bailey, who is a published writer and a temp worker. "It's all about what you've read, what you've studied. I've dated people who have no understanding of the Middle Passage, colorism, any sort of understanding of the black experience. And they were black."

If you pick at a scab every day, you will have it forever.

[medved]

One thing you have to notice about black women is that they do come in these 6' sizes and can still walk and chew gum at the same time...

[rambo316]

Chasio,

You want to know why that is? All you have to do is just turn on your TV and you will get the answer. White women and girls are getting the Nicole Brown Syndrome just by watching the crap on TV. White gals are just doing it, to stand out and black guys do it just to "Taint". That is a fact.

[NativeNewYorker]

I don't have the data at my fingertips (this being Sunday morning at 8:20), but anecdotally, black males' propensity for lifelong monogamous marriage has been in secular decline for generations. So asking what the impact of this is on their ability to "find wives" doesn't seem too relevant, and if anything, is backwards. Their female counterparts, long suffering their erstwhile mates' wanderlust, have decided to move on.

The social impact is seen already in ghetto neighborhoods, with unattached black men in evidence. And it is also seen on college campuses where black women are disproportionately seen, and in the census data, when they marry white guys.

Darwin would approve.

[NativeNewYorker]

So does this mean that white men are better endowed?

YES.

Better endowed in the sense of the complete package of attributes women seek in a mate.

[NativeNewYorker]

Yes, racism is an equal opportunity affliction. :)

[NativeNewYorker]

they can't date bums

I'm framing this one, for when my daughter, now 3, dates.

[NativeNewYorker]

So you are proof of the robustness of hybrids! :)

[GreatOne]

"you still haven't explained where those black men are going to find wives"

I don't think the majority of them do. I think that most of these urban-dwellers prefer to have sex with as many women as they can, which results in many out-of-wedlock births, and gives them "honor". Case in point is my sister - got mixed with up with some dirtbag who told her how wonderful she was, etc. She gets pregnant. When she arrived home, she discovered that he had been seeing other women the whole time with her. He has now fathered 5 children with 4 other women.

Also, look at professional athletes, and how many kids they have, and with how many different women. I believe that it has somehow become part of the black "culture" to just spread their seed around. Sounds stupid, but I don't see whites doing this on anywhere near their level.

[Tall_Texan]

Will they draw a blank stare at the first mention of P-funk, nappy hair and playing the dozens?

They would from me. I get the "nappy hair", but the other two phrases mean nothing to me. Funk, I assume, is music. "The dozens?" Makes me think of welfare queens.

[Mamzelle]

re:

Most inter-race couples I see here in Sodom are black men with white women. They are fairly common, and outnumber the obverse easily 10:1. White man - oriental woman couples out number the obverse by about 5:1. Just my observations, in Manhattan.)))

Read this article, and I was interested in how they carefully left out what you and I thought was obvious--that there are many more blackM/whiteW pairings... one of the reasons that black women are taking a look at white men is likely that the black men who are on their way up the ladder so often choose white women. You don't have to hang around a high school too many days, or a hospital, or any where there are a good number of black women working or studying before you become conscious of the rage so many black women feel over this...that they are rejected for white women, and not very pretty white women at that. It's gotta hurt.

I also thought it was funny that the writer only spoke of the choices of black women...not too interested in what the white men might think. If W men are commitment-terrified with W women, do you think they'll have more commitment with a black woman? I wonder if the men aren't going where they think a marriage tradition is very weak, and won't feel pressured...

I do notice a lot of guys of all races quite besotted with Asian dolls. So much so that the Asian girls have become quite the demanding, high-maintenance pricesses...I watch this at close range with great amusement...