[general_re]

"Fire phasers." (phasers fire).

"Spock, what effect?"

"The asteroid has been obliterated, Captain, however, sensors reveal that a Klingon warship has just dropped out of warp near Saturn."

A common misconception, but phasers will not destroy large asteroids. What you need to do is find the alien obelisk that contains the asteroid-repulsion beam...

[PatrickHenry]

I have two possible solutions. First, since Physicist says we can't deflect the asteroid, we'll just have to move the earth. If that's not feasable, then we should deploy Congressman Gerold Nadler to the point of impact, so he can act as a bumper.