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To: sonserae
Yes...and HE asked me for coffee. When I arrived, I was on time. He had already bought coffee for himself...so I stood in line and bought my own and he didn't offer. Believe me, I have a whole list of stories like this.

My , My, what on earth were you thinking?

Why would YOU?? stand in line for coffee? I would never have done that, never would have went in line, nor would I have bought my own coffee. Why did you not just sit down and tell him outright that you were thristy( if he did not offer to go get you some right away)? Why didnt you just come out and ask him if he was going to buy you coffee or not?

Clearly, you were not posturing, or presenting, yourself as a lady, who demands to be treated as one. YOu must present yourself as one who is to be catered to, to be waited on.

If he will not get you a coffee on your first date, just how do you think he will treat you after 10 years of marraige? You have to get started on the right foot, from the getgo, with each man you meet.

Also, even if you are carrying your own handgun, you should still have expected an escort to your car.

This guy was a total loser, and you did nothing to help him learn how to correctly treat women. Good riddance to that guy, but you must learn how to make men treat you the way you want.

159 posted on 10/31/2002 3:33:16 PM PST by waterstraat
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To: waterstraat
"You must present yourself as one who is to be catered to, to be waited on. "

I must strongly disagree.

Anytime a person misrepresents his or her true self they are sowing the seeds of trouble down the road. Contrary to your statement "you must learn how to make men treat you the way you want" you cannot make someone to be anything.

True change comes from deep within, not from being imposed from without.

160 posted on 10/31/2002 3:42:55 PM PST by bcoffey
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To: waterstraat
I did ask him for coffee...but he made no move to buy it for me. When he asked me out a second time, I sent him a long email talking about "human considerations" and that he was not thinking of my well-being when he drove away while I walked to my car. Of course, if a man treats you like this in the first place, they have no capacity for understanding when you try to explain it to them. He responded with "Well, it's not like we were in a relationship or anything."...I explained to him that I would give a ride to any of my friends whether we were in a relationship or not.

For anyone who doesn't live in Los Angeles, you don't understand. You can conduct yourself as a woman and command respect...but many of the men here have never ever learned to even have human considerations and manners let alone treating a woman "special". This is not a rare story. My friends and I have story after story. When we come across a well-mannered man, it is truly on the miraculous side. I know to date Southern men as they have been raised with manners and treat women with respect.
163 posted on 10/31/2002 4:00:03 PM PST by sonserae
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