Posted on 9/23/2002, 12:06:25 PM by chance33_98
Twas the night before Jihad
and all through the land
Not a muslim was stirring
Not even saddam
The enslaved women and suicide bombers
were all snuggled in bed
Not realizing that in minutes
They all would be dead
When out in the sky their arose such a clatter
That Saddam flew to his window to see what was the matter
Up in the sky, almost too far too tell
Flew a B1 bomber, carrying a nuclear hell
The glow of the bomb on the desert below
Gave the lustre of daylight to the objects below
When what to his wondering eyes did appear
But a big mushroom cloud as his eyes filled with tears
With a little old pilot, so lively and quick
Saddam knew in a moment that he was in deep s--t
So rapid, like eagles, the Americans flew
The pilot, he swore, must be a jew
Now, Bush! Now, Cheyney, and condolezza Rice!
It was all over for Saddam this nuclear night.
To the heart of Baghdad, right above the palace wall
We nuked that saddam, we toasted them all
As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,
So the remnants of baghdad rose to the sky
All the houses, and many mosques too
Sucked up into the cloud and away they all flew
He woke up sweating, all quiet this night
Not a bomber in the sky, not a jew in site
He ran to the phone, as his bladder went empty
Better to let those inspectors in then lose his whole country.
'Twas the night before Christmas,
And all through the house,
No food was a-stirrin',
Not even a mouse.
Stockings were hung round
Dad's nick like a tie,
Along with a note that said,
"Presents or die."
Children were plotting
All night in their beds,
While the wife's constant whining
Was splitting his head.
But daddy had money
This year in the bank,
Then they closed up early,
And now dad's in a tank.
All of a sudden,
Santa appeared,
A sneer on his face,
Booze in his beard.
"Santa," I said,
As he laughed merrily,
"You do so much for others,
Do something for me."
"Bundy," he said,
"You only sell shoes,
Your son is a sneak thief,
Your daughter's a floose."
"Ho ho," Santa said,
"Should I mention your wife?
Her hair's like an A-bomb,
Her nails like a knife."
He climbs up the chimney,
That fat piece of dung,
He mooned me two times,
He stuck out his tongue.
I heard him exclaim,
As he broke wind with glee,
"You're married with children,
You'll never be free."
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