A Few of FR's Finest....Every Day....10-17-02

JohnHuang2 and Billie

[LadyX]

I'll be laughing forever, here at 'the birthing' of a great phrase..:)))

Can't wait for tomorrow to gleefully repost your humdinger, loddy!
You deserve all the bows you choose to take!

Wait until the overseers at the range hear of this, Flyer - they already keep a watchful eye on your group - and have to love you - well, kinda..:))
LOL

[Flyer]

they already keep a watchful eye on your group - and have to love you - well, kinda.

A range officers job is boring. We give them something to do and good conversation after work.

[Dubya]

Dear Ma and Pa:

I am well. Hope you are. Tell Brother Walt and Brother Elmer the Army
beats working for Old Man Minch a mile. Tell them to join up quick before
maybe all the places are filled.

I was restless at first because you got to stay in bed till nearly 6 am!
but I am getting so I like to sleep late. Tell Walt and Elmer all you do
before breakfast is smooth your cot and shine some things -- no hogs to
slop, feed to pitch, mash to mix, wood to split, fire to lay. Practically
nothing. You got to shave, but it is not bad in warm water.

Breakfast is strong on trimmings like fruit juice, cereal, eggs, bacon,
etc., but kind of weak on chops, potatoes, beef, ham steak, fried eggplant,
pie and regular food. But tell Walt and Elmer you can always sit between
two city boys that live on coffee. Their food plus yours holds you till
noon, when you get fed.

It's no wonder these city boys can't walk much. We go on "route marches,"
which, the Sgt. says, are long walks to harden us. If he thinks so, it is
not my place to tell him different. A "route march" is about as far as to
our mailbox at home. Then the city guys all get sore feet and we ride back
in trucks. The country is nice, but awful flat.

The Sgt. is like a schoolteacher. He nags some. The Capt. is like the
school board. Cols. and Gens. just ride around and frown. They don't
bother you none.

This next will kill Walt and Elmer with laughing. I keep getting medals for
shooting. I don't know why. The bull's-eye is near as big as a chipmunk
and don't move. And it ain't shooting at you, like the Higsett boys at
home. All you got to do is lie there all comfortable and hit it. You don't
even load your own cartridges. They come in boxes.

Be sure to tell Walt and Elmer to hurry and join before other fellows get
onto this setup and come stampeding in.

Your loving son, Zeb

[Dubya]

"CAMP LEJEUNE, NC"




Eve and me are leaving for Camp Lejeune be back about Oct. 30.
You guys keep up the good work.
Going to have BarBQ at Blessingers in SC on the way.

JESUS SAVES
DUB & EVE

[LadyX]

Give 'em good conversation - yeah!!

"Hey, Joe, are those Kaos Kids returning next week?"
"Think Tom's really gonna do the guns a'blazin' routine again?!"

"Will we hafta do another Accident Report?" groan

"Oh, no - Breaker Breaker's back..:(( "

"Next they'll drag a Civil War cannon out here to eradicate the al Claydas ~ ~ ~ "

[lodwick]

Classic - you guys have a super trip and I'll see ya on my birthday. That's so sweet of you. ;-)

[lodwick]

I shudder to imagine the firepower that this group could bring to bear were it not for the three bones for each additonal weapon.

The mind boggles.

Arrange your schedule for the Spring Shoot. ;-)

[JustAmy]

LOL
This is so funny and probably so true!!

[LadyX]

I'll be there in spirit, loddy, now and then..:)
You'll have to write a special report on this one, though, from the eyes of an 'outsider' on The Finest's Own Range Rovers taking on the al claydas.
It should be a classic.

[lodwick]

OH NO! It's More
BLONDE JOKES!

Did you hear about the blonde who only smelled good on the right side?
She didn't know where to buy Left Guard!

How can you tell when a blonde has been using your computer?
There's white-out all over the screen.

Why did the blonde lose her job as an elevator operator?
She couldn't remember the route.

What do blondes and cow pies have in common?
The older they get, the easier they are to pick up.

How do you put a twinkle in a blonde's eye?
Shine a flashlight in her ear.

What goes "VROOM... SCREECH... VROOM... SCREECH... VROOM... SCREECH..."?
A blonde at a flashing red light!

What do you call a blonde skeleton in the closet?
The winner of the Hide and Seek game.

Did you hear about the blonde who won a gold medal at the Olympics?
She was so proud of it she had it bronzed.

Why do blondes write TGIF on their shoes?
"Toes Go In First"!

What do you call a blonde in a leather jacket?
A rebel without a clue!


It's getting late for me guys. ;-)

[JustAmy]

An Amish boy and his father were visiting a mall. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and back together again. The boy asked his father, "What is this, Father?" The father [never having seen an elevator] responded "Son, I have never seen anything like this in my life, I don't know what it is."

While the boy and his father were watching wide-eyed, an old lady in a wheel chair rolled up to the moving walls and pressed a button. The walls opened and the lady rolled between them into a small room. The walls closed and the boy and his father watched small circles of lights with numbers above the walls light up. They continued to watch the circles light up in the reverse direction.

The walls opened up again and a beautiful 24-year-old woman stepped out. The father said to his son, "Go get your mother."

***************


Heh Heh Heh

[LadyX]

"It's getting late for me guys. ;-)"

Going to rest on your laurels, eh, JL, and exit stage left?!!

Yew done good today..:))

[JustAmy]

At a jewelry store, a young man bought an expensive locket as a present for his girlfriend. "Don't you want her name engraved upon it?" asked the jeweler. The young man thought for a moment, and then, ever the pragmatic, steadfastly replied,

"No, just engrave it: To My One And Only Love. That way, if we break up and she throws it back to me in anger, I can use it again."

*************


Heh Heh Heh

[lodwick]

Some days are better than others, but if the left coast is going to join in, I may rally for a few more posts.

Frank - the elevator joke is so old, and so classic - thanks for bringing it. ;-)

[JustAmy]

Okay, Lodwick .... How about this one?

A couple of blondes were driving through Louisiana when they came to a sign that told them they were almost to Natchitoches. They argued all the way there about how to pronounce the name of the town. Finally they stopped for lunch. After getting their food, one of the blondes said to the cashier, "Can you settle an argument for us? Very slowly, tell us where we are."

The cashier leaned over the counter and said:

"Buuurrrrrr-Gerrrrrr Kiiiinnnnnggg"

**********



Heh Heh Heh

[LadyX]

I keep forgetting it's only 8 out there.
I'm watching the 11 p.m. news!

[JustAmy]

Or ....... How about this one?

Two blondes were in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of their Mercedes with a coat hanger. They tried and tried to get the door open, but they just couldn't! The blonde with the coat hanger stopped for a moment to catch her breath. The other blonde said anxiously, "Hurry up! It's starting to rain and the top is down."

******************


Heh Heh Heh

[Aquamarine]

LOL! That was hilarious! The best things written anywhere are posted right here on Freerepublic, thanks for sharing your abundance of talent with us. :)

[LadyX]

Oh, no!!
I love it, Amy JustFrank!

[Aquamarine]

You're from the area around Indian River? Some of the best produce grown in the South comes out of that area. I have some Indian River orange juice in my fridge that has the freshest orange juice taste around!